The desk calendar in front of the desk has no more pages to turn, and 2008 slipped away at that moment.

When I delivered the manuscript yesterday, I saw some books on Sina Reading Channel, and suddenly I felt that I hadn't read for a long time, and my heart seemed to be much less. Those years of immersion in the library are gone for many years. Sometimes a friend gives me some signed books, and I collect them politely. Then I throw them away and seldom read them carefully. It's not that I don't respect them, but that my heart has left the campus and started to be impetuous, holding my breath and thinking less and less alone.

Fast food occupies a part of my leisure life, and my reading is limited to those magazines and entertainment. Love snow disdains watching, chicken soup for the soul doesn't like watching, biographies of celebrities are commonplace, and many things float in the air and turn to the river at will.

My head doesn't touch the sky, my feet don't touch the ground, and I float alone. I don't know where I am, northwest and southeast. Some people around me say that reading 100 books seriously a year will precipitate myself, while I, turning over the bookshelf, are all messy things. I vaguely remember traveling through the university library, remembering the books my friends gave me as birthday gifts, and remembering the books that comforted me just after leaving school. All these are gone. On the way, they are scattered, discarded, given away or sold. Although they are all companions, they walk separately.

Since yesterday, I moved to a new place, bid farewell to the old house completely, stood in an empty room, looked at the handwriting on the wall, but still had to change my face with others. Go back to a person's new house, turn on the TV, climb up the bay window with a cup of warm milk and look down. It's cold outside. At night, the weather is very cold.

I told myself to read some books and use them to stabilize my mood and obey my mood.

At work, I read Hu Lancheng's This Life. Although I have read too many of those sentences, I still have a different understanding after reading them. Some people still ask safety questions, as if their hopes are pinned on someone, just as I always wanted someone to save me. In fact, the so-called sense of security is for yourself, and others can never really give it. Just like an impetuous thought, to be calm, you must find your own exit.

Many things cannot be fundamentally solved, or there is no ability and method to solve them for the time being, and the rest is a period. If you can't find a safe exit, you will get sick again and again. If you are sick, others may be just a temporary comfort medicine. If you are addicted, you will keep looking.

Christ said that what belongs to Satan belongs to Satan, and what belongs to God belongs to God. What belongs to us is ours.

Key home page

The house is finally closed, with a key in hand and a heavy heart. I have my own nest.

Actually, I never like to bring my keys. When I was young, my parents always held the keys. When I go home, the door is always open, so I don't need to bring my key at all. Even if there is no one at home, I will always find my parents somewhere. Or you can't find it, there are always places to go, such as grandma's house and grandma's house. Anyway, there will always be a door open for me.

Of course, there are times when they quarrel, and there are times when they go out to play at home. In the dark night, everyone is closed. I can only knock on the door with my sister's hand, but there is still no light in the room. Even once, I could only snuggle up with my sister at home. It was a winter night, and the cold was unforgettable. I will never forget it. To this end, I kept a lot of resentment in my heart until one day, these things melted a little, but even so, these fragments still could not dissipate in my heart.

After graduating from primary school, I began to live on campus and go home once a week. Keys, it's even more useless to take with me, and I don't like to take them. After junior high school, senior high school continues to live on campus and goes home once a month. For a while, maybe it was a rebellious period. I had a quarrel with my mother and didn't go back for three months. So for home, my mother always says that's just where I want money.

Then I went to college and went home once every six months. Because of the distance, the farther away from home, the more I miss it, especially when I am in a bad state and encounter setbacks. Go home for a few days and don't tell anyone what happened to you. After two days of silence, you can save some energy and continue walking. Of course, staying at home for a long time can be boring. After all, she is her own child. After a long time, her mother will start nagging, so she wants to leave home.

I took part in the work and began to wander and wander. Home is of special significance to me, although I always think that home belongs to them, and I can't spend the rest of my life here with them. Home is because of childhood, grandmother, mother and relatives. Once a year, no matter how far away, friends and relatives around you have to go back. Although the taste of Chinese New Year is getting weaker and weaker, home is always warm with people who miss you.

After working for several years, I also changed a lot of jobs, rented a house by myself, took a key from the landlord and lived in someone else's house. I dress up other people's homes warmly, but when I change my job, I have to move, and I always feel like I'm floating. Those places do not belong to me. I also took the company key, but many companies, not everyone, can take the key. It's the responsibility to get the key. If the key is missing, you are responsible for being on call and opening the door at any time. Everyone has a key, so it's of little use if you don't work overtime. At most, it is an emergency, and most of them are just hanging keys, which is a decoration.

