Under what circumstances will you accept death? You think there's nothing wrong with dying. The following is what I recommend to you. Why do you think death is a temptation?

The prism of suicide

? Under what circumstances is suicide reasonable or even appropriate? Yale university professor Shelley? Kagan sat cross-legged on the lecture table in a plaid shirt and jeans, asking questions. In the penultimate lecture of his famous elective course Philosophy of Death, he asked the following students? Can we talk about suicide? . The video of this course was put on the online open class and received hundreds of millions of hits.

This reminds us of a sentence by Camus: there is only one really serious philosophical problem, and that is suicide. The Centre for Suicide Prevention of the Hong Kong Jockey Club of the University of Hong Kong believes that one suicide is enough. ? With this simple and clear sentence as the slogan, they are committed to stopping and reducing every suicide. This coincides with the goals of many institutions committed to suicide prevention.

There seem to be two? Suicide? . One is a more abstract philosophical discussion, and the other is an action to keep every fresh life. The former asks about the meaning of life and the elements of a better life through suicide, while the latter refuses to commit suicide to ensure it? Living is because living is happiness and the possibility of happiness. Think about it, two? Suicide? In fact, they all point to the same problem, that is, how to pursue happiness and a better life.

The report "Suicide in China in 2002 -20 1 1" by Ye, director of the Hong Kong Jockey Club Suicide Prevention Research Center, was released this year. According to the report, in the past decade, the average annual suicide rate in China has dropped to 9.8 per 65,438+10,000 people, a decrease of 58%. The decline is mainly in rural young women, and the suicide rate of middle-aged men has not decreased with the overall decline. The main concern points to the elderly. Whether in urban or rural areas, the suicide rate of the elderly remains high, and has remained unchanged or even rebounded since 2008.

Therefore, the problem of suicide also provides a perspective to observe society and people's hearts. In this eastern land, how did the suicide problem happen, what are its characteristics and how can it be saved?

Depression syndrome

3 1 Birthday, the wooden bowl hesitated on the bridge. She didn't know whether she should obey the order that kept ringing in her head that day: jump off the bridge.

The telephone suddenly rang. After the classmates wished a happy birthday, they asked where you were. The wooden bowl is stuttering outside. The other party noticed something and kept calling to ask where she was. According to the wind and whistle on the phone, he judged that she was by the river. The students came over and pulled down the wooden bowl across the railing. This is not the first time that Mu Wan tried to commit suicide. She tried to cut her wrist, turn on the gas, take sleeping pills and crash, and was stopped in time before jumping off the building. She later said that it was a rare luck to try to commit suicide again and again.

This was many years ago. Now Mu Wan is a wife and psychological counselor, and has long served in a public welfare interactive organization for depression. On April 9, 2005, after four or five years of dark life, self-mutilation and attempted suicide, Mu Waner was diagnosed with severe depression.

Luo Weiping, almost the most famous depression patient in Shanghai, has a similar trajectory with the wooden bowl. The former senior judge of Huangpu District Court retired at the age of 50 due to depression, and had two experiences of depression in six years. The second time was in the first five years of the new century, which was much more serious than before.

Just like falling into the deepest mire, living itself becomes a kind of pain. ? The pain that can be said is not pain, and I can't accurately describe that state. Sleepless all night, shut yourself up at home, refuse all external information, feel weak and will collapse at any time? This is a denial of yourself and life. To put it bluntly, you have lost interest in living. ? Death may be liberation, and it has become the most thought-provoking thing. He designed all kinds of ways to die. Once again, he tried to jump from the upstairs and was hugged by his wife. Then he became the object of close monitoring by his family.

He survived. Today, Luo Weiping is 63 years old. She is the operator of Shanghai Hope 24-hour suicide crisis intervention hotline. He doesn't mind convincing others with his depressed and suicidal past. Because he has been there before, he can see the pain of those people.

