What affects a person's life is your personality, your world outlook, your values, your patience, your confidence, your perseverance, your mood, your mood.
So is modern society. There are many prodigies. Everyone says that he is smart and a child prodigy, but he is not as promising as people think. No, why?
Although some students are also very smart, they are withdrawn, weird and unsociable, and are not suitable for cooperation. Some people feel inferior and fragile, unable to face setbacks, some people are impatient, stubborn, conceited and emotionally unstable, and some people are indifferent, irritable and neurotic, making it difficult to communicate with people around them. In particular, some people take me as the center, everything is me, me, me, not caring about others, not caring about others, and always like people around them to revolve around one person. There are also many people who are not very intelligent, but they are not too smart. Even people think that he may have a low IQ, but later he became a great cause, a great hero and a great success.
Let's lift the veil of EQ and see what EQ is. 1990, two American psychologists, Bede Lalawi and John Meyer, put forward the word "emotional intelligence". At that time, they mentioned that emotional intelligence was emotional intelligence. Friends, what does EQ mean? What is EQ? For a long time, people have always had a mysterious feeling about EQ, which makes it difficult for us to approach EQ, grasp EQ and embrace EQ.
EQ is abbreviated as EQ, and IQ is IQ, so what is EQ? Emotional intelligence, emotional intelligence, emotional intelligence, emotional intelligence. That is to say, we often say that reason, wisdom, rationality and understanding mainly refer to your confidence, your perseverance, your perseverance, your patience, your intuition, your adaptability, your cooperative spirit and a series of reflections related to people's quality. Mainly psychological quality. He is a person's ability to feel, understand, control and use an emotion to express his own and others' emotions.
Emotional intelligence can be expressed through a series of abilities. Daniel Gorman, an American professor, wrote the book EQ, and he classified people's EQ into five abilities.
First, the ability to know your emotions, that is, you have to know your emotions. Some people call it emotional consciousness.
What is the second emotional intelligence ability? We should properly manage our emotional ability, and don't let our emotions get out of control, emotional, emotional and uncontrollable.
The third ability, self-motivation ability.
The fourth ability, the ability to know other people's emotions. We should not only control our emotions, but also look at others' emotions. This is called taking care of him, taking care of yourself and looking at others. Look at people's emotions and look at them from left to right.
Fifth, interpersonal skills.
So this Gorman put forward five emotional intelligence abilities.
A great nation and people must be educated and cultivated, and so must people with high emotional intelligence. There are many ways that EQ is higher than training. In my opinion, there are five methods that stand out. First, train emotions and emotions. Train your emotions and emotions. How to train? I think there are several suggestions. First, cognitive emotions. I just talked about recognizing emotions, then analyzing emotions, and then evaluating emotions. It depends on your emotional shortcomings. What are the disadvantages? Next, control emotions and mediate emotions, emotions, emotions. Don't have ups and downs, don't be moody, keep an emotional stability, and don't get carried away when times are good. Don't be dejected and depressed in times of adversity, but take it easy when you are hit.
We have the following specific suggestions. First, we should control our anger. In fact, emotions are human nature, and anger is a manifestation of intense emotions. It can have some advantages and people can get angry. We wrote "Man Jiang Hong" written by Yue Fei, and he was angry. Isn't he angry? It is imposing and has a deterrent effect, but it is often bad to get angry. Including being a leader, including being a parent, is often angry, bad for study, bad for work, bad for life, bad for interpersonal relationship and bad for health. Some people say that anger hurts the liver. What methods do we often use? Strengthen psychological control and improve self-cultivation. What is a trick? Angry, out of control, out of control again, a little trick, procrastination, procrastination, what else can we do? Transfer method, transfer it.
What other tips are there? Count, count, one, two, if you want to be angry, one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, count slowly until you are not angry. Some people say that if you count to 60, you won't be angry. Try it. Count to 60.
What is the other way? If you go to the toilet, you will get angry. Whether you pee or not, go to the bathroom and squat for 20 minutes. After squatting down, your mind will be very peaceful. Although it's indecent, you might as well have a try.
Then there is rational control to exercise your self-control ability, and what's more, to cultivate your world outlook, outlook on life and values. What about anger in the first place?
The second is to overcome tension, pressure, contradictions, conflicts, risks and crises, which easily make us nervous. Excessive tension is not good for work, health and life. What are the emotional methods to overcome nervousness? Have correct goals, communicate and coordinate, learn to enjoy, and participate in some civilized entertainment activities. Come to our CCTV to listen to the report. It's all good.
Third, to avoid impatience, it is mainly to cultivate your patience, have appropriate goals, relax and calm down, and learn to deal with it coldly.
Fourth, get rid of negative emotions, cultivate your own positive emotions, enthusiastic mentality, open mind, sense of accomplishment, and have fun.
