Some parents say this:
"My child just went to the second grade of primary school. I always wanted to give my children a happy childhood, but I saw that other parents had enrolled their children in many cram schools. I'm anxious when I'm not idle on weekends. I'm worried that my children can't keep up with others. Just try to give him a few lessons. "
"I think children should learn more, which will be better for him in the future and enrich their spare time."
"You look at the neighbor's second-grade children. Now I am studying dance, music, art and table tennis. I can't let our children fall behind! "
......
In fact, there is nothing wrong with enrolling children in various classes. What is wrong is the mentality of parents.
First, the mistake lies in "from the heart"
Le Pen said: "It is one of the main characteristics of this era that group unconscious behavior replaces individual conscious behavior."
Adults buy things and live by the rules, but they can't raise children by the rules!
Personality and temperament are mostly innate, so every child is different.
Understand the child's personality type and find the one that suits him, instead of blindly following the trend. This is what parents should do.
Behind conformity is the impetuousness of parents. Parents often don't calm down and think, forget the original intention of doing things, and then follow the trend, and the burden on children is getting heavier and heavier.
Second, the mistake is "comparison"
Comparison is a common problem for adults. Don't impose comparison on children.
Now there is a vivid term to describe parents' mentality, which is called "running education".
This view of education is often despised because children have no room for free development in this mode, which also aggravates parents' sense of crisis and makes the social atmosphere tense, which obviously violates the law of education.
He doesn't know what comparison means, because children around the age of 9 still feel safe from their families, so he cares more about their concern.
It is terrible for parents to go to class with a comparison mentality and turn their children into tools to satisfy their desire to compare.
Seeing other people's children learn to draw, my children should also learn, and they can't be worse than others. My children are not as good at drawing as others and have to work overtime.
Parents are more likely to oppress their children, and children are more likely to form cowardice, evasion and obedience.
Third, the fault lies in "vanity"
Pope said: "vanity and glitz in life are like a river." The waves behind push forward, keep passing and keep coming in. "
It is more and more common to show off your baby in the circle of friends, and your child's small achievements are praised.
Parents show off their achievements, not for their children, but for their relatives and friends. This is vanity.
I enrolled my children in this class, and others may have seen that class, which shows my emphasis on children's education and my Excellence in children.
But is it really necessary to show off?
Sometimes your vanity may hurt children's feelings.
These three attitudes of parents come from their own feelings, rather than putting themselves in the children's shoes.
Many people feel that it is not necessary to apply for the second grade children, and there is always resistance.
In fact, it is necessary for us to change our concepts and enroll our children in cram schools.
First, cultivate children's interest as early as possible, and they will have a skill in the future.
Jia Pingwa said: "One can be ignorant, but not bored."
Parents are children's first pleasure. Interest should be discovered and cultivated from an early age.
In Gone with the Wind, Scarlett's love life is full of twists and turns, and everyone around her leaves her. She did not give up her life, but guarded Tara "Tara" left by her father.
Therefore, actively fighting for the interests of children is the best gift left by parents to their children.
Training courses are just a way to discover and tap their interests.
Second, expand social places and pay attention to happy childhood.
Anthony said: "The greatest wealth in life is the network, because it can open every door for the ability you need, so that you can continue to grow and contribute."
Children nowadays are very lonely. Unlike our old village, we have friends to play games with.
A cram school can provide a social place for children. Children can meet more classmates in the cram school, many of whom are like-minded friends.
The fun of childhood must be having some good friends to play with.
Socialization is very important for parents and children.
Good social communication can open a child's nature and make him generous, optimistic and friendly.
More contact with others can not only help us exchange parenting experiences, but also let children have their own game circles.
Third, let children fall in love with one thing and cultivate concentration and perseverance.
Sanel said: "As long as you continue to work hard and persevere, there is nothing you can't conquer." This fully shows the importance of cultivating a person's perseverance.
Children who don't want to learn don't give up easily.
The study in cram school tests children's learning ability and perseverance.
Therefore, parents should not scold their children, but encourage them to guide them.
Let children really fall in love with one thing and learn to persist slowly, which can exercise their brave and firm character.
Li Meijin said that children must learn to swim, because the process of learning to swim is the process of cultivating children's good character.
If parents take these as the starting point, it may not be a bad thing to report training classes to their children. Because parents know how to love their children correctly, how can children grow up better.
Cultivating children is not only to cultivate a "talent" with high ability and quality, but also to cultivate children's good character and quality. In fact, the cultivation of children's character should be more important than the cultivation of ability.
Tilly, an American philosopher, said: "To form a moral quality, we need both natural kindness and a good living environment." This proves the importance of cultivating children's good character.
A good personality will benefit you for life. You don't have to force him to do anything in the future, but he can take the initiative to learn and do it, which is also a good habit.
Therefore, in the early stage of children's growth, the focus of cram school should be to cultivate children's character and interest.
Never mind what the child has achieved, such as drawing well and doing well.
We should find children's interest in learning and cultivate their good qualities in interest.