We first met at the subway entrance in Shanghai. He has just finished taking photos of the exhibition. He is covered with dust and people are always in a hurry. The cheeks are thin and sunken, and the cheekbones are flushed, like a long-term high-spirited mood. Eleven titles are written on the back of the business card, most of them are consultants, from which we can get a glimpse of his busy and trivial life at present. He likes to arrange his life in order to create a source of value. It is said that he has no intention of suicide? Secret? . Besides that? Stupid job? He went to Wenchuan six times to participate in post-disaster psychological assistance, participated in college students' teaching 2 times/kloc-0 times, and helped build four hope primary schools.

? It's all soy sauce ? He spoke in a self-deprecating tone. People say I'm crazy It's okay. I'm just happy. ? The old man is willing to communicate, but the words in his mouth jump out of the dialogue context from time to time and go elsewhere. ? Maybe I took too many antidepressants and overcorrected them, which made me a little? Manic? . ? It sounds like a mixture of truth and jokes.

In China, 63% of suicides suffer from mental illness, most of which are depression. Wooden bowl and Lao Luo almost became? 63%? Part of. Depression was still a distant thing at that time. But in recent years, depression has become high frequency, as if everyone's psychological problems are increasing. With the media reports, this disease is more and more commonly associated with suicide. It seems that China's suicide problem is largely a mental problem.

This judgment is debatable. In developed countries such as Europe and America, more than 90% of suicides are diagnosed as depression or mental illness such as alcoholism and drug abuse. The proportion in China is relatively low, which does not conform to the western setting that suicide is closely related to depression.

Lao Luocan can't understand these theories. His creed is to help a little. He calculated that he discouraged 16 depressed patients who attempted suicide, not including psychological intervention for those who attempted suicide. Someone called the suicide intervention hotline, and the operator Lao Luo persuaded him through words and sought support from relatives and friends or people around him. Sometimes, in the face of life and death, he also violates the 24-hour suicide intervention hotline? No private meeting? Ban, and finally rushed to the scene for rescue. Zhao Jia is one of the people he saved.

The temptation of despair?

The last hope in Zhao Jia's life completely disappeared on 18 10/0/8. At least that's what he thinks.

A year ago, in Shanghai, in winter, the landlord came to ask for payment of the rent that had been in arrears for a long time. But Zhao Jia has only twenty dollars in his pocket. There are hundreds of thousands of debts outside, so don't worry. However, it is inevitable that the court of 50,000 yuan will be executed due. He was so tortured that he slept on drugs every night.

The embarrassment and embarrassment of not being able to pay the rent became the last straw to crush him. Seeing off the landlord, he carried a black backpack and walked all the way to Suzhou Creek. In the evening, he hesitated by the river: Why not just jump down and end the hopeless life? This is not the first time that Zhao Jia thought of death. There is a fruit knife in the schoolbag on his shoulder as another way to choose.

I hope to be separated from life a little. In 2002, Zhao Jia was imprisoned for an economic dispute he admitted, and returned to the city where he was born four years later. But everything that Ben has is gone, except the house, career, marriage and daughter, only the elderly and sick parents are left. Basic survival is a problem.

? I am from Shanghai, and I don't even have a place to live when I come out. Do you think it is the worst for a person to reach this stage? ? Zhao Jia is forty years old, and his life is already halfway through. There is little possibility of starting over. But he fell from that high place. Good times. You've been sent to prison again. How can you be content? Zhao Jia returned to the sea, business ups and downs, debt maintenance, or in trouble.

? As long as you see an ignition ahead, you can recover. But not without light. ? A year later, in the early winter, Zhao Jia sat in front of me and described how those years came and went. He refused to stay.

After his release, he waited for seven mornings on his way to school just to see his daughter. When we met again, the little girl came face to face and didn't recognize him. Pretending to be a passer-by, Zhao Jia stepped forward and hit her. No response. Hit again, the daughter looked up and froze: dad! ? The big man's tears immediately fell, and he hugged his daughter.

Zhao Jia proposed to her divorced ex-wife in order to be with her daughter and have a place to live? Try again? . So he moved into the home of his ex-wife and daughter and got a job in a newly established cultural media company. With his parents alive and his children around, he seems to have changed his mind.

