Beauty, a conceptual word, is somewhat fragmented by time, so I always pick it up one by one and keep it in my heart. When I chewed it carefully, I suddenly realized that beauty was around me ...-Inscription.

Flowers, from life to withering, are a kind of withered beauty. When the skirt of the flower begins to turn black bit by bit, when I leave my life brightly, I feel infinite sadness. When the flowers disdainfully pulled away from the receptacle and fell freely in a beautiful arc, a trace of inexplicable sadness also penetrated into my heart. As a result, winter, the whole winter, white and black, began to fill the human brain. Perhaps, I don't feel beauty at all, or perhaps, the withered beauty is interpreted by flowers as "watertight"? Beauty is around me, a fading of black and white.

The moon, from life to darkness, is a lonely beauty. When the light of the moon began to be buried by darkness bit by bit, when the light bid farewell to life bit by bit, I felt infinitely disappointed. When the moon's uneasiness turns into darkness, there is no aura of stars holding the moon, and a trace of inexplicable sadness hangs in my heart. So, this night, the whole night, the moon had to hum an old lyric song alone, and no one was destined to sleep tonight. The feeling of loneliness tied my heart, just like green moss, wrapped around the old tree, occupying people's hearts like that. Perhaps, I don't feel beautiful at all, or perhaps, the lonely beauty is interpreted by the moon as "everything in a glance"? Beauty, just around me, is a kind of loneliness intertwined with light and darkness.

People, from birth to death, is a beautiful process. When people get old day by day, when the soul bid farewell to life bit by bit, I feel infinite sadness. When the desperate soul fled the body and rode a ladder to the light step by step, a trace of inexplicable sadness also came to mind. Thus, a person's life is like a train that has just started. When it starts, it needs to accelerate. When the fuel consumption is exhausted, stop from fast to slow. Busy and slow, began to suppress the human soul. Perhaps, I don't feel beautiful at all, or perhaps, the beauty of the process is interpreted by the dead as "well known"? Beauty, just around me, is a busy and slow process.

Standing outside the world, we can see the unique beauty of this world. The beauty of withering and loneliness is attributed to the beauty of process. Although, the beauty I see around me is gloomy and falling. But with falling tone as the main theme, beautiful music can also be played. Flowers interpret beauty with withered life, the moon interprets beauty with dark life, but people interpret beauty with dead life. Everything in nature has dedicated its life to the earth. The same is true of people, who bloom once in their lives and wither once; When life faces loneliness; When a person's life is devoted to dedication, it is the moment when the value of life is sublimated. At this moment, I realized that beauty was around me.

Teacher's comments:

To say that this article is not well written, I will never agree; But to say that this article is a good article, I still resolutely refuse. Why? -

1, so gorgeous

It may need to be gorgeous, but as long as 1~2 sentences are enough. What would it be like for a person to wear gorgeous decorations from beginning to end?

2. Too hasty and far-fetched

I wanted to say everything, but I didn't say anything thoroughly, so the content seemed a little far-fetched (see the coloring). . . For example, if the moon is gone, what song are you singing alone? It feels like there is only one bright moon in the sky. In the third paragraph, I never understood what the author was trying to say. When people leave this world, everyone will feel sad and reluctant, but what kind of beauty is this sadness and reluctance? . . . . . Didn't say it. . . . . But no one knows. . .

3, scattered in form, prose taboo.

Prose expresses feelings, expressing emotions, focusing on the content and artistic conception of emotions. What kind of emotions and feelings does the author want to express? I don't know. It seems that I want to say everything, but I don't seem to say anything clearly! As a result, the heart is empty and chaotic, except for the gorgeous coat.

4. Develop a natural paragraph to make the emotions clear.

My personal suggestion: the author might as well elaborate a natural paragraph thoroughly in the middle term, so that the article formed may be better.

The second beauty is by my side.

When I walk on the way to school, through the cold reinforced high-rise building, and rush past people who are in a hurry like me, countless kinds of shocking beauty whizzed past us. In this hurried era, countless beautiful notes can only play boring tunes, and our eyes have lost the spirit of discovering beauty in the face of modern trends.

