Now that I'm out of social work, my work is always in trouble. When I am a draftsman, I need a master to sit next to me and let me draw line by line, so that I won't make mistakes. I really feel too timid and want to find a hole to get into. When I was working in a tea factory, I always put the boxes in the wrong specifications, but I didn't know I was wrong when I put them in. My superiors were angry when they pointed it out, and I suddenly realized. Now as a bonsai maintenance worker, I often forget to turn off the tap after watering. Sometimes I look at my watch. When I first put it in my pocket, if someone asks me what time it is, I can't answer it, which even makes me feel too exaggerated ... but if I have a bad memory, it seems to be wronged, because I have many childhood things, even a sentence and an action, but I can remember them clearly, just like. Later, I finally found the reason-because I was always thinking, thinking all day, and my brain was overtired. Because I was absent-minded when I was doing things. I always think about my past and that I don't feel at home now. I have been immersed in the past, immersed in troubles. At first, I thought about my experiences, misfortunes and troubles all day, and gradually I .. It became a machine that could never stop, and I always thought about it. Later, I thought about everything, big and small, meaningful and meaningless, absurd and not absurd. I want to think explosively, so I can't always do things well ... whenever I quit my job for my whimsy and look for a new job for my fantasy, I'm really confused ... I really can't find one in this world. No matter where I go or what job I do, the result is the same, but changing jobs is not the way! I often wonder what is the meaning of my life, and I often want to end myself, but I feel helpless and helpless, and I feel too weak. I can't leave the mess to others, and I can't bear to disappoint my friends, classmates and relatives. Although my home (not home) is terrible, one or two classmates are very kind to me, and my aunt is also very kind to me. I can't disappoint them. I feel too weak. There are too many people who suffer more than me. But why do people always smile and be happy? Why can't I? I don't know if I still have hope, but I must try to know. At least if I really can't hold on, I will die willingly and with a clear conscience. Miss Yang, can you help me? -Rain Curtain Rain Curtain: Hello! You said, "I don't know why I'm always thinking. I'll always think, whether it's meaningful or meaningless." It's too complicated and chaotic, just like dreaming of one irregular scene after another ... "I think your brain is normal. This is because our brains are like hearts. As long as we live, they can't stop beating and thinking. Believe it or not, their brains are always thinking, so I say your brain is normal. Here you may ask, since my brain is normal, why do I have various situations that affect my work and life? That's a good question, and it's also the key to your question. It's just like a student listening to a class. In order to improve the effect of class, he asked himself not to let go of every word the teacher said, asked himself not to be distracted for a moment, and always warned himself: "Don't be distracted!" As a result, the whole class was spent on controlling distraction. After a class, the teacher didn't listen to what he said at all, which made people more anxious and controlled themselves more strictly. As a result, the actual effect of class is getting worse and worse. You have already experienced this situation, and you will know it as soon as I say it. What should we do in this situation? First of all, we should realize that the thinking of the brain is its normal function. Since it is a normal function, we don't need to care, let alone deliberately control it. As long as you don't care, just accept it with a calm mind and say to yourself with a relaxed mind: "Just think about it, it's no big deal!" Secondly, when you can't stop thinking repeatedly, the most important thing at this time is to find ways to divert your attention and get rid of the reality of thinking repeatedly as soon as possible. For example, once you can't stop thinking about other things, do something you are interested in or listen to music immediately. At this time, you may forget the relevant scenes and stop thinking. Third, rain or shine, people have joys and sorrows. Nothing can be perfect, so there are incomplete beauty, tortuous beauty and so on. Therefore, we may face obstacles, setbacks and even unexpected mistakes every day. Of course, when we try our best, we should not be too hard on ourselves. Being too demanding of our own achievements can only make us feel disappointed and failed, thus losing confidence. Fourth, find what you like and are most willing to do. When you put your heart and soul into it, your problems will disappear. Fifth, enrich your spare time, such as participating in sports and entertainment activities, listening to music, dancing and singing. When you are busy, your mood is no longer depressed and you will feel relaxed. Once you make enriching your spare time a habit, your problem will be solved. Sixth, make your work as procedural and standardized as possible. The so-called "programming" means processing according to certain steps; And "specification" is to deal with it according to certain regulations. For example, if you are a bonsai maintainer now, then we will design a program step according to what we have done, and then follow this step, so that we will not make mistakes when we get used to it over time. Seventh, actively communicate with others. When interpersonal relationships are harmonious, let more people understand and support you, so that you can dilute or eliminate your concerns in harmony and care and get rid of "thinking". Use some calm and relaxed sentences to hint at yourself-"I live in a safe environment", "I am happy in this environment" and "everything about me is relaxed and happy", instead of denying or posting some negative comments. At the same time, I use my inner language to motivate myself: "I am great", "I performed well" and "everyone likes me very much". This will help to improve your present situation. Finally, adjust living conditions. Actively participate in various cultural and sports activities, so that boring daily life becomes rich and colorful; When you can't stop thinking repeatedly, you can take a deep breath