The most direct way to deal with the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is, of course, to prevent mother-in-law and daughter-in-law from living together and eliminate the contradiction from the root, but this method is unrealistic and many families do not have this condition. So when the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law live together, how can we find a suitable way to deal with it? It is a problem that two people should think together.
At this time, it is necessary for the mother-in-law to change her concept and recognize the roles of herself and her daughter-in-law. Many mothers-in-law hope that they can marry a daughter-in-law who is willing to pay for nothing, but there is no such thing in this world. If a horse wants to run and doesn't let it eat grass, people's contributions are equal. Son and daughter-in-law are two equal individuals. The daughter-in-law works hard and does her best, and the mother-in-law should be grateful. Even if the daughter-in-law is really lazy and doesn't do any work, the mother-in-law has no right to interfere, because in law, the daughter-in-law is only responsible for her son, and only when the son has a say in her daughter-in-law's behavior can she judge whether her daughter-in-law's behavior is right or wrong.
Jia Lin and Gu Fei met in college. They were college classmates, but they didn't get in touch much at first. They are just ordinary classmates. They met when they were looking for a job after graduation and became lovers.
They got married after dating for several years. After marriage, they bought a suite with the money saved by their work for several years and the money sponsored by their parents. The house is very small, just a small three-bedroom, but it is the couple's first home. Jia Lin decorated the house carefully and then moved in.
Shortly after the house was renovated, Gu Fei lived with her mother-in-law and the young couple. At first, Jia Lin wanted to get along with her mother-in-law. After several attempts, she gave up because her mother-in-law was too difficult. No matter what she does, her mother-in-law can find a way to talk about her. She doesn't cook by herself, and asks her to cook. When she brings out the dishes, it's not that her mother-in-law doesn't like the dishes with too much salt, that is, she doesn't cook the dishes she likes. She endured her mother-in-law several times, and finally could not help but challenge her mother-in-law, and her mother-in-law and daughter-in-law broke up completely.
In the second year of marriage, Jia Lin was found pregnant. During pregnancy, she took care of her baby at home and spent more time with her mother-in-law. Her mother-in-law always looks at her unhappily. When Jia Lin has nothing to do during pregnancy, she will shop online and buy some daily necessities. Every time the courier is sent home, her mother-in-law will cynically say that Jia Lin doesn't know how to do things, but only knows how to spend money. Jia Lin refuses to spend your money every time.
Mother-in-law couldn't beat Jia Lin, so she secretly reported to Gu Fei. One day, when Jia Lin was asleep in the room, her mother-in-law took Gu Fei aside and whispered to him, "What a wonderful wife you married. She doesn't earn a penny every day, spends money indiscriminately and is lazy all day. She will lose all her money at home. It's shameless. "
When Gu Fei heard her mother-in-law's words, she not only didn't approve, but said to her mother-in-law, "Mom, are you talking about yourself? Isn't it just doing nothing all day, not making money, but spending money? Xiao Jia is pregnant with my child and can't work. I am her husband, and the baby in her belly is mine. I should be responsible for him. She has suffered the pain of giving birth to a child. I want to take good care of her and not let her be wronged in other places. Xiao Jia is your daughter-in-law, not your competitor. Why do you bother her every day? She is a woman whom I vowed to stay for a lifetime. I hope you can respect my choice and respect my wife. "
Gu Fei's words came down, leaving her mother-in-law speechless and knowing her son's thoughts. Since then, my mother-in-law has never bothered Jia Lin again. The whole family is very kind and has never had any major conflicts.
The reasons for the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law in a family are very complicated, but the way to deal with it is very simple. Although the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law are incompatible, their starting point is the same, all for the good of their sons. Just because of different positions and interests, it is easy to produce contradictions.
At this time, the way the son handles it is very important. Whether a son can take responsibility, protect his wife, change his mother's mind and reconcile the contradiction between mother and wife reflects his emotional intelligence.
In marriage, we should put the small family first, put the small family first, and then consider the interests of the extended family. If husband and wife have no right to speak in the family, then marriage will not be stable.
As an elder, we should change our ideas and not always think that we are the oldest in our family. We believe that young people should listen to their own voices. Children have their own thoughts and lives. As elders, it is better to go with them and go with them. How they live depends on themselves. If they relax, they may get different results.