1. If I become the emperor, I will make you the prince!

2. Raw, easy. Life is easy. Life is not easy.

3. My cousin is over forty years old. He started studying literature and failed the exam for three consecutive years. Then he practiced martial arts and fired an arrow in the martial arts field, which hit the drummer and drove him out. He changed his studies to medicine, wrote a good prescription, took it, and died.

4. Asking you how much sorrow you can have is like a group of eunuchs going to a brothel...

5. My life has a limit, but my food has no limit.

6. There are two ways to pollute a place: garbage, or money.

7. When we are young, we often make faces in the mirror; when we are old, the mirror is even.

8. Are you blind? You can't see such a big shield, but you want to throw a stone at my head

9. When problems arise, first find the cause within yourself. Don't blame the earth's lack of gravity for constipation.

10. Make decisions with a pat on your head, make promises with a pat on your chest, and leave with a pat on your back.

11. We move too fast, and our souls can’t keep up...

12. Don’t be the same as the people on earth.

13. A girl can transform from a virgin to a woman only once and successfully

But a boy needs repeated training to transform from a virgin to a man.

14. If you go out to hang out, your wife will have to change sooner or later.

15. When I was a child, I thought I could save the whole world when I grew up. But when I grew up, I realized that the whole world could not save me...

16. The rich are all uncles ! But it’s even worse if you don’t pay back the money you owe.

17. Even if I were a toad, I would never marry a female toad.

18. Why sleep for a long time when you are alive? You will sleep forever after death...

19. A tailor who does not want to be a cook is not a good driver.

20. Time is the best teacher, but unfortunately - in the end he killed all his students.

21. On the way to Xi'an for a business trip, a Dalian man boasted about how good Dalian is. He then said that a grand celebration was held on the 100th anniversary of Dalian's founding. Then he asked the person next to him. One person asked: "Are there any celebrations for the 100th anniversary of the founding of Xi'an?" Several Xi'an buddies nearby were stunned. After a while, they forced out a sentence: "I remember that there was a 'beacon fire show' on the anniversary of the founding of Xi'an. Princes..."

22. Diamonds are forever, but one will go bankrupt.

23. On a harmonious campus, the person riding the bicycle may be a doctoral supervisor, while the person driving the Mercedes-Benz may be a logistician...

24. It is gold and will always be spent; yes Mirrors will always reflect light...

25. The reason why my girlfriend is not a nun is because she has not passed Level 4 and is not accepted in the nunnery.

26. Celebrities can become more famous if they take off a little more, but I was arrested even though I took off all my clothes

27. Looking at a beautiful girl, I have no idea how to strike up a conversation. Pick up the brick and step forward, "Classmate, did you drop this?"

28. When I was a child, my dream was not to be a scientist. I imagined that I was a young master from a landlord's family, with thousands of fertile fields. All of a sudden, he was ignorant and incompetent, leading a group of dog slaves to the streets to tease a girl from a good family...

29. Don't talk about your ideals with me, quit it.

30. I can despise you, despise you, look down on you, or ignore you.

31. If a woman wants to please herself, she will allow a man to be poor if he wants to please himself!

32. I am Jesus, his son, coconut!

33. Will spiders hang themselves?

34. Work hard today to avoid looking up to others later.

35. As an animal, I feel a lot of pressure...

36. Because of humility, I am noble. Because we understand, we are compassionate; because we are unfamiliar, we are brave; because of distance, we are beautiful.

37. A man with a narrow mouth and a sweet heart can have a handful of endives!

38. In my village, I have a tractor.

39. Rats carry knives and look for cats all over the street!

40. I have been in elementary school for ten years and middle school for twelve years. I was rated as the most familiar face in the school. When new teachers come, they always ask me about the inside story of the school...

41. What I hate most is when people point the mouse at my head.

42. When watching movies, I am impatient to watch literary and artistic films - AV does not count, AV is an action movie...

43. My dear, don’t worry, I’m done taking a shower. Will flip the signs.

44. You will turn into the sea and be eaten by sharks!

45. Other people’s money is my personal belongings.

46. Zi once said: A man at twenty is a Hitachi, at thirty is a Pentium, at forty is a Microsoft, at fifty is a Panasonic, and at sixty is a copycat...

47. Friendly reminder: This user’s signature is too personal and has been automatically blocked by the system

48. Lie down wherever you fall!

49. In order to cooperate with the successful completion of China’s family planning work this year, I have decided not to have contact with friends of the opposite sex for the time being. Thank you for your cooperation.

50. There are ten sheep, nine squatting in the sheep pen and one squatting in the pig pen. Make an idiom...

51. College is all about learning!

52. The traffic in Beijing almost starves people to death!

53. White-collar workers are nothing but raising pigs.

54. Cigarettes are bad, so we smoke...