But anyway, I don't like to bring my keys. Hanging them around your waist always feels like the behavior of middle-aged men. Hanging them around my neck makes a collar. I put them in my pocket. Fortunately, I still have a carry-on bag. I don't have many keys. I put them in, but only a little more weight. At most, it is to grind the schoolbag.

None of these keys are mine. The final result is either returned or invalidated, and it is useless to leave it in your hand, but it has become a tool for remembrance.

Now, these keys in my hand are mine, and so is the decorated home. Wherever I go in the future, there is always a home waiting for me. When I walk in, it is my personal space, and I can do whatever I want.

The renovation has just begun. To tell the truth, I'm not as excited as others, and even a little tired. However, just because there is such a string of keys that belong to me, and because there is such a private space that belongs to me, I still have to cheer up.

It's home after all.

It turns out that Kirin is also poisonous.

1 When I called home, I felt the atmosphere was wrong. After talking for a long time, my mother told me that she was not feeling well. When the brain explodes, it explodes, so the worst thoughts rush in. So, I bought a ticket and went home overnight.

It's okay. It's okay to go home late at night. Going back for two days, the way back and forth is in a hurry. I have done a lot in two days, and it is worthwhile to go back when the right path has passed and the right person has seen it.

The pear tree in front of the door bears fruit and is covered with branches. Because pear trees are small and have many fruits, my mother supports them with bamboo poles. It's still warm at home, and it may be rare to come back several times a year, so I seem to be a guest, and my mother is busy inside and outside.

After staying at home for a long time, I feel very idle, have no work to do, have nothing to play with, and feel bored. But the moment I left home, I didn't feel happy, but I was a little sad. Looking at grandma standing at the intersection, I wonder how many days I have left to really be with her.

The National People's Congress, big heart, fly, she is still guarding the home.

Along the way, it was like aphasia, headphones were in my ear, music was playing, I didn't know what to sing, and the scenery outside the window was swept away.

But things always happen suddenly, which makes people unprepared. In fact, it is nothing more than meeting someone, remembering one thing, or meeting, separating, and holding a grudge. The world is wonderful and cruel, which makes people feel that everything around them is riddled with holes. The waves are rough and the undercurrent is surging. Just like the unicorn on my desk, its fat dark green appearance and its juice are actually poisonous.

People in the past are gone, and people who miss them are everywhere. I didn't feel how stupid I was until the day I gave up. Who is waiting for you and who is worth waiting for?

And I, besides the health of my loved ones, shouldn't expect too much.

Next stop, where am I going? God knows, maybe you won't know until you walk by. But sometimes I understand that it's already 10 thousand years after my death, and I'm melodramatic, let alone sick.

I'd better not mention it.

What are you sad about?

Hearing Vitas's inhuman voice yesterday touched my sensitive nerves. When I settled down to listen to music, I thought a lot. Sadness flooded in and I struggled to sink to the bottom.

I have always had a special interest in that pale and weak face, sinking into a clean and shy smile. I like that kind of asymmetrical love, and I like that kind of warm, decadent and persistent words that save me. Such things always attract me at the first time, and then slowly penetrate my body and mind. Wet, you can squeeze it out when you are alone.

Later, life changed me. Knowing your mistakes means correcting them. It doesn't matter in performance, but there will always be sadness in my heart at some point.

I don't want to be immersed in a person's world, so I always say to myself, why are you so sad? Everyone has the shadow of childhood, and we can't blame our parents. Didn't that environment make you stand on your own feet since you were a child? Who doesn't have growing pains? If you think too much, you will know how to reflect. Who hasn't experienced the disaster of love? Only in this way can we know how to cherish. You are healthy, clear-headed, and have a face that many people find beautiful. You are happier than many people.

What are you still sad about?

In fact, sadness is just an emotion, which is deeply hidden in your heart and should be just a source of constant reflection. At that time, I didn't understand, and I was just uncomfortable and depressed. Now, I am grateful for everything in my life. There is always suffering. You should be glad that you have already experienced it. Reflect early and you will make progress.

Actually, I should be very happy. As we grew older, our parents began to love each other. More importantly, how much they love their children. That heavy love is always accompanied by every step of growth. When I was young, who had no blood and rebelled? However, their love is not a little less. Those friends who shuttled through my life made me understand a lot of truth. Although it is sometimes at the cost of loss, how can we cherish what we have now without experiencing separation and pain? The scars of growth will also become the wealth of later life.

When I got up in the morning, I told myself that it was another day. When I have a toothache, I tell myself that I should avoid eating sweets. When you are tired of exercising at night, tell yourself that if you stick to it, your figure will be great. When you feel poor, look at the new house opposite, which is also a home. When I went to bed at night, I said, it's good to have another full day.

Yes, why are you so sad? Even if I am sad, I should remind myself that this is a moment of far-reaching significance to me, in my heart.