However, the author believes that Lao Zeng's letters from home are written for himself to relieve pressure, just like Nightcrawler's crying is not used to scare ghosts, but to encourage them.
Everyone knows Lao Zeng's inspirational quote: "Knock out your teeth and swallow your blood." Suffer some setbacks and grievances, catch your breath, and try to catch your breath later. This is a positive explanation. However, from both sides of things, we are also accumulating emotional garbage and feeling depressed. People who are tolerant and work hard to succeed are often people who like to sulk.
Zeng's character is analyzed from his mother's generation. Zeng's old mother, surnamed Jiang, lived in her mother's house, had no food and clothing, and married the Zeng family, but she was very unhappy economically. Jiang has a strong personality and likes to give himself courage. Kindness is the language of self-improvement. There is also a lot of silent anger.
Dad is a coward and is often scolded by grandpa. He may have been moping.
Some negative factors in Zeng's parents' personality still have a negative impact on Zeng's eldest brother. Zeng Guofan also explained in his letter1854165438+127 October: "I have been an official in recent years and handled military affairs, and there are often many gloomy endings in the middle. Every time, a mother tells her child that "there is no place to vent." "It can be seen that Lao has always been influenced by his parents and is a sulking person.
He used to be competitive, but he likes to show gentleness and respect. No one is stupid. If you like pretending, someone will stab you. For example, in the fourth year of Xianfeng, the Xiang army conquered Wuhan, which was a great event. Old people also have real power. In charge of Hubei, he served as the governor of Hubei, with financial and personnel rights on one side. He also has soldiers in his hands. Should he show off in an ostentatious manner?
However, Lao Zeng thought very far. One thought he was in Dai Xiao, and the other thought he wanted to show the virtue of modesty, so he wrote to ask him to resign from the court. I thought Emperor Xianfeng would praise me, but I didn't expect Xianfeng to be a wise man. A law exposed Lao Zeng's hypocrisy and modesty: "I knew you would resign." I know you're a little upset. Some people are expected to resign.
"There are still too few good reputations, and illegal crimes are very serious and should be strictly enforced." It is very serious to directly scold Zeng Guofan's good reputation. Therefore, officials should be exempted from their responsibilities and severely criticized. This is the crutch that Xianfeng gave him. Can you answer your criticism? Sulking has been decided.
Zeng Guofan summed up the suffering of his life like this. We saw this diary: "19 1 1 was reviled by the elite in Beijing; Guizhou Jiayin was reviled by Changsha; Chen was reviled by Jiangxi. "All their experiences were abused and scolded by powerful people in Beijing, and they could not talk back; Being scolded by green camp in Changsha, you can't talk back, and you will die if you talk back; Growing vegetables and grass in Jiangxi was scolded like a beggar, but he couldn't talk back.
I endured it, but before the curse was provoked, anger came up and piled up in my heart layer by layer. This is not speculation, but Zeng Guofan's own testimony: "I never say it, but endure it." You are angry. Stop it, just bear it. Obviously sulking. How depressed, how uncomfortable. He likes to sulk. How could he be sent away? How to turn it into positive energy?
Angry, so it is hard to say that this is just "self-improvement." Promotion is a long-term thing, but there must be a clear channel for immediate emotions, and Lao Zeng has to rely on words at this time.
For example, Zeng Guofan was denounced as a "good name" by Xianfeng, and Lao Zeng's emotions were vented in a letter to the fourth brother in September of the same year. He wrote, "People have a good name, who is better than me?" Everyone has a good name. Everyone is like me. This is obviously a criticism of Xianfeng, showing dissatisfaction. But you can't complain in a letter from home. Long live God.