and relax (inhale slowly for a long time). You can imagine your lungs as a balloon, and you want to fill it as much as possible. When you feel that the balloon has been completely inflated, it means that it has sunk into the abdomen, and keep it for two seconds. Then, exhale gently and slowly. Inhale for four seconds and exhale for four seconds. You can breathe for a few seconds. In order to slow down the speed, we can make some changes in the method of counting seconds, and change "one second" into "one thousandth", which can basically reduce the speed to a number of about one second. When you start inhaling, your mind starts to calculate: "one thousandth, two thousandths, three thousandths, four thousandths". You must keep inhaling until you count to "four thousandths" and then exhale in the same way. ), or imagine relaxation (imagine relaxation method is to achieve the purpose of physical and mental relaxation by imagining some peaceful, soothing and pleasant scenes. You should try your best to see its shape, listen to its sound, smell its taste and feel its softness with all your senses ... just like you have experienced it yourself. For example, you can imagine walking on the endless prairie. In the late spring afternoon, the sun sets and the afterglow sets each other off. When you step on the soft grass, weeds, flowers and the fresh smell of the country come to your nose, birds are singing and butterflies are flying. You are there, and the breeze caresses your face, just like the gentle touch of my mother when I was a child; Bathed in soft light, just like parents told them when they left home; The high sky and distant mountains make you feel relaxed and happy. At this time, you stretch your whole body and take a deep breath slowly, feeling extremely relaxed and comfortable. )。 In this way, you can get rid of other thoughts and be calm, so as to relax and stop thinking about all kinds of things. These are just some of my suggestions. I believe that it can help you to alleviate or eliminate repeated thinking. Your friend Yang Yonglong wishes you to get out of the present situation as soon as possible and integrate into life healthily and happily! Miss Yang: Hello! Thank you for taking time out of your busy schedule to reply to my letter and answer my questions. In fact, before this, I went to several hospitals and posted them online, including the psychological consultation telephone number of CCTV Psychological Interview these days. The result is that ... some doctors in the hospital said I was neurasthenia, while others said I was neurotic. As a result, I took several drugs and didn't respond. Many doctors do this. As soon as they sat down, they bowed their heads and wrote prescriptions without even looking at you. Anyway, those doctors. Of the three people who called the TV station, two numbers did not exist, and one was never answered. You are the first person who is willing to write back to me. Thank you very much It has been several days since you answered my letter. I'm really sorry to reply to you until now, because the boss who came out to surf the Internet was unhappy and had to wait for him to go on a business trip. Well, I really don't know how to say it. I know the boss is doing me good, and I'm afraid I'm addicted, but I really don't like being bound like this. I seem to have returned to the cat-and-mouse life with my father when I was a child. I know that surfing the Internet has many disadvantages, but it also has many advantages, depending on how you surf the Internet. Besides, not everyone is addicted to playing games. Your suggestions are very good, such as "divert your attention", "don't be hard on yourself", "regulate your work as much as possible" and "actively communicate with others", which is very helpful for me to change the status quo and get rid of my delusion. But I found that my problems are complicated in many aspects. I analyzed them, mainly because I can't get out of the shadow of the past, and I am autistic, timid, inferior, cowardly and weak-willed. "I feel tired for a reason, not for no reason. When I was very young, I wondered why people always bullied me. My family beat me, others beat me, children bullied me, and adults bullied me. When I get older, I wonder why other people's parents are so kind to me, why dad is so fierce, doesn't care about us, doesn't like being with us, keeps us at home all day, doesn't give us freedom and doesn't let us go out to play. When I was studying, I wondered why everyone else could read so well, but I couldn't, why I was so stupid that I couldn't win honor for my family and father, why others didn't like being with me, and why I was always alone. Now I wonder, why is my brother so disappointing? He didn't even learn to cook for five or six years. Why is his salary of 1000 yuan a month not enough? Why do you want to take money from me to pay the rent and buy a pair of shoes? Why do you want to take money from me when he goes home without travelling expenses? He is still single. What should I do when he has a family in the future? I wonder why his father's ideas are so backward and absurd. Why do people hate his son and I hate my father? Why is he so lazy, so irresponsible, so selfish and so depraved? Why do I always make a mess of my work? Why can't I control my thoughts, my emotions and my desire to eat hard and vent my emotions? Why do I look so stupid, so stupid, so idiot, so incredible ... I think you are right when you say that I demand too much of myself. Actually, I'm too greedy. Learn comics, art signatures, computers, communication ... I want to work, my career, my family, the present, the past and the future ... I want to learn everything, as if I want to learn all the knowledge in the world at once, but I can't do anything well. Just like I go to the library to read books, I still have to look around to see if there is anything better. You also suggested that I actively associate with others. In fact, I really want to look forward to it, but I really can't. My expression is really stiff ... people are afraid of it. I don't know why I can't find a topic to talk about. When I was about to graduate from college, I was doing my graduation project one day. I wanted to enter the classroom, and I met the department secretary at the door (he also taught us). I want to say hello to him, but I dare not look him in the eye. I just stole a look at him. At this moment, he just looked at me. I hurriedly turned