His relationship with his daughter, which he cares most about, has also recovered smoothly. ? I didn't look like my father when I came back. I hope to be friends with her, there is no generation gap. I invited my husband out to make up lessons for her and accompany her every week. We had a hard time together, and we had a good chat for a while. ? This 14 year old girl is very good. Although her mother told her about Zhao Jia's imprisonment, she said nothing about it. When her parents quarrel, she doesn't talk and never blames.

As a result, life deceived Zhao Jia. His ex-wife didn't really accept him. When quarreling, she will point angrily at Zhao Jia:? You get out! ? Is there something in the words? I'm the host? Contempt Daughters are always closer to the mother who raised them. In less than a year, Zhao Jia moved out. For a whole week, my daughter's mobile phone could not be connected. The ex-wife concealed her daughter's whereabouts, and Zhao Jia never saw his children again.

Business began to lose money, and Zhao Jia needed funds to turn things around and talk to friends around him. In order to save face, he didn't say he was losing money, only that he wanted to do something and was short of money. Several people extended a helping hand. But business is getting worse and worse, and it is a complete failure. Besides worrying about not paying, Zhao Jia is ashamed of her friends. He still has to hide it from his parents. At that time, my father had had three cerebral infarction, and my mother was a patient with severe depression and was diagnosed with colon cancer.

Is this how life comes step by step? Forced? He has suicidal thoughts. Hopes were dashed. Despair, as the biggest feature of suicide, is a complete denial of the possibility of a better life. In the analysis of the causes of suicide, common sayings such as women are feeling, men are facing realistic pressure, young people are not mature enough, and old people are lost in the family all end in despair. We can no longer pursue happiness, but fall into misfortune, and life is not worth continuing. At the source of modern suicide, this despair was written by Burton, an Englishman? Devil bath water? Lure people to commit suicide.

Male, middle age, city

Zhao Jia didn't jump into Suzhou River in the end. He thought of his parents who had no parents and owed him too much. During the four years in prison, only they visited the prison, delivered money and waited for him to come home. Responsibility triumphed over despair.

The next night, faced with friends who owed money and conscience, Zhao Jia collapsed again. He took out a fruit knife and held it against his neck, which was quickly taken away by Lao Luo present. His weak body made him irresistible. Zhao Jia told me that it was the most confusing moment in his life, but fortunately he was stopped. He soon came to his senses.

Some insiders suspect that Zhao Jia suffers from depression. Having studied psychology, he firmly denied it. I still have self-control He didn't take psychotropic drugs. He adjusted himself little by little.

Depression or psychiatry can't answer? 63%? The pain of those dead lives outside. What is the cause of suicide? The only philosophical question? Because it refers to whether earthly life is worth living, which is the root of human happiness. Life is worse than death, on the one hand, because the present life is insulated from beauty and full of misfortune, on the other hand, it is believed that this misfortune will never improve or cannot be improved within the tolerable time. Complex happiness theory tells us that few people really think? Being alive is a good thing in itself, and life is lighter than what should be in this world.

But is it really hopeless? It is doubtful whether people in pain have the ability to rationally evaluate their real situation. Have their reasons for despair been thoroughly considered? Zhao Jia gave his own answer by action: there are still homesickness and ties in the world.

Meeting that day, Zhao Jia repeated several times. I'm a man? . Self-esteem and face are the essence of life. So he can't live with his ex-wife, and he has to hide many things from his parents and can't tell his friends the truth. Stress and problems are independent, so it is difficult. In the field of sociological suicide research, Zhao Jia belongs to a typical high-risk group of suicide. Simply put, most of these people have the following characteristics: male, middle-aged, living in the city.

