2. I like your avatar so much, why do you bring the last two words?

The deadly summer is coming. If anyone can install air conditioning in our classroom, we will marry the head teacher.

Never ask me to marry you. I'll say yes as soon as I do.

5. Some things don't need to be wrangling, seemingly obeying and secretly resisting.

6. I drown my sorrows in wine, but I learned to swim in this damn pain.

7. Never give up, never leave in this life. If you don't like it, you will die.

8. God gave us worldly desires, but we turned them into pornography and violence.

9. Me Before You, my world is black and white. After meeting you, wow! It's all black ...

10. In today's society, people have to queue up to cut in line.

1 1. A threesome must have my wife. Choose the beautiful one.

12. Poor Nike, Fuadi, rogue Armani.

13. The most brilliant moment of Apple was hitting Newton on the head.

14. I don't need you to understand. Shut up.

15. The flower of the motherland, I stepped on one when it was in bloom.

16. If the teacher didn't say don't litter, I would throw you out.

17. Stupid or not, see if you can play dumb.

18. Stealing food is not my fault, but the loneliness of my mouth.

19. People in China can regard all festivals as Valentine's Day except Tomb-Sweeping Day!

20. I sometimes wonder if I am too fat to enter your heart.

2 1. Every time I watch you eat pork, I feel very sad. The same root and the same origin, what's the hurry?

22. Angered his wife again. It is no use apologizing. She turned around the house angrily: Hum! I want to buy something expensive! As soon as I heard it, it turned around! Spend money to eliminate disasters! Immediately say: good! I will go shopping with you. Then we went to the commodity market and bought a washboard. ...

I hate Qin Shihuang. He burned the book, but he didn't finish it.

24. I went to buy water, and the boss said two yuan. I said the suggested retail price is1.a bottle of 5 yuan. The boss said: I don't accept his suggestion!

25. If the school collapses, it will be sunny.

26. oh, my god If you can't make me thin! Just make my friend fat!

27. The girl made coke chicken wings for the boy. The boy tasted it and said it was delicious. The girl also took a bite and said, liar, I don't know him at all. The boy said softly, fool, everything you do is delicious to me. A few days later, boys and girls died of bird flu. This story tells us that Hugh Ai En died quickly!

28. If we want to be demoted to Sri Lanka, we must first turn off its mobile phone, stop its traffic, steal its account and unplug its network cable, so as to bid farewell to scum and become a schoolmaster.

29. Bathing in summer is like washing vegetables for mosquitoes.

30. Going out this summer is going into the oven, walking is spicy, sitting is teppanyaki, or when the rain stops, it becomes boiled fish.

3 1. Suddenly found that Huo Qubing and Xin Qiji are lovers' names.

32. A person sitting in a car worth tens of millions doesn't feel happy at all. The driver drove all the way, and I was not interested in enjoying the scenery along the way. I have a lot of thoughts and thoughts: what is people living for? Is wealth that important? Which is more important to a country, democracy or GDP? When will the rule of law be realized? Are you too hasty? I was meditating and looked up: Damn, the high-speed train missed its stop again. ...

33. These days, no puppy love, no meanness, no cheating, no rebellion, no copying homework, no playing mobile phone, no one believes that you are a student.

34. The teacher confiscated my game machine, and when I returned it to me at the end of the term, I found that the games were all cleared.

35. I think we should be friendly to strangers, such as financial insurance, English training, study abroad services, sex hotels, matchmaking agencies, sales of infertility products and questionnaires. I always answer the phone with my ex-boyfriend's name and address patiently and kindly.

36. Meat, meat, don't rush your legs and chest if you can!

37. Time is like cleavage. Squeeze, there will always be!

I want to be a man and marry a good woman like me in my next life.

39. Parent-teacher conferences, like mistresses, are destructive to family harmony!

40. Once, I asked a courier what he was, and he said you could do anything. I sent you a courier for half a year, and you still ask me what it is? People are rhyme rhyme rhyme rhyme rhyme rhyme rhyme rhyme rhyme rhyme rhyme rhyme rhyme!

4 1. After constipation, Dr. Chen made me a course of electric drill.

42. In the class of the head teacher, the deskmate sleeps on the table. The head teacher was furious and winked at me. I understood at once, and then took off my coat and put it on my deskmate. What a considerate class teacher!

43. Q: Have you ever cried for women? A: I cried. Q: Who? A: My mother was beaten until she cried herself hoarse.

44. The electric fan is man's best friend. I asked the electric fan if I was ugly. The fan shook its head silently all night.

45. With my face value, in ancient times, I could support the whole brothel! You mean you look like a pillar?

46. A neighbor, a 4-year-old Zheng Tai Jr. She goes to kindergarten and loses stationery at school all day. His father was angry that day: you lost it for a day and didn't bring it back … As a result, the next day when I got home, I dumped a bunch of pencils and notebooks on the sofa …

47. My best friend has been coming to my house for dinner these days, and every time she eats very little, I asked: Why don't you eat more? Girlfriend: Every time I lose weight and can't control my mouth, I want to go to your house for dinner. After all, no one cooks like you. You don't want to eat the second bite after eating the first bite. Me: Get out! ...

48. Life is boring, but fortunately I am cute.

49.what are you doing? I'm looking in the mirror. Why do you close your eyes? I'm watching me sleep.

50. Time and tide wait for no man. First of all, women are not spared. Opportunity waits for no man. First of all, you can't wait for a man.

