1. If you don't skin a tree, you will die. People are shameless and invincible in the world. 2. Sao belongs to Sao, and Sao has Sao chastity; Cheap return to cheap, cheap dignity, 3, years old appearance, 1 years old every day up. 2-year-old dreams, 3-year-old hard work. At the age of 4, he is basically oriented, and at the age of 5, he eats incense everywhere. Playing mahjong at the age of 6, wandering around at the age of 7. 8-year-old lesbians are common, and 9-year-old lesbians are hanging on the wall! 4. When you were born, you cried and everyone laughed. When you left, you were smiling, and everyone was crying. 5. Stand higher and pee farther. 6. In a few decades, we will meet again and send them to the crematorium, all of which will be burned to ashes. You are a pile, I am a pile, and no one knows anyone. All of them will be sent to the countryside to make chemical fertilizer. 7. I met a MM personality signature: I can't play chess and painting, and I am tired of washing and cooking. 8. I met a GG signature: Give me a girl and I can create a nation. 9. I met an old Shaanxi personality signature: ugly women are more troublesome, and black buns are more vegetables. 1. I met our teacher's signature: I tell you that the teacher is very angry now, and the consequences are very serious (after his nth blind date failed). 11. I met a writer's signature: maybe it seems to be probably, but it may not be. 12. I met a lover's signature: what I said can be counted, and the person I like has to change it every day. 13. When I met the sleeping king in my class, I signed my personality: three full meals in the morning, three full meals in the evening, and six full meals before and after meals. 14. that we wished to fly in heaven, two birds with the wings of one is willing to be a pig in the same circle! 15. Don't worry, I don't even have an appetite when I see you, and I still talk about sexual desire! 16, chopped up-do you want a piece? 17. If the morning comes later, I think I will like it. 18. I can't give you happiness, but I can give you comfort! 19. Life is so fucking fun, because life always fucking plays with me. 2. Buddha said: "It took 5 times to look back in the past life to get a pass in this life." I would rather pass by once in the world for 5 times in this life. 21, I want to puppy love, but it's already late ... 22, dear! My clothes have lost weight again. 23. Don't speak English in front of me in the future, OK? 24, how far is the thought, how far do you roll for me 25, hooligans are not terrible, I am afraid that hooligans have culture. 26, the guest officer, please respect yourself, the little girl only sells herself and doesn't busk. 27. A man's lies can lie to a woman for one night, and a woman's lies can lie to a man for a lifetime! 28, water can carry a boat, but also can cook porridge! 29. Zi said in Sichuan, "How nice it is to have a boat!" 3, wanted a small MM,*** with irrigation; I irrigate the head of the Yangtze River and you irrigate the tail of the Yangtze River. 31, love at first sight, then decline, three exhausted. 32. A person is not alone, but only when he misses someone. 33. Life is easy. Live, easy. Life is not easy. 34, work QQ, decline to chat, if you want to talk strongly, every word is hairy; Punctuation, half price, more than 1, words, 2% discount; Emoticons, ten monthly subscriptions, audio and video, not yet available; Chat after the first payment, chat as soon as the payment arrives, pay online and provide invoices; Free of monthly rent, single charge, double holidays, business as usual; Looking for an agent, 35. If there is a problem, look for the reason from yourself first. Don't blame the earth for not having gravity when you are constipated. 36. knit me a scarf, and I will repay you with my lifelong care. Otherwise, you can strangle me with a scarf! 37. Men pretend to understand when they don't understand, but women are just the opposite. 38. In order to cooperate with the successful completion of family planning work in China this year, I decided not to contact friends of the opposite sex for the time being. Thank you for your cooperation. 39. Spring scenery can't be caged, so I pulled an apricot out of the wall. 4. Do you think I will watch you die? I will close my eyes. 41. I thought I was decadent. Today, I realized that my morning paper was scrapped. 42. I drank to drown my pain, but this damn pain learned to swim. 43. Everyone else is pretending to be serious, so I have to pretend not to be serious. 44. An elephant asked the camel,' Why do your boobs grow on your back?' The camel said,' Stay away from death, I don't talk to things with dicks on my face! 45. You should do three important things for the people of the whole country: install an elevator for Mount Everest, tile the Great Wall and put the plane in reverse gear. Three small things: wear a mask for mosquitoes, gloves for flies, and condoms for cockroaches. 