There is nothing wrong with having two lives.

One is to live in the present, buy what you want, get what you want, don’t want to control your desires, moonlight doesn’t matter, and you can borrow money easily.

There is another kind of life that is lived in the future. In order to pursue greater goals and gain greater enjoyment, you can restrain your current desires and give up the temptations in front of you.

People who live in the present are instant gratification.

People who live in the future delay gratification.

01

Let’s talk through experiments first:

Professor Michel Mitchell of Stanford University in the United States obtained the theory of “delayed gratification” through the “marshmallow experiment”.

The experiment mainly gave some children around 4 years old each a marshmallow and told them: If they wait 20 minutes to eat, they can eat two.

It is conceivable that some children could not wait for a minute, and some children waited for a while, but still could not resist the temptation. Only a few children withstood the test and received double rewards.

This is really a very good experiment. It explains the weakness of human nature. In fact, each of us is the one who is about to eat the candy in our mouth when we see it.

Perhaps many people find this experiment a bit confusing. If they can be satisfied, why can’t they be satisfied immediately? Why push back satisfaction?

Here comes the key point:

People who cannot control their desires and immediately eat the candy have a low success rate.

Control their temporary desires in order to eat two. People who eat candy have a high success rate.

02

Some people think about success today and want to be successful tomorrow.

They only look at the money of rich people, but fail to see their ability to delay gratification.

Let’s take a look at a person who has the greatest ability to delay gratification.

In the Forbes list of global billionaires released in 2019, Zhang Yiming, the founder of Toutiao, surpassed Huang Zheng of Pinduoduo and became the first self-made rich person born in the 1980s in China.

After Zhang Yiming graduated from Nankai University, he started as a programmer and became such a brilliant Toutiao in just six years.

A series of products such as Douyin, Huoshan Video, Wukong Questions and Answers, and Understanding Cars that we often play are all products of Toutiao Company.

Regarding the issue of when Toutiao will go public, which is widely concerned by the outside world, Zhang Yiming said: "The issue of going public is a relatively big matter. If you want to delay gratification, you have to wait a little longer."

"Delayed gratification" is the most important and lowest quality of Zhang Yiming, the founder of Toutiao. In Zhang Yiming's life algorithm, the most important word is "delayed gratification."

Zhang Yiming said: " Half of the problems in many people's lives are caused by this - lack of delayed gratification. ”

Life is a process, and success is also a process.

If you are satisfied with small successes, you will promote big successes.

What is small success?

03

If you have a low degree of delayed gratification, you will not be able to concentrate on doing one thing.

In the era of information explosion, you cannot control your desires and resist the temptation. . It is really difficult to satisfy oneself by watching videos and playing games.

Many people would rather give up their future or even lifelong happiness in order to choose immediate pleasure.

Is it possible? Delayed gratification is not just as simple as restraining desires, but is related to a person's future.

People who know how to delay gratification always know what they want and what is important to them and what is not. Therefore, they can make more rational choices.

They will decisively eliminate factors that hinder the realization of their goals.

Will is the nemesis of temptation.

If you want a better future, the first thing to do is to control your desires.

"Delayed gratification" is not mysterious, it should be standard for adults. Only by transcending temptation can we overcome all hardships and achieve success.

04

Many people are always looking for shortcuts to success instead of working hard to make themselves valuable.

Why do people look for opportunities to make quick money?

Because immediate pleasure is more tempting.

Too many people enjoy everything every day, and then use the mentality of hourly workers to dream of becoming Jack Ma by falling into the sky.

The best shortcut is to work hard,

While others are buying, you are learning;

While others are doing Douyin, you are writing articles;

While others are pursuing present enjoyment, you are pursuing future enjoyment.

People who work hard will not be a person who consumes value, but a person who creates value for the world and themselves.

There is also a kind of ridiculous instant gratification person who also sees that the future is a world of knowledge.

So many people spend money to buy so much knowledge, but still cannot change the reality at all.

Remember, real knowledge has nothing to do with spending money.

Only by delaying your own satisfaction can you achieve continuous growth and turn yourself into a valuable person.

05

If you want to gain your ability to delay gratification, you must set your goals bigger and higher, and don’t stop or stay for the immediate salary and hard work. Don’t forget to control yourself in order to pursue immediate enjoyment while you are still in the same place. We are aiming for greater satisfaction in a few years.

You must be responsible for your future, know what kind of person you want to be, know what you do and what you don’t do.

In terms of resisting instant gratification by setting goals, Warren Buffett once said in an interview that he practices this through a rule called "10:10:10."

Before setting goals, he will ask himself how he will make decisions in ten minutes, ten months, and ten years. The path of least resistance is not necessarily the best way.

Okay, please take ten minutes and ask yourself, what will you accomplish in ten months? Who do you want to be in ten years?

If you ask clearly, you will know what to do.