Fifth, vent reasonably, because the pressure is too great, you can control, control the explosion in your heart, control the explosion in your stomach, and you can vent appropriately. Use words and actions to vent bad emotions in your heart and keep your mind balanced. This is also the way, what should I do? Go to an empty mountain, shout at the mountain, vent, do exaggerated actions when shouting, relax and vent.
We are practicing psychologists now. In fact, psychologists, most of us can become psychologists. You are all the best psychologists in Ceng Laoshi. What do you mean? Psychologists listen patiently to patients' voices most of the time. As long as he has a good audience, he can be psychologically changed by psychological patients, and the miraculous effect is to listen to him.
Sixth, learn to relax. What are the main ways to relax? Learn to relax. Humor is one of the most important ways to relax. Be humorous. Humor can especially relieve mental stress and psychological stress. I wrote a book at 199 1, a humorous book, at the beginning. Humor is a kind of relief, you can get rid of it when you look at it, and it is easy to take it off. At the end of this book, I wrote a passage like this. Friends, don't forget to give humor as an advanced gift to others.
Seventh, we should take care of other people's emotions, not only our own, especially our primary and secondary school students. We should pay attention to training in this field. Some people don't care about other people's emotions when they are excited.
Eighth, we should create an emotional environment. Students' emotions and feelings, as well as those of our descendants, are largely cultivated and trained by their schools and families. If the family is harmonious, the teachers are kind, the classmates cooperate and the society is harmonious, it will have a great influence on the students and our young people. This is an invisible training, silent training, and extremely important. Although he is invisible and silent, the Tao is invisible, but it is tangible, and more is told in silence than in their voices. This is the first of the five ways I said, to train our emotions.
What about the second method? Learn to deal with interpersonal relationships. Friends, dealing with interpersonal relationships is a thick gobbledygook. Some of us haven't finished reading this book completely when we reach the end of our lives. So how to deal with interpersonal relationships, I have the following suggestions. First, tolerance is better than a million soldiers. Second, put yourself in another chair and put yourself in another position. Third, learn to care. Fourth, full of love. Fifth, be compassionate. Sixth, communication and coordination. Seventh, honesty. Eighth, be good at cooperation. Ninth, be willing to bear hardships. Losing is a kind of spirit. If you lose, you can get it if you pay, and you can get it if you give up. Tenth, sacrifice. This is the first method I talked about to develop EQ.
What is the third way to cultivate and develop EQ? Be optimistic and open-minded, be good at being optimistic and open-minded, be fun, be fun, what is your mood, optimistic or pessimistic, which is an important aspect of EQ. This is an important factor in getting emotional intelligence, so some people say that optimism will turn defeat into victory, while pessimism may turn victory into defeat.
You really have to find your own happiness. You have to find your own happiness. I can base my happiness on the development of our unit, the prosperity of our whole nation, the success of others, my own success and my success in helping others. That's all. I am really unhappy, but from another angle, he may be happy. From another angle, I will turn unhappiness into happiness.
There is an unhappy old lady. Why is she unhappy? She is worried and anxious. She is worried about her two sons. She has two sons, one sells umbrellas and the other dyes cloth. It's raining, and she's anxious. Why? It is raining. Why is my eldest son's cloth hanging dry? Doesn't he dye cloth? How to sell my second son's umbrella on a sunny day? She is anxious when it rains, and when it is sunny. Everyone is anxious and anxious. A wise man said to her, think from another angle. You are happy when it rains. My second son's umbrella can be sold. I'm glad the weather is fine. My eldest son's clothes are dry. I am happy, I am happy when it rains, and I am happy when the sun is shining. Let's put it another way.
What is the fourth method? The fourth way for us to train EQ is to be proactive. A person with high EQ is self-motivated, enterprising and always full of hope for the future. Full of hope, for the future, for society, for the motherland, for the nation, for the unit, for myself, for the family and for life.
French writer Mo Bosang famously said that people live in hope. Hope may be a positive thing, even a dream. A nation that can't even dream is a hopeless nation. Every one of us is dreaming. Sweet dreams. I hope to make more money tomorrow. I hope the report submitted tomorrow will be better. We are all dreaming. We have woven dreams, worked hard, interpreted dreams, pursued dreams and fought for them. I will make up another dream to interpret it and realize it. Full of hope. Friends, go to the zoo to see when peacocks look best. When the screen is on, it's best to look smug. After gloating, don't look at the front of it, look at the back. Not good at all. After the front screen is opened, is the back bare? You don't look at the front, look at the back. You say peacocks are ugly, and you don't want to see the best naked front.
The fifth way is to be kind to life opportunities. Some people say that people with high IQ will find opportunities, people with high EQ will seize opportunities, and people with high adversity will not give up opportunities easily.