The reasons are complicated and varied. Mainly because of anger. Nervousness and fear can't relax, can't sleep, can't rest. All thoughts are gone, and that kind of despair is indescribable. In the end, I made a difficult choice-elaborate design, concrete plan and suicide. Some teenagers commit suicide, and some young people commit suicide after falling in love. Some teachers committed suicide, some experts committed suicide, some billionaires committed suicide, some dignitaries committed suicide, and countless ordinary people. Suicide and murder are the same thing, and they don't want to mix in this world. I want to get rid of pain and go to a place where there is no pain.
I once met a young woman who committed suicide by taking poison and was rescued successfully. Still looking for opportunities to commit suicide, scaring the family to accompany them to the toilet. If you are not careful, jump off a building, dive, cut your wrist, hang yourself and hit your head. . . . It's useless Famous for a long time, introduce it to me. My patient said: the reason for your pain is thought. I will give you a medicine to make your heart die without pain. But your body needs us to take care of it We let a normal soul in. This body does not belong to you. He said yes, as long as his heart dies without pain. After the oral contract was signed, he agreed to take the medicine. I didn't kill myself, but gave the medicine to his relatives. Take medicine on time every day. Sleep like a log every day. The family saved a lot of worries. When we met in the street a few years later, she gave me a smiling face. I'm at a loss. Who is this man? Why give me a smiling face. Then I remembered this man. Because it turned out that it was insomnia and lost weight. Now she is a chubby beauty for nothing. So I can't recognize it.
Attachment: teacher suicide case:
The head teacher of the third grade in Guantao County, Hebei Province committed suicide by taking poison, saying that he was too tired at work 2012005 28 02: 14 The Beijing News Weibo May 17, the photo of Zhao Peng saved in his wife Ma Tingting's mobile phone, in which Zhao Peng was most concerned about his wife and children. Beijing News reporter Liu She
Zhao Peng's father went to Guantao last summer vacation and took a photo of his family.
20 12 1, when Zhao Peng was the head teacher, the class was rated as "advanced class collective".
After the incident, the principal of Guantao No.1 Middle School called the police and the police intervened in the investigation. Beijing News reporter Liu She
■ introduction
Zhao Peng, born in 1982, taught in No.1 Middle School in Guantao County, Hebei Province after graduating from university, and served as the head teacher of Grade 3.
Go out to do morning exercises with senior three students every day until the students go to bed at night, and the day's work is over.
Perhaps because of the pressure of life, work, economy and other aspects, he chose to commit suicide by taking poison in the office when he was less than 30 years old.
Zhao Peng said in his suicide note that the only thing he can't let go of now is his son who is less than two years old. I hope the school can help him take care of their mother and son.
On the evening of April 27th, after visiting the student dormitory, Zhao Peng finished his day's work. He went back to the office, closed the curtains, turned off the lights and drank a bottle of dichlorvos.
Zhao Peng was born in 1982. Before his death, he was the head teacher in the third grade of No.1 Middle School in Guantao County, Hebei Province.
Zhao Peng, who changed his fate through the college entrance examination, became the head teacher of senior three, and his endless repetitive work and "moonlight salary" made him feel suffocated.
On the day he received his salary in April, he chose to commit suicide by taking poison.
take poison
On April 28th, an empty bottle of dichlorvos was placed on a small table, and only a sticky layer remained at the bottom of the bottle of 350ml dichlorvos.
On April 28th, there are still 38 days before the college entrance examination.
At 6 o'clock in the morning 10, neat morning exercises slogans sounded on the campus of the first middle school in Guantao County, Hebei Province. On this day, Chen Lei found that Zhao Peng, the head teacher of Class A4 in Senior Three, did not appear on the playground as usual.
Chen Lei is the head teacher of Grade A/KLOC-0 and the deputy director of Grade III.
At six twenty, Chen Lei walked into the office. According to the requirements of the previous day's examination meeting, he will arrange the second module of the college entrance examination.
The curtains in the office are closed, which is a little dark. Curtains are rarely closed at ordinary times. Chen Lei didn't think much at first. He gets up early and comes home late every day, and he doesn't get enough sleep. He sat awake at his desk for a while, thought about what to do, and went out again.
About 10 minutes later, he took the students into the room and removed all the signs in the examination room. At this time, he found Zhao Peng lying under the computer desk: legs stretched straight, toes stretched tightly, one hand pressed under the abdomen, and the other hand seemed to be holding something. His posture looks uncomfortable.
"Brother Peng, are you drunk?" Chen Lei patted him on the shoulder. Zhao Peng's body is cold.
At this time, Chen Leicai noticed something strange in the office, the curtains were closed, and an empty bottle of dichlorvos was placed on a small table, leaving only a sticky layer at the bottom of the bottle, which was 350 ml of dichlorvos.