The research report shows that in the past decade, the average annual suicide rate in China has dropped to 9.8 per 65,438+1100,000 people, a decrease of 58%. However, the decline is mainly in rural young women, and the suicide rate of middle-aged men has not decreased with the overall decline. Most urban suicides are between the ages of 35 and 49. With what we have? China has a high female suicide rate? The impression is different. Around 2006, the number of male suicides in urban and rural areas began to exceed that of female suicides.

Durkheim, a representative figure in this field, drew his conclusion based on his observation of Europe in the19th century. With the development of industrialization, urbanization and modernization, people's social integration has declined and the degree of anomie has intensified. ? These high-risk groups face the problems of alienation, loneliness and alienation brought by modernity to a greater extent. They are facing suicide? Temptation? More fragile.

We are no strangers to this description, even familiar with it. Isn't this China now, or at least China in the eyes of public opinion? Perhaps Durkheim's words were echoed in China more than a century ago.

In the echo, a psychological crisis intervention hotline appeared. According to the statistics of Beijing Psychological Crisis Research and Intervention Center last year, domestic service agencies set up 55 psychological hotlines and crisis intervention hotlines. They are open to anyone who can make a phone call. At the other end of the phone, a qualified psychotherapist should provide guidance and intervention. But the reality is not so perfect, and many hotlines have indicated that they have no numbers.

On the banks of Suzhou River, when Zhao Jia was caught in a dilemma of being ashamed of his parents and longing for liberation, he picked up his mobile phone and dialed the number of hope 24 hours a day. I hope 24 hours is the first 24-hour crisis intervention public welfare hotline in Shanghai. This phone number was found on the Internet a few days ago when Zhao Jia was searching for suicide and adjusting her mood. The gentle female voice on the other end of the phone was a little anxious after hearing his words.

Lao Luo initially participated in Zhao Jia's later intervention as a legal aid. By rights, two people can't meet. But eager to save people, Lao Luo broke this rule. He accompanied Zhao Jia to face his indebted friends and took the sword from his neck. The two forged a mutual affection and have maintained it to this day.

Those old people who committed suicide

Huang Weiping, who supported Wenchuan with Lao Luo, still remembers two elderly people who tried to commit suicide. He is a volunteer of a life education institution in Shanghai. In the past few years, he has supported the community and provided mental health services.

Five years ago, he talked with the old man who cut his wrist and committed suicide in a nursing home for an afternoon. The old man is from Ningbo, seventy years old, a little withdrawn, and his spirit is OK. After being rescued, Old Ningbo kept apologizing. Trouble for everyone? It seems that I have made a serious mistake. That morning, when everyone was having breakfast, he cut himself with the blade of the nail clipper. He put a washbasin beside the bed in advance for fear that the dripping blood would pollute the ground.

Afterwards, old Ningbo was full of guilt. He was most worried about causing trouble to everyone, so he had a washbasin, so he promised not to make the same mistake again. What is Huang Weiping's evaluation result of old Ningbo? Trauma and loneliness after the death of a spouse? . His wife died three years ago, and then he was sent to a nursing home. Although he has two sons, few people visit him. But can this simple assessment fully explain his pain? Huang Weiping said he doubted it himself.

The other time was three years ago, the old lady who lived alone attempted suicide three times. It's also a family conflict. She gave the house to her youngest daughter and broke another man's heart. The old lady regrets and talks all day, so she has a bad relationship with her little daughter. She turned on the gas and jumped off the building. Later, the daughter felt that the old lady was threatening it, not dying. She is a frail old man, and the volunteers who grab the door have been talking. Perhaps, the expression of broken mouth also increased the child's disgust.

Chronic illness, world-weariness and family disputes are usually considered as the biggest incentives for elderly people to commit suicide. It's not hard to understand. When the flame of life is gradually extinguished, the weakness, difficulty and pain brought by illness are the great sources of torture. The possibility of their own social development has dropped sharply, and the elderly will turn their expectations to their families. Once family members can't meet their emotional expectations and provide support and dependence, they will resent love and be prone to despair.

In the context of the overall decline of suicide rate in China in the past decade, the suicide rate of the elderly has remained high in both urban and rural areas, and has remained unchanged or even rebounded since 2008. At present, the suicide rate of the elderly in China is four to five times the world average.