46. My wife is an operating system, but it is very troublesome to install and uninstall; Small secret is the desktop, you can change it every day as long as you are interested; The lover is the internet, and the scenery is infinite and the money is constantly spent; Miss is pirated software, remember to kill virus first when using it! 47. Have you heard? It took 5 times to look back in the previous life for this life to pass by. In this life, good friends like us, in the previous life ... did nothing but turn back! 48. I am 2 years old, everyone loves me, flowers bloom, and cars have a flat tire! I know astronomy and geography above, but I know little about it below. Every time I walk outside, I often lead beautiful women back, and handsome men jump off buildings! 49. I want to send you roses, but the price is too expensive; I want to comfort you, but I haven't learned it yet; I want to kneel down to you, but the ring is still in the insurance cabinet. 5. Love is empty, and I am wandering in the street; People are empty and money is empty, and single bad karma is working; Things are empty and industries are empty, and they go crazy when they think about it; The mobile phone is empty and has no money to charge, and life is not easy; In short, all four are empty. 6, there is a fart, bad heart; No fart, exercise; I'm going to fart, attention, everyone. When the fart sounds, clap your hands! Yan Zhenyu (33261126) 15: 32: 49 61. Copy books, make sentences and write compositions-children's affairs are done by adults. Boundless love boating for a bosom friend ―― Adult's business and children's business. Perm your hair and wear fancy clothes ―― Women's business is men's business. 62. The early bird catches the worm, and the early worm is eaten by the bird! 63. arguing with MM about whether a whale is a fish or not, I finally said, "I also bring a personal word", and she agreed that a whale is not a fish. 64. I heard that women are like clothes and brothers are like brothers. Looking back, I actually ran naked in too many cooks for 2 years! 65. Wear other people's shoes, go your own way, and let them find it by taxi. 66. There is an old legend that people who can see beautiful women on XX campus will live forever ... 67. They are not afraid of enemies like tigers, but afraid of teammates like pigs! 68. When the water is clear, there is no fish, and when people are mean, they are invincible! 69. I am not a casual person. I am not a casual person. 7. Today, a group of Japanese people came to visit our school-to be honest, this is the first time I have seen Japanese people in clothes! 71. I am poor, so are my servants, my gardener and my driver ... 72. When the bank charges, it says, "This is in line with international practice!" When serving, he said, "We should consider China's national conditions!" 73, riding a white horse is not necessarily a prince, he may be a Tang priest; The one with wings is not necessarily an angel, he may be a bird. 74. Being pregnant is like being pregnant. It takes a long time for people to see it. 79. I swallowed an aphrodisiac and the world immediately became sexy ~ 8. If falling in love is falling in love, isn't that hooliganism? 81. The sentence "Japanese are human" belongs to: a. Metaphor; B. exaggeration; C. metonymy; D. personification 82. Grandpa came from his grandson ... 85. Why do you pretend to be alcohol when you are all water? Why do you pretend to be sheep when you are all perverts! 86, all unforgettable love is the moment when the soul is free in bed ~ 87, Ninja Turtle said: "If you want to live a decent life, you have to bring some green on your back!" 88. I sleep on my stomach, which makes me strong on the earth, and I sleep on my back, which makes me strong on the whole universe! 9. When the night is turned on the bed again during the day, the sun is born ... 91. There are only two kinds of men: one is lewd, and the other is very lewd! 91. ① Teacher, just follow the old woman ... ② The old woman was rude, and it's your turn ~ ③ Teacher, please spare the old woman! (4) Anituo Buddha, I can't shoot the old woman -_-b 94. Life raped me, and I castrated my life ... 95. According to the time law of hormonal activities, I came to the conclusion that morning exercises are not as good as morning exercises! 96. God, did you let summer and winter share a room? Give birth to this damn weather! 97. Don't hang yourself on a tree, and try to die several times in a few nearby trees ~ 98. Ma Huateng said privately, "It's not good to learn Chinese for ten years without talking about QQ for half a year!" 99. Leave half when defecating, so as not to get hungry quickly ~ 12. On how romantic fairy tales men tell women, there is only one word in it: bed.