Have we found that countless nuances of the world are inspired by beauty?

When the bud sticks out in the breath of spring, when the lonely flower stretches its limbs; When the swarm of creatures moves again; When all things in nature wake up again and flourish, we are still in a hurry. Enchanting flowers can't attract us, nor can green wicker. When the colorful world comes again, we still walk ahead and walk into the noise, so another kind of beauty is ignored by us, a dynamic beauty full of vigor and harmony.

When we were arranged to walk into an art exhibition center, we were bored and tired like spring tide, trampling at will, and our half-asleep eyes glanced around, and strange works came into view. After reading it, I casually returned to the initial noise, and the artistic feast carefully created by those masters was also left behind, leaving dust in loneliness. We are still walking back to the bustling crowd, but we forget that there is a kind of beauty that has been drained from our minds, which is an ideological beauty that inspires artistic inspiration.

So much beauty in the world is ignored, how can it not make people sigh! Involuntary introspection: Do I often ignore the beauty around me?

When I was dealing with a mountain of homework under the light, my mother walked into the room gently, holding a cup of hot tea in her hand, then gently put it on the table, turned around and walked out of the room gently. Maybe the soft voice didn't attract my attention, so I still worked hard. It was not until I accidentally bumped into a cold cup that I realized that I had never said "thank you". The beauty of flesh-and-blood affection was ignored by me.

There used to be beauty around me that I ignored. Beauty sometimes plays a joke on us and pretends to be a companion. Friendship, affection, humanity and art … are all beautiful things in life. Beauty is sometimes short-lived, like the wind blowing through your fingers. But I often remind myself to pay attention to the beauty around me, just as I often look at the sun in cold winter, and my heart is unconsciously warm and bright.

Teacher's comments:

As for children's articles, they are well written, and there are at least three things to boast about:

The first point: have your own ideas-don't ignore the beauty around you;

The second point: I can make my thoughts clear-after reading this passage, we all know the author's thoughts, and it is not easy to make things clear. . .

The third point: there are some highlights in some details-my mother's cup of tea, just after reading the first sentence, I think the plot is quite vulgar, and it is all overused, but when I look down, there is a contrast, which is a bit shocking to a cool teacup.

However, it is good to make things clear, but if we go further, we must make things wonderful and touching. That's the ultimate goal of our writing, isn't it? ! From this point of view, there are three points in this paper that need to be improved.

The first point: it doesn't seem typical enough-the composition, the material should be as typical as possible, very, very expressive of the theme, and don't distract the reader. From this point of view, the art exhibition seems to be not refined enough to explain the problem typically, and it also affects the appeal of the whole article.

The second point: it doesn't seem concise enough-I don't like procrastination when watching movies. I say it back and forth unless it is for some artistic purpose; When writing a composition, you should also have a lively rhythm, and don't express the same meaning repeatedly. From this perspective, in fact, the first two paragraphs can use one sentence (that is, the sentence in the second paragraph). That would be simpler and more artistic.

The third point: brilliance seems to be not enough-either to impress logical thinking or emotional thinking. For details, please read my blog post about glory (this story tells us a series. . . )。

Enjoy the process.

The beautiful result is fascinating, and the process of description is worthy of appreciation. Creating beauty also creates life; Enjoy life while enjoying the process.

In the scorching time of waiting for the results, in order to release the tension in the review stage, we made an appointment to go to the book wholesale market. One is to buy some books to read during the summer vacation, and the other is to relax.

When I went, the sun was still there, and the leaves leaked some heat. The three men rode side by side on the road. For a long time, I was not bored by laughter. Point out the roadside scenery, or some interesting things on weekdays, or some interesting news anecdotes, and have a good time along the way.

Don't open it until you reach your destination. From the first floor to the fourth floor, go to some bookstores that you often go to on weekdays to find your own interests and see if there are any new books on the shelves. Occasionally, when I see a book I like, I will stop and stand in front of the bookshelf, holding the book, reading a few chapters and stories, just like a child who suddenly catches a glimpse of his beloved toy and can't take his eyes off it. A few small shops, rows of bookshelves and rolls of ink are enough. Soon, the sun moved to the sky, and it was already noon. Time spent immersed in books is always fleeting.

