Bowen also lived up to expectations. Among children of the same age, he likes reading best. Whenever there is a family reunion, Bowen's father will talk to him about what books he has read recently. This blog post is about the romance of the Three Kingdoms. When everyone asked him for a passage, he confidently told the story of "Song Wu killed a tiger" and won everyone's praise.
My cousin Xiaoxu, who just went to kindergarten, said happily, "Cousin is really something. Can you study with me? " Without thinking, Bowen glanced at my cousin's fairy tale book and said disdainfully, "This book is so naive that you know this?" I could recite the sacred amethyst when I was your age. "
After listening to my cousin's words, Xiaoxu was wronged and tears swirled in her eyes. Bowen's parents also looked at each other: how did this child become so conceited and look down on others? Maybe there is something wrong with the way of education?
It is believed that it is a common phenomenon that parents praise their children too much. In the eyes of some people, this is the embodiment of parents' "love". In fact, however, from the results, this behavior is often not conducive to the growth of children. As Wang Xing predicted, children are easy to suffer big losses. In fact, sometimes, children's self-awareness is good, or their eyes are too high, which will also be caused by other factors.
0 1 Why do children feel good about themselves?
1) There must be too many outsiders.
Children often feel good about themselves because they are often praised too much or even exaggerated by their parents. Over time, they will feel great and omnipotent.
2) Lack of understanding of their own abilities
There are still many children who lack sufficient understanding of their abilities. This is actually not surprising. Not that "newborn calves are not afraid of tigers". It is said that newborn calves are often not even afraid of tigers. This is actually because they lack understanding of their own abilities. If the calf knows that its ability is far inferior to that of the tiger, how can it not be afraid?
3) Never suffered a loss.
This is also an important reason why many children feel good about themselves. Nowadays, many children are too well protected and rarely encounter setbacks. Without the experience of setbacks, it is easy for children to underestimate the consequences of various things, because they have never suffered losses and do not know how much loss and pain they will bring once they have suffered losses.
It's not a bad thing for children to feel good about themselves, it's also a sign of confidence. However, if you feel too good about yourself, you will become too confident and have a low vision, which is easy for children to suffer big losses.
What are the dangers of children's overconfidence?
Become arrogant
A person who has a high eye but a low hand is often despised by others, because they have failed enough, so no one wants to cooperate with them. Children who feel good about themselves are very likely to become arrogant because they think they are very capable and have insufficient understanding of the consequences. Therefore, they often try tasks beyond their ability and eventually fail. This is a typical arrogance in the eyes of others.
Not conducive to the improvement of ability
Because overconfident children tend to think highly of their abilities, it is easy to be complacent and feel that they are already good at it, so they stop working hard and lose the opportunity to improve their abilities.
Easy to eat and lose.
People who are overconfident are often more likely to suffer heavy losses. Because they overestimate their own strength, they often feel that they can succeed, thus underestimating many potential hazards. However, once they really try, their strength will be really exposed, and at the same time they will be greatly hurt by failure. And this kind of damage is often great.
It can be seen that overconfidence is not a good thing for children. Parents should find ways to help their children correct themselves and let them have a clearer understanding of themselves. What exactly should they do?
How to break children's "confidence illusion"?
Don't trust children too much.
When children succeed, parents should treat them with a normal heart, don't praise them too much, and praise them rationally. You can also guide children to analyze the reasons for their achievements and possible shortcomings while praising them, so as to avoid their overconfidence and help them make progress.
Point out the child's shortcomings
When a child fails or makes mistakes, he should point out his shortcomings in time. Of course, parents should point it out calmly, instead of adding too much emotion, otherwise it will attract children's disgust. Only by pointing out children's shortcomings in time can children know themselves better and avoid feeling good about themselves.
Educate children with cases
When children are found to have signs of overconfidence, parents can tell them more negative cases to make them realize the lesson. Of course, we can also tell some positive cases of modesty to guide them from overconfidence to modesty, so as to improve their quality.
It is not good to be overconfident, but sometimes it is also a bad thing for children to be too modest. Therefore, when parents correct overconfident children, they should avoid overcorrection and make them too modest and even feel inferior. In that case, it is easy to cause other injuries to children.