5 1. Love sometimes feels like being drunk. Clear-headed, but out of control.

52. Don't say forever, don't say forever. Who can promise the future? All we can grasp is the local feelings at that time. But life is made up of countless now, and every moment is forever.

53. Study hard for China! A pack of China cigarettes is a lot of money!

54. In a harmonious campus, cyclists may be doctors, and Mercedes-Benz drivers may be logistics personnel.

55. The next morning, the bride walked out of the bridal chamber in pain, holding the wall with one hand and covering her nakedness with the other, cursing: liar! What a liar! Before I got married, I said I had thirty years' savings. I thought it was money!

56. Cherish the dark-looking person around you, because one day a coal mine truck passes by, and you may never see him again.

57. Bill Gates wants to save money to buy a Lamborghini, 1 second, 2 seconds, 3 seconds, 4 seconds, 5 seconds, haha enough. Li Ka-shing wants to save money to buy a Bolankini, 1 hour, 2 hours, 3 hours, 4 hours, 5 hours, haha enough. The local richest man wants to save money to buy a Bolankini, 1 month, 2 months, 3 months, 4 months, 5 months, that's enough. I want to save money to buy a Bolankini, 1 life, 2 lives, 3 lives. . .

58. Don't ask me what I missed. I miss someone now.

I am in a bad mood today. I just want to say four sentences, including the first two. I quit.

60. Heroes don't ask for a way out, hooligans don't look at their age!

6 1. It takes thousands of years to change from a monkey to a human, and only one bottle of wine is needed to change from a human to a monkey.

62. You fish and people will eat you.

63. Men conquer women by conquering the world! Women conquer the world by conquering men!

64. The unfairness of this world lies in: God said: I want light! So there was this day. The beauty said: I want a diamond ring! So she bought a diamond ring. The rich man said: I want a woman! So he had a woman. I said: I want to take a shower! I can't believe the water was cut off.

No one has stepped on my head since I turned into shit.

66. Boss, have a bowl, tears streaming down your face.

67. The rich are afraid that others will know that he has money, while the poor are afraid that others will know that he has no money.

68. Advertising is to tell others that his money can still be spent like this.

69. I asked her, "Have you ever had a boyfriend before?" She said, "I had it in high school." I know perfectly well past ask, "Are you from Henan?" She was frightened: "with men, of course!" "

70. Male: Outside the Qingshan Building outside the mountain, love and marriage are free. Woman: Wanshui Qian Shan is just idle and in no hurry to make money.

7 1. I am a civilized person, and all the dirty words have been disinfected with saliva.

72. If I die, my first sentence is: I don't have to be afraid of ghosts at last.

There are three wishes in life: one is to eat, the other is to sleep, and the third is to laugh.

74. I am in Jianghu, but there are no legends about me in Jianghu.

75. When men and women flirt, the most striking Chinese character is born: bump.

76. I knew he was a bad guy, but I forgot to say it.

77. Turning girls into women is the most basic responsibility and obligation of men.

78. Women don't care about decency, decency is because there is not enough temptation, men don't care about loyalty, and loyalty is because the chips of betrayal are too low.

79. You, you, you little leprechaun, poisoned me with your love poison but didn't give me the antidote! Little villain! Oh, I'm dying! Help me! The solution is simple: give me your love!

80. Love without pain is not true love, and marriage without happiness is a sad marriage.

8 1. Wearing Hengyuanxiang's sweater, carrying a gift box of melatonin, holding three refined calcium gluconate in hand and Taiji chicken juice syrup in hand is a performance art that many people go to.

82. When I grow up, I will marry Tang Yan as my husband. I will play if I can, but I won't eat him.

83. Don't read what you shouldn't, don't say what you shouldn't say, don't listen to what you shouldn't hear, and don't think about what you should do.

84. Don't talk to me about feelings. Talking about feelings hurts money.

85. I have done two things wrong in my life, one is to live and the other is to live.

86. We are just passers-by, playing group games here. Whether you lose or I win, we will play games together in the end!

Don't pose in front of me, I'm afraid I can't help but want to drop my camera.

88. Break up with you because you don't deserve to hold hands!

89. One day, San Xiao cried because San Xiao appeared!

90. God gave us worldly desires, but we turned them into pornography and violence.

9 1. Don't you know that you always dream about what I'm doing and I'm busy?

92. When I felt deeply inferior to my appearance, I thought, it's okay. When I am rich, I am destined to be everyone's. When I have money, I will go for plastic surgery. The doctor looked at me and said that money can't solve all problems.

93. Come to school early every day, seemingly loving learning, but a few people know that we are here to copy our homework.

94. Eating food is kind, because you just want to eat every day and have no time to calculate others.

95. He broke up with me. I just wanted to reply, but he said it was sent to the wrong person.

96. What's your specialty? My boiled water is not bad

97. Since childhood, has anyone remembered it, which made your heart bittersweet? Yes, it's the uncle who sells candied haws at my door.

98. A beautiful sister paper asked me: Hi, do you have a girlfriend? I said excitedly, no way, sister paper picked up the skirt and turned around and said, do you think it looks good? My heart beat faster and I said, beautiful. Sister paper went on to say: well, I think so, too. My boyfriend gave it to me.

99. Some people say that it is easy to have an accident when walking and playing with a mobile phone. Lying in the trough scared me to start running and playing.

100. Sometimes you don't work hard and don't even know what despair is.