"It's broken. Brother Peng drank pesticides. " Chen Lei was so surprised that he fell asleep.
He called the class teachers of the same grade group, such as Xue Guang and Yang Xianwen, and called the emergency number. It's too late to 120. Zhao Peng took too much poison and the rescue time was too long. The headmaster, Wang, reported the news to the police.
Zhao Peng's coat was hanging aside, and the teachers found Zhao Peng's suicide note from his inner pocket: "It's tiring to be alive. Going to work like this every day is suffocating, and the salary can only be moonlight. I decided to leave here in this way. I don't hate this place. After all, I chose to come here. The only thing I can't let go of now is how my son will live in the future. I just hope the school can help me take care of their mother and son. Zhao Peng 2065438+April 27, 2002. "
On this day, there are 18 days before Zhao Peng's 30th birthday.
Special day
It is rumored that everyone will be given a laptop this year. Teachers are all looking forward to this day.
According to teachers' speculation, Zhao Peng should have taken poison on the evening of April 27th.
April 27th, the day when wages and benefits are paid, is a happy day. Moreover, there have been rumors before that the leaders of County No.27 will go to school to visit the class teacher of Grade Three.
Last year, as a "hard work fee", each class teacher issued an electric car; This year, there are rumors that everyone will be given a laptop. Teachers are all looking forward to this day.
Zhao Peng is also very concerned. At 8 o'clock in the evening on the 26th, he called his parents in Suihua, Heilongjiang, and specifically mentioned this matter. He said that the county magistrate would call home when he came, and he would not call if he didn't come. This is the last call between Zhao Peng and his parents.
On this day, the county leaders did not come.
At about 6 pm on April 27th, Zhao Peng received a salary reminder message, and the salary in April arrived. "1450 yuan, less 500 yuan." Zhao Peng showed Chen Lei the salary message.
In March, in addition to the basic salary of 1.45 yuan, Zhao Peng received a transportation subsidy of * * * 1.95 yuan.
In fact, 500 yuan subsidy is a temporary subsidy policy issued by Hebei Province. 20 12 Hebei province gives 980 yuan subsidies to civil servants and staff of public institutions every month in the name of transportation subsidies and spiritual civilization awards. In Guantao, every teacher becomes 500 yuan.
This subsidy policy has only been implemented in Hebei for one month. In April, Guantao also cancelled the 500 yuan subsidy. No one will realize what this 500 yuan means to Zhao Peng.
At 8 o'clock in the evening, Zhao Peng attended the exam meeting held by the class teacher and arranged the mock exam for the next day. At the examination meeting, the teachers also mentioned the students who fought during the day. On this day, a student in Zhao Peng's class fought with another class. Zhao Peng criticized the students in the class and drove them home to reflect.
The handling of this matter is not like Zhao Peng's style. In 2009, Zhao Peng took Class Two of Senior High School, and a student violated discipline, so the school had to expel him. Zhao Peng said "fire him, fire me first" and finally saved the student. The students all like this honest and frank teacher very much, and some students say that they are very close to him.
"The students in our class are like their own children. Even if they make a small mistake, they should not take their children so seriously. " At the examination meeting, the class teacher advised Zhao Peng, and Chen Lei found that Zhao Peng kept stroking his hair without saying a word, and looked restless.
In a flash, Chen Lei wanted to talk to him, if he had time. After the meeting, they were busy informing the students about the exam, but they didn't meet.
After the evening self-study, Xue Guang and Zhao Peng, three class teachers, are on duty to check the dormitory.
At about 0/0: 40 in the evening, after checking the dormitory, Zhao Peng didn't go home, but went back to the office alone, turned off the lights, closed the curtains and drank a whole bottle of pesticides.
According to police investigation, at about 6: 30 pm on April 27th, Zhao Peng bought pesticides in an agricultural store two or three hundred meters west of the school. Chen Lei guessed that Zhao Peng should buy pesticides after receiving the text message of salary.
The survival of "formatting"
There should be more than 100 mock exams and exams in senior high schools. When running morning exercises every day, the class teacher will follow.
Guantao County No.1 Middle School is the only high school in Guantao County. Like many county high schools, closed management is implemented and there is only one holiday every month. Students and teachers live a formatted life, and follow a fixed procedure every day.
Each class teacher is responsible for all aspects of fifty or sixty students.
Do exercises at six o'clock in the morning in winter 10. At 5: 40 in the morning, Zhao Peng woke up from the alarm clock. Sometimes I go to school without washing my face. Before 6 o'clock, I rushed to the office to sign in, and then I went to the playground with the students to run and exercise.
When running and exercising every day, the class teacher should follow, shout class training and slogans with the students to drive away sleepiness and cheer up.