In the office of HKU, Professor Ye, who participated in the research report, told me that with the growth of the elderly population, their suicide problem will become the main concern of preventive intervention. In the last three years, nearly half of the suicides in China were over 65 years old, and 79% of them came from rural areas.

Who will keep these old people who want to leave? In the impression of Shen Xiaoyan, the operator of Shenzhen psychological crisis intervention hotline, she has never received a call for help from the elderly. Only once, a man asked his mother for help. Because two daughters passed away one after another, the mother was in a trance and suicidal, so the son made this call and asked how to protect her. The common suicide intervention hotline seems to have little effect. The care and persuasion of children's relatives and friends are also difficult to guarantee. If they can't take care of their real lives, who has leisure to care about the hearts of the elderly? A wrong understanding is that the mind will rot with the body. It seems that the old people don't have to pay attention to anything, just make do with everything.

But these elderly people who committed suicide are calling for help in the most intense and extreme way at the cost of their lives. If Durkheim's description and judgment reflect an important aspect of the current suicide problem in China, it is obviously not the most serious one.

Despair and hope are intertwined.

The office of Hope 24-hour hotline is located on the first floor of Oriental Hope Building in Pudong, close to the office of English training institutions, a social organization and the canteen of the whole building. Since the opening of 2012,65438 in February, it has received 294 1 passenger a year? Suicide? Call from ... Lin Kunhui, founder and secretary general of Taiwan Province Suicide Prevention Association, said that the biggest bottleneck of the hotline at present is that it has not established communication and cooperation with the police, and it is difficult to carry out alarm and rescue work across provinces and cities.

Similar problems also appeared in Shenzhen Psychological Crisis Intervention Center. Although the intervention center affiliated to Shenzhen Kangning Hospital has been established for ten years, it has not established a separate communication and cooperation channel with the police and the hospital. Does this mean that the critical time can only pass? 1 10? 、? 120? Send a request for on-site rescue.

Center? Senator? Zhu Fangfang is still worried about a phone call. About six or seven years ago, in the middle of the night, a lovelorn girl cried on the other end of the phone and said that her boyfriend had left, saying that she was dizzy and stood on the roof to blow. The failed love broke her heart and she didn't have the courage to live. Encouraged by Zhu Fangfang, she refused to contact her parents, but agreed to meet her boyfriend again and seek answers. In the torture of waiting, the girl began to count down. Starting from ten, ten, nine, eight, seven? Zhu Fangfang said that her heart was in her throat. With the help of the team, 1 10? 、? 120? Everyone has called, but Zhu Fangfang feels that counting is testing himself. When she couldn't remember whether it was four or three o'clock, the girl's boyfriend arrived. The crisis has finally been lifted.

How much gesture does that girl have in her behavior? Zhu Fangfang hesitated and said there might be. But she immediately stressed that this is not a problem at all in suicide intervention. People who don't send distress signals don't commit suicide. Despair and hope are intertwined. Who wins depends on who looks clearer at that moment. Grasping that little idea in despair and amplifying it is just an important way of intervention.

But if the girl hadn't called that number, the result might have been different. As the most common way of suicide intervention, the hotline is undoubtedly completely passive. If it receives the help signal first, it will only start the intervention mode. What should those who can't send out distress signals do?

In addition, suicide seems to be something outside the logic of any public power. The police and hospitals are not concerned about suicide itself. It's really not their responsibility. What about the intervention hotline concerned about suicide? The hotline of Shenzhen Psychological Crisis Intervention Center has no special funds so far, and the cost comes from the public health funds allocated by Shenzhen Municipal Health Planning Commission. The civil 24-hour hotline is a complete volunteer organization.

These dilemmas finally point to a question: who has the right to interfere with others' suicide and is not allowed to commit suicide for justified reasons? In other words, who can force people to gain wisdom and courage in life?