away in a panic. He probably thought I gave him a dirty look, so I was angry. At the graduation party, I summoned up the courage to propose a toast to the teacher. Ignore me, maybe he still hates me ... I have a lot of problems, which may not be easy to change, or there is no way to change, but you have helped me a lot. I will try my best to do what you suggested and try my best to change myself unless I really have no choice ... Thank you! -Rain Curtain Rain Curtain: Hello! I fully understand your experience, because there are many similarities between my childhood and yours. During the Cultural Revolution, my father was classified as an "active counter-revolutionary" and was often planted, beaten and humiliated by classmates for no reason. Ironically, donkey, son of a bitch, counter-revolution has been with me almost all the time, and I have been tortured. At the thought of these, even I, a man who has entered the age of no doubt, will shed tears, not to mention that it is normal for children who have just left college and are about to experience complex social situations. This is because you have just stepped into the society and don't know much about the unique soul of society and individuals. Plus, you constantly deny and get rid of your normal psychology, and you are not confident about the future, so you will often think of the past. In fact, "the past itself didn't hurt us", but it was our memories that hurt us. Psychosociologists point out that life is impermanent, but a blessing in disguise is a blessing in disguise, and many times suffering may be a good thing, which can increase people's ability to surpass themselves, that is, increase wisdom. Many of us mistakenly associate the painful experiences of childhood with the problems of adulthood. In fact, many people become active and healthy after experiencing disasters at any stage of their lives, which is the result of seeking help and positive adjustment in time when they find themselves in a bad situation. Friendly feelings and good mentality can not only help people get rid of suffering, but also make people stronger and more self-surpassing. So I told you in my last letter that you should make friends first, gain empathy and love in harmonious communication with friends, and let yourself move towards happiness, joy, joy and love in a warm and pleasant environment. Or make full use of your good friends and tell them your confusion, distress and depression (of course, you can also keep a diary). They will certainly help you out of your confusion, distress and depression, and then resolve or eliminate your "thinking all day" mood. People's consciences accumulate like garbage in a dustbin, which will spread like smoke and infringe on the soul. Once you pour it out, it will look relaxed, cheerful and happy. Secondly, you should understand that "life is a process of constant injury and self-repair." "It is also a process of improving psychological adaptability and maturing in the process of continuous injury and self-repair. A philosopher once said, "The greatness of man lies in his ability to smile at life and life after the most cruel blow!"! "In the course of life, contradictions and pains are intertwined, full of pursuits and hardships, full of thorns and bumps. Life is a halo, full of hardships, hardships, hardships and setbacks. Every time we overcome difficulties and setbacks, we will add a bright pearl to our life, and our life will also add many colors. Therefore, I don't know how many hardships and setbacks I have to go through in my life. Only after experiencing difficulties and obstacles can we more appreciate the beauty of life and the beauty of life. Third, transfer emotions. This is a way for individuals to actively avoid and restrain conflict emotions. In the face of bad emotions caused by dissatisfaction, you can move them away by "accepting or not accepting". In other words, we can avoid the oncoming emotional distress, not think about it, not accept it, but do what we usually want to do, such as listening to music, playing football, playing basketball and so on. Fill our time with pleasant activities and make use of the passage of time. Transfer is about the transformation of time and space-the troubles encountered here and now should be lifted at that time and place; Transfer also talks about psychological transfer. When you encounter troubles that are hard to get rid of, don't think about it and don't strengthen your emotions. It's that you take your thoughts away and use positive emotions to offset negative emotions. According to your specific situation, when you feel that you are entangled in painful memories, take the initiative to participate in group activities such as sports and entertainment. With the intensification of physiological function and blood circulation, people's psychology will also be open, which is more conducive to your venting of bad emotions. Of course, after harmonious interpersonal relationships, more people will understand and support you, so that they can dilute or eliminate painful memories in harmony and care. Fourth, self-suggestion and aversion to painful memories. When you have painful memories, you can keep repeating in your mind "This is the psychological garbage I must get rid of", "I live in the present, and the past will not affect me", "I shouldn't have painful memories", "Painful memories are harmful" and "I hate painful memories" and so on. This kind of repeated meditation can overcome the problem of painful memory. Psychologists have proved that if you hate it psychologically, you will give it up with the psychological changes of your ideas and actions. Fifth, face up to reality. You are now a person who joined the work after graduating from college, which shows that you are not what you used to be. For what happened when you were a child, only you turned over those old running accounts, and others generally didn't care too much. In the words of modern writer Yan Ji, "there is no need to regret what is lost, but every minute of existence should be burned to the fullest." "So, don't think so much about the past. It is most important to live well in the present and do well in the present. As long as you go beyond yourself and make corresponding life choices, then everyone will live in harmony with you, sharing weal and woe, and I believe you will have your own sunny day!

Don't think too much.

There is no point in asking such a question if you think too much.