First of all, the story of crow's law
It means: if a person can't face up to his shortcomings and don't change them, problems will always haunt him. The world gives people two eyes, one to see the world and the other to hide in the bottom of my heart. It is a compulsory course in our life to constantly examine and reflect on ourselves.
There is such a fable that crows say goodbye to pigeons and say that they are moving. When the dove asked why, the crow said helplessly, "Because people here think my cry is too ugly, I am not welcome to stay." The dove pondered for a long time and said, "But if you go somewhere else, will everyone welcome you?" And this is the famous "crow law" in psychology.
Second, the reason of crow's law
Many people seem to be like this, and they always like to find reasons when they encounter things. Maybe it's because I accidentally bumped into the corner of the table when I was a child. Adults always swear at the corner of the table and say, "This corner of the table is too bad. It should be beaten." Therefore, when we grow up, our marriage is not good, and we naturally attribute it to our family background; If the work is not smooth, spit out your talents; When encountering bumps, they lament that they have been calculated ... In short, these people will never see their own shortcomings, but they can always pick out countless shortcomings of others.
But as the book "You can't be crazy at will in this life" says: "Before we accuse others, we must first understand a truth: Can we stand the rhetorical questions and tests of others?"
Third, how to overcome the crow law
1. Change your mind and reflect on yourself frequently. Writer Liu Tong said, "If you think life has played a joke on you, maybe this is a good opportunity for you to stop and reflect on yourself. Trying to change one's mentality from "victim mode" to "responsible mode" is the first step out of the strange circle of complaints.
2. Change your thinking and act first. Carol Dwek put forward two kinds of thinking in Lifelong Growth: fixed thinking and growth thinking. When you change from fixed thinking to growth thinking, you also have the ability of self-renewal.
3. Change your habits and read more books. Mr. Jiang Yang once said, "The main problem with you is that you read too little and think too much. Reading is a good medicine to cure everything. Those books that have been read will melt into the blood and become part of the impenetrable truth of temperament. All unavoidable problems, all problems encountered in life, can be found in the book.
Fourthly, the enlightenment of the law of birds and crows.
Blame yourself with the heart of blaming others, and forgive others with the heart of forgiving yourself. What has happened, even if you blame it again, will not help, and will only add to your troubles. Learn to put yourself in the other person's shoes, examine your own heart, stop blaming, and learn to tolerate, so that life will become smoother and smoother, and the road of life will become wider and wider. Don't dwell on bad things. Voltaire once said, "It's not the distant mountains that make people tired, but a grain of sand in their shoes." "Don't pester is not cowardice, but let go.
None of us can change the existence of rotten people or the development of rotten things. Can change, only their own mentality. The success or failure of life is up to you. Only by learning to change can you become better and better.