I think someone must care, such as a boy I met on social software some time ago. He is from my hometown, doing personnel work, which may also be due to work habits. His signature reads "A lover is someone who knows your past and wants to be with you", which makes sense at first glance. After a few words, we added WeChat to continue our conversation. In the basic understanding of each other's situation, or have a good impression on each other. Sure enough, he was curious about my past.
Because I rarely watch it now, and I rarely send a circle of friends, so the circle of friends is closed. Send it occasionally when necessary. He told me: Let's play a game. Let's open our circle of friends to each other, let each other see all the contents, and then ask each other interesting questions.
I'm actually a little reluctant to listen. Obviously, I want to know what your life is like now and in the past. Although understandable, this is for mutual understanding. But I think a person's life is his own privacy, and he can have the right not to tell each other. Besides, I am not interested in other people's past. I don't want to judge a person's present and future by his past. I prefer to get to know him from my point of view in the process of getting along. I believe that people have many faces and many possibilities. I don't like to label others with simple and fixed words. As for other people's past, I am willing to listen to whatever he wants to say, and I don't ask much if I don't want to mention it. So I said no, and he asked me if I was not interested in his past. I replied: not interested. He laughed and cried, and asked, saying that he wanted to know about me. Can you open it? So I opened it for him. I think the circle of friends is the daily life of the past, not so glamorous and wonderful, but I am not afraid of being seen.
So after asking a few irrelevant questions, he asked me if I had been a teacher before. I said yes. He said it was good to be a teacher, and his sister was taking the teacher qualification exam. I want to know why I resigned. In fact, I don't want to say more, not because I'm avoiding it, but because I've made up my mind and put it down, and many people have asked me this question, and I'm a little bored. I gave him a short answer: 1. Working long hours in junior high school, getting up early and going to bed late; 2. The salary is relatively low; 3. I have a bad temper and have a sore throat after a long class; I don't want to stay at home.
He analyzed one by one and came to the conclusion that I had just left the society and was in a bad state. Maybe it's not just a teacher's job, but I will also encounter various problems in other jobs. ...
I might have refuted and explained before, but now I don't want to refute him or explain anything. I listened to him; "Yes, the teacher establishment is very stable, and many people want to go. Maybe I am not suitable. "
This is not a lie, I really think so in my heart. My resignation doesn't mean that my career is not good, just bad for me. I feel very uncomfortable during work. I'm not good at being a teacher, and I don't like educating others. The word "being a teacher" is very heavy for me, which requires high standards and self-discipline. Often worried about missing someone. But many times, when I stand on the podium, I find myself very much like my mother. She loves to preach to us all her life. I feel very sad when I think about it. Moreover, I am not good at words, and the position of Chinese teacher makes me even more incompetent. I have a serious procrastination, and I am used to staying up late to prepare lessons, but I still don't want to go to work the next day. Finally, my relationship with my family is not good, and my family is not short of money. Among my brothers and sisters, I am the only one who finished college and entered the school as a teacher. My family has high expectations. However, the salary is not strong, and the pressure on the third grade is relatively high. I often stay at school on weekends and don't go home. My sister couldn't stand it anymore, saying that I was too irresponsible to my parents when I went back to my hometown to work and didn't go home. Low wages are what everyone does. Live frugally. Why not leave 1000 yuan for living expenses and leave the rest to the family? I don't know how to deal with this request, because my sister is so frugal, but I feel very uncomfortable, that kind of unspeakable discomfort. I know I need to earn more money, and a dead salary is definitely not enough. After the senior high school entrance examination with dolls, I went to Guangzhou to play alone. I almost didn't hesitate to come back and resign, and I haven't regretted making this decision so far. I have done a lot of work now, which is not easy, but I don't have the uncomfortable feeling at that time. I don't know if this is because of my age and experience, or because of changing the track. Maybe both.
In our small city, staying at home and working within the system is decent and stable, with high social recognition. So I believe many people will ask this question when they resign from there. I didn't have a clear plan, and I wasn't the one who wanted to go out and do something big, and I didn't answer their questions. Even now, there is no great achievement, just ordinary support. But I think I am at least peaceful, not afraid of questioning and not denying myself. I won't discourage others from taking the teacher exam because of my resignation, so I won't evaluate this profession too much.
Then this friend asked me if I regretted it? Comfort me. I am funny and angry. But I don't want to dwell on this issue. He agreed with everything he said, and then I stopped replying to him. It's not that there's anything wrong with him, or we can't talk without using force. After all, we didn't know each other very well, and the conversation was shallow and embarrassing. I didn't ask him any questions, just looked at the selfie in his circle of friends, thin and dark, and asked him what it was like to take a selfie.
I think I used to value a person's past, but then I gradually looked down on it. This may have been taught by my first boyfriend. He is a man who lives in the present and looks forward. When he saw me before, he didn't ask me about my past. I'm even afraid that he is just playing. I asked him uneasily, Aren't you curious about my past? You don't ask? He said: I don't care about your past. From what I know about you during my chat with you, I don't think you are a bad person. I'm sure you have no criminal record. I will believe what you say. As for those disgraceful and unwilling pasts, everyone will have them. I don't value this. I care about the present and the future. I just want to live in the present and work hard for a better life in the future. He is really such a person himself. In the past, my family conditions were not good, my education was not high, and I dropped out of school to work. In his early years, he was also very ordinary. He suffered a lot and didn't make any money. Later, he met the opportunity to go back to his hometown and start a business with some like-minded friends. Perhaps it is because his own experience has brought him confidence that he will have such cognition.
As for me, I can understand that others want to know about your past and I am learning how to deal with it better. I think you have to accept yourself anyway, because you are not RMB, and you can't make everyone like you. After all, if others don't accept you, there will naturally be various rhetoric to evaluate you. If you think it makes sense, just listen. Ignore that nonsense and think about the lyrics of a song "It's not that easy"
That friend, do you value others' past?