Like many people, I have a deep understanding of the word "internal friction".

When I was still in high school, I began to fall into deep anxiety. Once, I had no confidence in myself, and I couldn't tell reality from illusion. At that time, I didn't know I was suffering from internal friction, leaving only a lot of mental trauma for myself, which even had a great impact on me now.

Internal friction is like chronic suicide. Without the direct participation of others, it is often the killer who hurts himself.

We all want to achieve ourselves and reach our ideal state in a limited life, but at the same time, troubles will come with expectations and pains will follow.

Many times we are like this-we have goals but still have a lot of worries. After a long time, we still haven't taken a step, and time has been consumed less and less.

In fact, the starting point of self-achievement is to stop internal friction. It is far more meaningful for us to spend time and energy on self-improvement than self-consumption.

0 1 Don't be consumed by other people's ideas.

People who always care about other people's ideas live very tired, because they are used to defining their values with other people's attitudes.

I once knew a girl during the summer vacation, and her persistence in other people's ideas left a deep impression on me. Because of my hometown accent, Mandarin is a bit awkward, so I seldom take the initiative to speak. She is also coy when others talk to her, which is unnatural.

Once the foreman asked her to give a message to other employees, and she was afraid of embarrassment, so I passed it on to her.

Later, I told her that many employees she didn't contact had their hometown accents, but they had a pleasant exchange and wouldn't be embarrassed. It has always been that she cares too much about other people's opinions. People never care about her accent, but she has formed countless embarrassing pictures in her mind.

We may all be caught in a mental storm because of the carelessness of others, always suspecting and expecting.

Just an expression or an action of others may become the driving force of our extrapolation or the starting point of our continuous internal friction.

But we don't have to care so much about what other people think. For a little malicious meditation and a little praise, how can you achieve yourself wholeheartedly with all your enthusiasm and expectation?

We work hard for ourselves every day. Why bother to ponder other people's ideas and add unnecessary burden to yourself?

Don't dwell on past internal friction.

It is also a weakness of human nature to dwell on the past.

When I used to live in my grandmother's house in the countryside, my grandmother and several grandmothers in the neighborhood often sat together and chatted. Sometimes when chatting, grandma's eyes are red because she recalls all kinds of hardships and grievances she suffered in the past. Whenever this happens, the people next to her have to comfort for a long time.

There is a grandmother named Wang, chubby and always smiling. She never showed sadness, and I always suspected that she used to be tactful. But grandma said that few people of their age don't suffer. Grandma Wang is really open-minded. Looking back now, her smiling face is not because of how smooth she used to be, but because she doesn't dwell on the past and only lives contentedly in the present.

Life is not a one-act play, and the injustice and gloom of the past should not be the rope that binds us. Looking further, the past gains and losses are all a dream, and the road of life needs us to go on soberly, and only when we get out of the dream can we see the light.

Stop daydreaming about internal friction.

I believe that in real life, many people have their own ideal life, but not everyone is doing their best for their ideal life.

More ironically, there are still many people who can't wake up from their fantasies and let them consume their lives.

Last Spring Festival, my cousin brought her children to my house to pay a New Year call. Only three or four-year-old children will take the Tsinghua exam, which reminds me that my cousin was also ambitious. When my cousin was in junior high school, I was in primary school. She is not keen on learning, and her grades are always just above the passing line. But she often tells me her ideal future-going to a key university and then studying abroad.

My cousin's ideal once made my blood boil, but she didn't persist in high school, so she dropped out of school in a hurry, went out to work, got married and had children. Many people have a similar beginning to their cousins, but because of lack of action and persistence, the once fiery ideal has become a fantasy day and night.

There are many people in the world who have ideals and realize them, but no one can succeed without thinking. It is a good thing to have ideals, but ideals with slogans and no actions are just meaningless fantasies. Long-term obsession with fantasy will only lead to gains and losses, and nothing will be achieved.

Write at the end:

There are many factors that cause internal friction in our life, which may be a look, a joke or a sigh. But whether we fall into the abyss of internal friction ultimately depends on ourselves.

Don't doubt yourself if you don't know what others think of you. Always be yourself.

If you can't change the past, just remember it. Don't fall or cry, just keep the happiness of the present.

If you have an ideal, you can use action and persistence to help you get rid of unrealistic dreams completely.

The rest of my life is precious. Stop internal friction and let us all be invincible on the road to success.

The author introduces:

Yu Guangli, a post-95 freelance writer, focuses on writing and growth cognition, and personally promotes related dry goods. I look forward to making progress with you.