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Funny story daquan
1. The hospital has 100 fences to prevent patients from escaping.

Two mental patients still want to escape from the hospital. Trying to climb over the wall in the dark.

Turn to the thirtieth wall.

"Are you tired?"

"Not tired."

So the two continued to turn outwards.

Turn under the 60th wall.

"Are you tired?"

"Not tired."

So the two continued to turn outward and turned to the 99 th wall.

"Are you tired?"

"Tired!"

"Well, let's go home."

Two. The blind and the lame

The blind and the lame ride motorcycles, the blind ride, and the lame watch the road. There is nothing wrong with the journey.

Turning a corner, the lame man suddenly found a ditch on the road and shouted, "ditch!" " Ditch! Ditch! "

Hearing this, the blind man sang, "Loy, Loy, Loy ..."

As a result, the blind and the lame fell into the ditch together with the car.

. Magical side effects

At a medical seminar, a physician announced that he had invented a magical new drug.

Another doctor asked, "What disease is it used for?"

"We have no diseases that can be cured with drugs."

Another doctor asked, "Where is its magic?"

The doctor was silent for a while and said, "Its side effects will make patients lose their short-term memory, so several patients have paid my medical bills three or four times."

All the doctors attending the seminar stood up and applauded warmly.

4. It's delicious

A Hollywood director decided to give his mother a birthday present. He heard that there was a bird.

Being able to speak 12 languages and sing 10 famous songs, I immediately decided to buy this bird.

For the sake of his mother, he spent 50 thousand dollars on it. On the second day of his mother's birthday, he called her.

"What do you think of this bird? Mom? "

His mother replied happily, "It's delicious."

Kidnapping: I blindfolded you quietly;

Heart disease: you are my chest pain forever;

Schadenfreude: the old cat was driven out by its owner and the mouse came out to see him off;

Killing with a knife: it's about a robber who is too poor to even have a knife;

Generation gap: I just got used to my son's long hair and shaved my head;

Apple: its most brilliant moment was hitting Newton on the head;

6. Never talk to a parrot.

One night, Cindy came home from work and cooked dinner as usual. However, she found that the sink drain pipe in the kitchen seemed to be blocked, so she called William, the water electrician, hoping that he could come and help repair it. William agreed at once and said that he would go to Cindy's house tomorrow afternoon. Because it was during Cindy's office hours, Cindy told him, "I'll put the key under the doormat and come in yourself." I have an Akita dog. Very good. You don't have to worry. Besides, I have a parrot, who is a troublesome guy. No matter what it tells you when you come in. Remember! Never talk to a parrot. "Although William was full of doubts, he agreed.

The next afternoon, William arrived at Cindy's house on time, entered the door and began to repair the kitchen sink. This dog is very good. He didn't bark or bite him. The parrot kept talking and shouting at him. At first William remembered Cindy's suggestion and ignored it, but the parrot kept calling. After a while, William finally couldn't stand it. He shouted at the parrot, "Shut up! You big stupid bird! " The parrot paused, and William thought his roar had some effect. Then, I only heard the parrot imitate Cindy's voice and say, "Dog! Go bite him! " Then I heard a scream from the kitchen.

7. mosquito competition

There are three mosquitoes showing their flying skills. They have farted for a long time, and they are all flushed.

Win or lose a game, so they decided to show each other.

The British mosquito attacked for the first time and saw it fly to a frog and turn around it several times. When it came back, it saw the frog's tongue tied a slipknot. He proudly said, "I'll tell you! In my hometown, if you don't have this ability, it will be finished soon! "

The American mosquito sneered twice: "Hum! Don't mention it! " So he flew to the two frogs and ran back and forth between them several times. When he came back, the tongues of two frogs formed a fast knot. He said, "Hum! In my hometown, you have to do this to survive! "

Chinese mosquitoes disdain to answer, "just kidding! In our hometown, I have never seen such a bad technology! "

British and American mosquitoes were unconvinced and said, "What do you think you have?"

As a result, mosquitoes in China flew to a group of frogs and shuttled through them several times. When they came back, they saw the frog's tongue pulled together and became a "Chinese knot".