Wu Fei, who had long observed and studied suicide in a county in northern China, pointed out the root cause of suicide. In a series of books about suicide, a philosophy professor at Peking University said: Perhaps this is the real paradox of suicide. On the one hand, suicide means that people's happy life is threatened; On the other hand, this extremely personal happiness problem is difficult to be interfered by external forces from any angle.

The problem of suicide reflects the dilemma of modernity to some extent. Since individual rights and freedoms have become universal values, who can reverse the decision made by free will?

After the rescue,

In class, Shelley? Kagan mentioned that even if the suicide crisis is lifted, the problems that plague them will not disappear out of thin air, and people in pain and despair will naturally not be happy.

What the philosophy teacher said makes sense. Zhao Jia has not paid off his debts, and his economic situation is not very good. ? But take your time. ? He tried to keep himself busy and think less. Zhao Jia likes being with children. He formed a QQ group with more than 300 fans, and selected people from it to form two youth teams, mostly students. Although there is no economic benefit yet, it has attracted sponsors. In addition, he also gave free course counseling to two junior high school students.

He spent too much energy on a rebellious junior three girl. In addition to giving children free language supplements, he also paid for math and English teachers and bought children mountain villages and rhodiola. I even discussed with her parents that when she went to college, he would pay for sending her children abroad.

Entrustment is a projection of emotion, which reminds me of what he said at the end of the first half of his life: there is a child at home, and now I don't know where to go and I can't find it. So my life experience, the first half of my life is like this. ?

Zhao Jia said that happiness is more important and can change many negative things in my heart. He always teaches those children to live happily every day. But happiness is still difficult for him. I can't do it myself, okay? .

Those past setbacks and pains will not become precious wealth, nor will they become the source of positive energy. Zhao Jia knew that the pain still existed. ? To put it bluntly, I can't guarantee whether I will commit suicide in this situation in the future. Because that's not true. People always have an emotional boundary, once broken, people will collapse. I'm in a bad mood at all, so I'll go this way. ?

This kind? Fragile? It involves the living conditions in Zhao Jia. Apart from financial pressure, Zhao Jia is still alone, and her parents are her only relatives. He admits that this unstable state floating in mid-air has a great influence on psychology. Zhao Jia envies Mr. Luo? Have a family, a partner, a child and a stable mind? .

Unfortunate factors will not disappear naturally. Ye knows this truth well. ? Suicide is not only a medical problem, but also an overall social health problem. ? He said that while intervening in suicide cases, it is equally important to improve the overall environment and avoid adverse factors that lead to despair. The improvement of the overall environment has both internal and external aspects. Externally, it is the improvement of the whole social welfare system, medical security and working environment. Internally, it is to enhance people's endurance and problem-solving ability. In the past ten years, he led the team of the Hong Kong Jockey Club Suicide Prevention Research Center, constantly looking for ways to improve the environment in Hong Kong and prevent people from committing suicide.

These efforts include many trivial things. For example, it is suggested that charcoal should be sold centrally and not placed at will; Install safety doors on subway stations; Take care of the families of suicides and prevent them from committing suicide; Searching online for marginal people who may have suicidal tendencies; Go deep into the community, care for vulnerable groups, and publicize intervention knowledge.

In the last lesson of philosophy of death, Shelley, who is still wearing plaid shirts and jeans? Kagan cautiously concluded:? Suppose there is such a situation, some people can rationally evaluate their situation and find that it is better to die. Consider everything, not act rashly, and make a well-thought-out, completely voluntary decision with good reasons. Suicide is acceptable, although not in all cases. ?

But he immediately went on to say:? What should we do when we see someone trying to commit suicide? Can we be sure that he meets all the above restrictions? We should be cautious. We have to assume that this person is too sad, too blind, unable to think clearly, and has lost the ability to judge correctly, and there is no legitimate reason. ?

It's hard to grasp the reality and people's hearts, decided? Suicide? This choice is difficult to be completely rational. Philosophical discussion is one thing. And in the face of every weak heart, every weak life, we must try our best to retain it.

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