Having lunch in a nearby fast food restaurant, talking and laughing, fighting and laughing, talking and talking about everything, ordinary fast food is incredibly slow. The coke in the cup trembled with the girls' laughter.

After dinner, it will be much darker. Seeing that it was going to rain, I was afraid to go home, so I went back to the bookstore. Listening to the rain outside, it's getting louder and louder. It seems that I can't stop for a while, and suddenly I think of "taking a photo." Maybe girls will always be interested in these gadgets, even taking pictures, and they are very busy. There are three smiling faces in the small photo, and the happiness of youth seems to overflow.

The rain has stopped. Go home.

I rode home side by side under the light rain and the green leaves hanging with water droplets. Found today to buy books, three people are empty-handed, looked at each other, not only laugh. Although my hands are empty, my heart is full of happiness, not because of the result, but because of the joyful process. The value of life is embodied in the process.

The hermit played a song in Yangchun and won everyone's praise? Just for fun. Celebrities talk hand in hand. Who really wins and who loses? Just because of interest. Literati drunk, really drunk? Just intoxicated by the smell of wine.

Real life is not the result, but the process. Can Daiyu bury flowers to protect them from turning them into spring mud? Taibai's poems can be called "Du Li's brilliance is endless"? People have lived all their lives, but for safety, can you drive a crane to the west? Enjoy the process and enjoy life.

Teacher's comments:

1, a good horse has no good saddle, and it hurts.

This woman's writing is very good, but she is poisoned by the "point at the beginning" and writes the article very bluntly and boring. . . . At the beginning (the first paragraph), a sermon appeared. Who cares who's bored? . . The first impression is not good, who is still in the mood to read the following jokes? .

Haha, sometimes I wonder, even if we give in to the exam and ask questions at the beginning, can we ask questions in other ways, such as a rhetorical question:

Do you think the result is important or the process is important?

Then continue the following article. .

2, three articles, you must not think of it!

If a woman burns her head, she must not wear big boots under her feet. Why? That would be too bloated. It would be great if a boy wore a pair of big sneakers for a crew cut. The combination of head and tail should be appropriate.

The lyrics at the beginning of this article and the lyrics at the end of 55555 overlap, which is not exciting enough. If any one of them is simply shortened and changed, in a word, and then look at the artistic effect, it can be determined by going up a flight of stairs. For example, the beginning does not change, and the end (the last paragraph) is one sentence:

Real life is not the result, but enjoy the process and enjoy life!

See if it is more refreshing, infectious and eye-catching for the marking teacher.

I am eager to fly

I am a kite, and I am eager to fly. I said.

Flying? Kites are always flying. The friend said.

You will never understand. I said to my friend.

I always think-what is flying? I sorted it out. It's still a mystery. What is flying?

I am floating in the sky, riding the wind and clouds, rising and rising rapidly. I looked down at the ground and everything seemed so small. I am proud, because I can understand the sky that others don't know, and his joys and sorrows are in my hands. I can talk to Baiyun and play with the wind. I can hear birds singing to the sky and see the activities of people living in tall buildings. I have feelings for everything. I see the world with my own eyes.

I am flying in the sky, and I can feel my tail quivering slightly. That's my root. I love it, and I can't live without it, because it is on me and in my heart. I'm still flying, and my lungs are full of fresh air. I am very happy, I am very happy, so I rolled in the arms of the cloud a few times. But my roots trembled violently, forcing me to return to the state of flying and continue to understand the world. Suddenly, I can't fly. I can't fly high I have a feeling that I want to break free. That's flying! You must be very comfortable without anything to pull! I think. I tried to break free, but I couldn't leave, thinking of the fate of a companion breaking free.

It was a cloudless sunny day in Wan Li, and the wind was a little strong. Somehow, a companion who always wanted to shake off his roots got his wish. Its roots are broken, and the crisp sound startled everyone. But it was very happy, shouting the slogan of freedom, and kept flying and rolling. It was tired, fell to the ground and crashed. It's pathetic. Better have roots! I think.