Including self-study in the morning and evening, there are 13 classes every day, and at about 10 in the evening, the head teacher will go to the dormitory to make sure all the students are there, and then go home to rest after the students turn off the lights.
His wife Ma Tingting recalled that Zhao Peng didn't come home until 6 o'clock every night. If his 1 or more sons are awake, he will play with his son for a while, and then he can go to bed. Sometimes when he was too tired to come back, Zhao Peng didn't wash his feet, and his son ignored him and went straight to sleep.
According to a teacher, there are more than 100 mock exams, exams, monthly exams, weekly exams and quizzes in Guantao No.1 Middle School. In senior three, all subjects have weekly practice, and the monthly exam is more firm.
Every month, students have a day off, and the teacher has to finish the monthly exam paper on this day.
Every winter and summer vacation, it is not easy for a class teacher. It is not allowed to make up lessons according to regulations, but it has become a practice. You can still have a rest during the holiday in Grade One, and you can only have a rest for about 10 days during the winter and summer vacations in Grade Two and Grade Three.
When making up lessons, the class teacher is more tired than usual. A teacher who has attended many graduation classes said that it will not be easy even if he attends graduation classes. If the school arranges to take the senior three exam again, it means that the last student has not finished volunteering, and the next student's summer vacation will begin.
On weekdays, the class teacher should pay attention to everything. "Whoever has improved his academic performance recently and whose academic performance has dropped, we need to talk to him."
A teacher said that every day, my head is buzzing, and at night, it basically doesn't turn much. "Sometimes I can't care so much, but I can't ruin a student because of irresponsibility."
Another teacher said, "Our work is everything. We eat and sleep for work. "
Nobody wants to be a class teacher.
The workload is too heavy, and the income is not commensurate with the effort; As a school, it is also facing great pressure to enter a higher school.
"No one wants to be a class teacher, they all send people's heads." A class teacher in Guantao No.1 Middle School said that being a class teacher only gets an extra 200 yuan allowance every month.
The workload is too heavy, and the income is not commensurate with the effort. In Guantao No.1 Middle School, the teacher in charge is often a younger teacher, and the leader gives the head, so it is not easy to refuse.
Because no one wants to be a class teacher, the two teachers have two classes each. After Zhao Peng's death, Liu Xiangguang, the head teacher, took over Class A4, a senior three student brought by Zhao Peng. Today, there are only 14 teachers left in Class 7 of Grade 3.
The high school classes in Guantao Middle School are divided into Part A and Part B, which is a way to improve grades and introduce competition. Both departments have fast classes and slow classes, and Class A4 of Senior Three brought by Zhao Peng is the slow class of Department A. ..
A teacher revealed that as a school, it is also facing great pressure to enter a higher school.
As the only high school in Guantao County, it can't absorb all the local students, and the loss of students is very serious. In Guantao County, the top 200 students who take the senior high school entrance examination every year, at most 150, will be transferred to middle schools in Hengshui and other places. High-quality students were poached. In order to improve students' academic performance, we need to redouble our efforts and strictly manage them.
After Wang took over as principal, he asked to learn from other middle schools famous for their rigorous scholarship.
On the weekend after the Spring Festival of 20 12, the head teachers of Grade Three visited a key middle school. After studying in Guantao No.1 Middle School, I began to pay attention to exercise. The obvious change is that in addition to morning exercises, recess exercises have been added.
"If there are students, there must be teachers." A teacher introduced that before the class teacher checked the night, the morning exercises and self-study the next day could be ignored.
Later, I paid attention to two exercises, whether there was a night shift to check the dormitory, and the class teacher was required to be present in the morning exercise the next day.
……
"Brother Lei, I really can't stand it."
"Peng elder brother, there are more than 50 days. When the exam is over, we will go back to the northeast together. "
This is a casual conversation between Chen Lei and Zhao Peng in mid-April. Chen Lei always wondered if this was a sign of Zhao Peng's despair.
Zhao Peng also told his wife that he was tired.
For more than half a year, Zhao Peng's hair has fallen off badly. He said that if his hair fell off again, he would shave his head.
Used to be the pride of the family.
"The score of the senior high school entrance examination was 633, and none of our children tested him." To this day, this is still my mother's pride.
On the morning of April 28th, Zhao Zhihua, who was far away in Suihua City, Heilongjiang Province, received three calls from Guantao County No.1 Middle School. He didn't believe that his son Zhao Peng would commit suicide by taking poison, and his mother Zeng Shuhua thought it was a fraudulent phone call.
Zeng Shuhua called her daughter-in-law Ma Tingting with trembling hands. "Mom, it's true." Daughter-in-law Ma Tingting cried on the phone.
Zeng Shuhua said that her brain exploded with a bang.
Zhao Peng's family, life has been very difficult. He is the only son in the family and the only hope.