So I explained and comforted myself by saying, "If I have a good name, then people will have an unattractive name, an unreachable and beautiful name." In contrast, beggars' gangs are embarrassed. "
The emperor called Lao Zeng a "good name" and Lao Zeng felt very embarrassed. But from a dialectical point of view, Lao Zeng's reputation is good, and someone must take responsibility for it. There is a simple reason. Your ability shows the incompetence of others. In contrast, people are more embarrassed than me. In the old man's letter, such a contrast made me feel relieved. At this time, Lao Zeng rose to the height of personality cultivation: "My brother is cautious and always saves time."
Be careful in the future and hide your tail deeper. Then, it becomes a prospect for future work: "The river can be cleaned quickly and thieves can be smoothed out." It can clear the Taiping rebels on the Yangtze River and put down this riot. The uncertainty in my mind has been eliminated, that is, I am not afraid.
I was scolded by the emperor and felt weak in my heart. However, writing here, my dissatisfaction was dispelled and I found a way. I give myself courage and am not afraid. It can be seen that Lao Zeng's letters play a great role, which can not only solve the sulking, but also improve the quality.
If you are worried about something, write it down, put it in front of your eyes, and become an object that can be observed objectively. In other words, it is a good way to objectify the subject from "but to which corner of the mountain" to "outsider".
If you talk to yourself, you may not relax. However, if you are facing family members and younger generations, you must put yourself on your brother and parents and educate them. You must inject positive energy and find a solution to sulking. Therefore, when you become the spiritual wealth of your family, you will unconsciously sublimate your grievances and overcome your fears.
Zeng Guofan was bullied by his colleagues in Jiangxi, and the soldiers were also doormats. In Xianfeng's four-year letter, he always lamented that his team "would be cursed and poisoned every time he went to town", but he was a big brother after all. When he confided his troubles to his younger brothers, he should set a good example for them, so he clearly pointed out his proper attitude: "But bear the burden of humiliation and yield."
In the face of insults, you'd better keep silent and do your job well.
Writing letters from home can also help you express your guilt and depression. The most unpleasant thing in my last life was in Jiangxi. In the seventh year of Xianfeng, he mentioned in his letter to his younger brother: "He stayed abroad for several years and suffered great losses. He is ashamed of the gentleman in Jiangxi. " The old man is trapped in Jiangxi and is at a critical juncture. His father's death helped him. He left with grief and filial piety.
A few years later, the old man had a heart attack and wrote a letter to his brother who was an official in Jiangxi at that time, expressing his guilt. If you offend the elite of a province, you must be weak inside. If you have this letter from your family, you will also have the courage to feel guilty.
The book not only gave Lao Zeng confidence, but also gave confidence to his relatives. Since the Tseng brothers invaded Nanjing, the whole world thought that Xiang had no rivals and had not recovered, but they played a pair in 3354.
This resourceful and brave northern cavalry defeated the Tseng brothers in the north, lost divisions, and constantly lost land. The court was furious and accused Lao Zeng's younger brother Ceng Guoquan of "poor planning".
In the fifth year of Tongzhi (165438+ 10/8), I always wrote to my brother late at night, asking him to be brave and put forward his famous saying: "Knock out your teeth and swallow your blood." He believes that his younger brother was defeated by the Nian army, "just like pulling out his front teeth." He advised his younger brother to "just talk and don't do it, stick to it." Xu Tu is self-reliant. "
Six years later, my cousin died in battle. He wrote to his younger brother, urging him to be a "tough guy in the sky" and "grit his teeth and motivate himself".
These words are for my brother's courage and for myself. My brother was punished after losing the battle. Is he okay? Of course, if you want to give your brother courage, you must be told. He enumerated the lessons of past failures and insults, and then said to his brother, "Nothing. Didn't I go this way? "
Zeng Guofan's letter to his family is actually to write down his fears, worries and pressures, materialize them and discipline himself and his children. Therefore, Zeng Guofan's letter is also written for himself.
Zeng Guofan is always a gloomy person. Although this temper made him submit to humiliation, it also did harm to his health, especially when dealing with the religious plan in Tianjin in his later years. The gas swallowed is likely to become something on the body one day.