I just fly and keep my balance. I feel good and comfortable.

Suddenly, an idea came out-root, you can hold me in your hands, but I am getting higher and higher. I am flying!

I am eager to fly, very eager, but I am also realizing my dream!

Famous comments:

After reading this article, I have three strong feelings:

1. The author's writing style is really good.

It's really good to explain things clearly, concisely, fresh and skilled.

2. The logic of the article is really messy (see black)

The tail is better than the root? It doesn't seem appropriate;

Even if it is compared to a root, if it makes sense later, it can be said that the root is used for traction and then for balance. . . 555555, it's a mess. Can't justify it. . . The mood and rhythm of readers are also seriously damaged. . . . . .

The final conclusion "root, you hug me" is not clean. . .

The author is really greedy.

I thought about it for a long time. Did the author combine the kite string with the kite tail?

I can't help it. How could the author confuse such clear things?

Or, the author knows that they are different, but still wants to add their characteristics together to enhance the aesthetic feeling and appeal of the article? 555555, if that's the case, you are really as stupid as a strange uncle, because of greed and impulsiveness. . . For this article, if the full mark is 100, I will give 65. Not necessarily accurate. )

Examination questions of the mind (the author reads the second day of junior high school)

Oh, my God, I was forgotten!

Facing the empty playground, my mood is extremely low. Isn't it because I'm sick that I don't train with you? Didn't you just sleep in the shade? Will you stop treating me like a friend? Really, what kind of classmates are these! It was dismissed without calling me!

Walking up and down the playground alone, the stones at my feet were swept aside by my complaints. Round and round, I walked out of a stone-free road on the edge of the playground. Bare, like a circle, surrounded me in loneliness. A cold wind blew and a leaf floated down from the big tree beside me. I bent down to pick it up. Oh, are you forgotten by my partner like me?

It was getting dark, and the night quickly surrounded the city like the devil. Also returned to the dormitory that I once mistakenly thought was very warm. It was dark and there was no one inside.

I threw myself on the bed with all my strength. Tears welled up and my heart was bleeding. I long for comfort, mom. I want to go home.

The bright lights filled every corner of the room. "Oh, there you are! We have tried to find it! Are you still sick? Not feeling well again? Let's go to eat. " A series of questions woke me up. A little a, ha! At that time, I didn't know where to relax, and now you come to comfort me, hypocrisy! When she saw that I didn't speak, she looked at the tears on my cheeks and the disdain and anger in my eyes. She seemed to suddenly understand, and then stammered, "Really ... angry because she didn't see us?" , return not bashful say? I gave her a white look. "It's not like that. After the dissolution, we went to another place for an emergency meeting. We just broke up, and then we looked for you everywhere. " She is sweating, and I see sincerity and friendship in the sweat. My brain is blank. It turns out that all the anger is because of my misunderstanding! It turns out that all loneliness is my wishful thinking!

I began to reflect on myself. Why did my classmates leave for a short time, which caused me great dissatisfaction? At home, I am the apple of my eye. I ask my parents for this and that, but I never think about what I want to do, which leads me to only want to be cared for by others, but forget that I have to pay. I made a lot of mistakes with my self-centered thoughts and fragile mind! Thought of here, I took the little hand and ran out happily. I want to change.

I will never forget this experience. In my mind is an examination question that teaches me how to treat people. Remember that lonely leaf? It will remain in the error correction book of my life forever.

Teacher's comments:

1. Examiner, I tested you!

Examination questions, this proposition is really "Luo" and "Pian". Although this word is not strange to us, it is mostly related to exams and is seldom used in daily life and communication. Many students may never write such articles in their works again. What does your old man mean by this exam?

The Ministry of Education has repeatedly demanded that we should not stray from the topic and must combine it with the reality of life. This is in vain!

2. Don't be silly, son!

However, as a student, there is no other way but to accept. Therefore, at this time, we must face it calmly and don't lose our minds.