Zeng Shuhua said that Zhao Peng's good academic performance since childhood is the pride of his family. Although the family is difficult, Zhao Peng makes this family very dignified. "The score of the senior high school entrance examination was 633, and none of our children tested him." So far, this is still the pride of Zeng Shuhua.
After two college entrance examinations, in 2003, Zhao Peng was admitted to Suihua College of Harbin Normal University as an English major.
The annual tuition fee is 9000 yuan. "How much do you have to pay?" Zhao Zhihua said that it is the hope of the whole family for his son to go to college, and he contributed to the tuition for the first year. During his college years, Zhao Peng also lived on the subsidy of being a tutor. My family thought it would be good to read this book.
In June 2005, Zhao Peng needed a mobile phone when she was looking for a job in the second half of her junior year. In order to buy Zhao Peng a mobile phone made in 450 yuan, Zeng Shuhua sold her necklace. Six years later, this mobile phone was transferred to his father Zhao Zhihua to continue using it.
My family has always been optimistic, and I feel that it is good to read books. The whole family borrowed money to let Zhao Peng go to school, thinking about letting Zhao Peng have a bright future.
Comfort the dead
Students in the class left a message on the Internet during the holiday, saying that they would try their best to test their level and comfort Zhao Peng, the head teacher.
Optimism does not change the employment problem. In 2006, Zhao Peng applied for a job and prepared 10 resumes, only two of which were submitted.
In 2006, Liu Lanshan, then president of Guantao No.1 Middle School, and others went to the Northeast to recruit teachers. The school promised to pay 700 yuan's salary every month, and it will be paid after half a year, which attracted Zhao Peng.
Guantao is a place I have never heard of. Going or not? "This place is better than the countryside." When the family couldn't help, Zeng Shuhua rescued her son. You need a diploma to sign up for a job, but Zhao Peng still owes the school three years' tuition and can't get a diploma.
I borrowed 27,000 yuan from my relatives, and finally got enough college tuition and got my diploma. Since then, the students in Guantao No.1 Middle School have a teacher who speaks Northeast English.
In 2008, Zhao Peng was introduced to marry Ma Tingting. Ma Tingting is a radiology nurse in Guantao People's Hospital, an informal employee, with a monthly basic salary of 308 yuan, plus 60 yuan subsidy. "He told me that as long as we are both happy, it doesn't matter whether we have money or not." Ma Tingting said.
Zhao Peng is the pillar of the family. Zhao's basic salary is only 1450 yuan, but it is the biggest income of his family.
At the end of 20 10, the son was born, which brought happiness to the family, but the economic burden also increased.
Then at 20 1 1, the new house was delivered again, with a down payment and decoration, and 70,000 yuan was borrowed, and the mortgage was 630 yuan per month. Children's milk powder needs 500 yuan to go to 600 yuan, and the monthly consumption is several thousand yuan. In addition, the family still has debts of 6.5438+0.3 million yuan. Zhao Peng's salary in April is less than that in 500 yuan last month, which is equivalent to a month's milk powder for children.
Before the accident, Zhao Peng was still trying to evaluate the intermediate title, and he could be promoted from a second-level teacher to a first-level teacher with a monthly basic salary of more than 300 yuan. However, there is a quota limit for evaluating professional titles, and articles need to be published in academic journals, which costs money.
……
Among the suicide notes left by Zhao Peng, the most worrying ones are his wife and his 1 multi-year-old son.
Since Zhao Peng left, Ma Tingting didn't go to work in the radiology department of Guantao County Hospital because he was dealing with the funeral. The Guantao county government initially promised to turn Ma Tingting into a regular worker, and the school will also give their son under two years old some financial assistance.
Guantao Yizhong said that he would also give Zhao Peng's parents a certain solatium.
After Zhao Peng's death, his friends built a memorial hall for him online, and he and his current students also posted articles online to commemorate him.
The college entrance examination is coming, and Zhao Peng's class is about to enter the examination room. Students in the class left a message on the Internet during the holiday, saying that they would try their best to test their level and comfort Zhao Peng, the head teacher.
A classmate also said on the Internet: "Miss Zhao: I have finished the homework I owed a few days ago, waiting for your approval. I was wrong. "
Do exercises at 6 am in winter 10. At 5: 40 in the morning, Zhao Peng woke up from the alarm clock. Sometimes I go to school without washing my face. Before 6 o'clock, I rushed to the office to sign in, and then I went to the playground with the students to run and exercise.
When running morning exercises every day, the class teacher should follow, shout class training and slogans with the students.
Including self-study in the morning and evening, there are 13 classes every day, and at about 10 in the evening, the head teacher will go to the dormitory to make sure all the students are there, and then go home to rest after the students turn off the lights.
□ Beijing News reporter Liu Hebei Guantao reported