In fact, when you are unhappy, it is a long vacation given by fate. When the holiday ends one day, life really begins.
Learn three "please yourself" when you are unhappy, so that you will be satisfied with your life in the future.
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Read yourself: look at yourself and know the direction.
Life is like a long March, and valleys and confusion are inevitable. Those who complain will be stuck in the same place, and those who look at themselves will be reborn.
Zeng Guofan, a famous minister in the late Qing Dynasty, fully reflected on his career at the low point, found the direction of his career, and finally "helped the Qing Dynasty to fall" and established immortal achievements.
At first, Zeng Guofan believed in the Confucian thought of "a gentleman strives for self-improvement", so he was straightforward, lost face and even dared to blackmail Emperor Xianfeng.
During the period of 1857, the Taiping Heavenly Kingdom was in full swing, and only the Xiang army trained by Zeng Guofan could confront it in the Qing Dynasty.
It happened that Zeng Guofan's father died, and Zeng Guofan had to worry about it for three years according to regulations. However, the Taiping Heavenly Kingdom's offensive was fierce, and Emperor Xianfeng kept him.
Zeng Guofan, unappreciative, took the opportunity to blackmail and let the emperor give him the power of a governor.
So, the emperor waved his hand and said, "Then go home and worry."
Zeng Guofan was shocked. He thought that the emperor would compromise, but his wishful thinking was wrong.
Zeng Guofan's career has reached a low point.
After returning home, Zeng Guofan kept thinking: "The emperor doesn't trust, and his colleagues don't go with him. What did he do wrong? "
When Zeng Guofan was depressed, he read the Confucian classics he had read, but he never found the answer.
Finally, he set his eyes on the thin booklet Tao Te Ching.
With his own life experience, he found that the so-called "weakness overcomes strength" in the Tao Te Ching is the truth that should be upheld when entering the WTO.
A seemingly negative birth is actually a positive entry into the WTO, because detours can achieve the goal better.
Thought of here, Zeng Guofan fully understood and excitedly wrote eight big characters on the title page of the book: "Big and soft, just but not just."
This ideological change made Zeng Guofan more and more stable in his later period.
Many times, the trough is a gift of fate, giving you time to reflect on yourself and then start over with a brand-new attitude.
02
Beyond yourself: beyond yourself, break first and then stand.
Some people say, "those who dare to fight have roads on the ground, and those who dare to break have roads everywhere."
Wang Yangming, a great scholar in Ming Dynasty, kept breaking and standing all his life, and finally found the direction and established the theory of mind.
If people want to surpass themselves, only by playing games, breaking old rules and establishing new ones can they achieve self-transcendence.
Wang Yangming said to his teacher when he was very young: "The first thing in life is to study and be a saint."
This sentence laid the road for his life development.
In order to find the way of sages, Wang Yangming had a period of "five drowning", that is, he lost his way in five things.
They are chivalrous, riding and shooting, immortal and Buddha old.
These five aspects are of great help to Wang Yangming's career development, but they are not the way of sages.
During this period, Wang Yangming also staged a "benevolence" based on Zhu's "governor" theory. He stared at the bamboo for seven days, but instead of seeing anything, he fell ill.
This made Wang Yangming doubt Zhu's Neo-Confucianism.
Until the age of thirty-five, he was sent to Longchang, Guizhou, because he offended Liu Jin with his brave words.
Under such circumstances, he began to reflect: "I was sent to Longchang because of my brave words, and the way of sages was not seen." Now my life is in danger. Is it wrong to pursue the path of sages? "
Intense inner conflict finally appeared in Wang Yangming's heart one night.
A loud laugh pierced the night sky, yes, he realized it.
He said: "it is a big mistake to be realistic about foreign things, and the way of being a saint is in everyone's heart."
As the saying goes, "you can only see the vacuum if you break the foreign object."
Looking at the process of Wang Yangming's enlightenment, it is a process of seeking truth from outside.
Break first and then stand, surpass yourself. Break old habits and create a new atmosphere.
03
Please yourself: please yourself and feel at ease.
Some people say: "In order to keep yourself spotless, people will inevitably get tired of human feelings and fame and fortune, but those who know how to live will put physical and mental freedom and pleasure first."
Mr. Ji Xianlin once said, "Life 100% is unattainable, but life is incomplete".
Since life is not perfect, spend the rest of your life with peace of mind.
In Peking University, Mr. Ji is a famous professor, but he is like a free and easy neighbor in life.
The publication of Tsinghua Campus Diary is the best proof. The diary records some thoughts and emotions of Mr. Ji when he was in college, including many extreme words.
At the time of publication, the publishing house considered the image of Mr. Ji and suggested making appropriate deletions.
Mr. Ji said, "I haven't changed a word, and I haven't deleted a word. I am not a saint. I exposed myself in broad daylight. "
This action has been successful and won unanimous praise.
Mr. Ji often eats casually. He said, "To hell with calories and vitamins. Eat when you feel delicious. I have no burden in my heart and a good appetite. "
One Mid-Autumn Festival, Ji Lao specially went to Beijing Moscow Restaurant and tasted their most famous beer and ice cream.
My friend quickly told me, "You are in poor health, so you can't eat ice cream or anything."
Mr. Ji replied humorously: "I am a pig and can eat anything."
In academia, Mr. Ji is recognized as an academic master. In order to get rid of the shackles of fame and fortune, he resolutely does not want any title.
In 2007, Mr. Ji threw away three titles in one fell swoop-master of Chinese studies, academic leader and national treasure.
He said humorously, "When I win three laurels, I will be free."
The biggest willfulness of being a man is to do what you like regardless of everything. Only in this way can we say that we are glad that you came in this life.
Only when you are comfortable physically and mentally can you see your true colors and feel happy.