Write a narrative 55555, the story about the exam questions is really hard to say, and there are not many in life. If there is, it is difficult to write, describe, expand and structure, so don't write a narrative about this proposition! ! ! ! !

Examination questions are closely related to exams in our lives. Each of us has all kinds of feelings and emotions about examination questions, such as scores, students' life roots, old exams, teachers' magic weapons and so on. . . This proposition is really suitable for argumentative writing and prose.

3. Choice decides fate

Through the above analysis, the problem of this article is clear.

-choosing to write a narrative is really a mistake. Although the material is very real, it can be said that it is a question of the soul, but it is. . . . . . It's weird, that's all, twisted! Ah, I'm blind to such good material, and I'm blind to the opening sentence "Oh, my God! I have been forgotten! " Such a suspenseful and attractive beginning! As a result, out of 50 points, this paper only got 37 points, which is considered as the second category. I think the main reason may be that the content does not match the theme and the plot logic is not smooth.

-in fact, the author's writing ability is quite good! The wrong style choice leads to the overall failure to play. . . . . . What a pity! ! ! ! ! !

Son, faced with the choice of proposition and style, have you "adapted to local conditions"?

The first article is "Fruitful Autumn" (the author was in junior high school, a few days ago was unknown).

Unconsciously, Xia girl's enthusiasm has been put for a long time, and it is close to autumn in an instant. I think the wheat in the field is ripe! Line up neatly, stand tall and straight, and walk over to wait for the harvest. It seems that the apples and persimmons in the farmland can't wait long, so they hang on the trees hard and make them all red. A gust of autumn wind blows, and persimmons shake with the wind. Ha ha! Persimmon girl must be dancing the harvest dance!

In rural areas, whether in fields or farmland, you can see a lively scene. People are busy with a bumper harvest, and vegetable babies compete to see who is big and stylish. At this time, Miss Qiu did not forget to sprinkle some "autumn flowers" to decorate this golden harvest year.

Some people say that a hundred flowers bloom in spring and autumn. Look! Isn't autumn chrysanthemum blooming in autumn? Facing the bright sunshine, they are in full bloom for pedestrians to enjoy. There are white, yellow and purple, like bright fireworks and beautiful corals in festivals. This adds a lot of joy to autumn! Autumn is particularly enchanting under the general dress of autumn chrysanthemum.

Some people say that "autumn wind and autumn rain are sad." I don't think so. I think autumn is happy and auspicious. In autumn, although there is no scene of a hundred flowers blooming and a hundred birds contending, she has another charm-maturity. Miss Qiu uses her magic to ripen fruits and vegetables. Autumn is also a painter, with fallen leaves as the pen and wind as the hand. Wherever he goes, he draws a pair of "Harvest figure". Isn't this the charm of autumn?

I love autumn, I say autumn is better than spring tide!

Teacher's comments:

1. Elegant blank has a little charm.

The child's style, in my opinion, is somewhat elegant and moving. . . Take your time, think about what you should think, say what you should say, and then gracefully retreat, saying "I love autumn, I say autumn is better than spring tide" and the full text will end!

But ... . However, after reading this article, people always have balls. . . It doesn't seem "tasteful" enough. The elegant charm just showed some signs, but somehow it was suppressed again. . . 5555, what's going on

2. It's a pity that my feelings are scattered.

Prose? It's about expressing emotions. What emotions does the child want to express in this article? You mean fruitful? Or the colors and flowers in autumn? Hehe, there is no room for two tigers in one mountain, and nothing can hold two hearts! The third paragraph (blacked out) screwed up by itself!

-the dispersion of emotions naturally leads to the choice of sentences and the coordination of styles. When reading, both rhythm and mood are intermittent, which makes people feel that the charm is not enough, not enough! ! !

3. Discovery is the beginning of success

However, through this article, you can find your own style, which is also a good harvest! -Ha ha, maybe not, just Johnson's own subjective assumption! However, personally, if the mood is more concentrated and the sentence and tone are more dependent on the charm, your composition can go up a storey still higher!

According to the standard of the senior high school entrance examination, I think this article belongs to category two or above! Haha, it may not be accurate.