Concerning the issue of human nature, Confucius has a famous saying: "People are similar in nature, but habits are far apart." The formation of human character is different due to the influence of acquired habits and environment. This is a materialistic point of view. Confucius taught students that they must choose friends and neighbors, because making friends has three benefits and three losses:

Confucius said: Three friends will benefit you, and three friends will harm you. Friends who are straight, friends who are understanding, and friends who are knowledgeable are beneficial. If you have friends, you will be brave. If you are friendly, you will be gentle. If you have friends, you will be sycophantic, which is a loss. (Chapter 4 of "Ji Shi") (Confucius said: There are three kinds of beneficial friends, and three kinds of harmful friends. It is beneficial to make friends with upright people, make friends with honest people, and make friends with people who are knowledgeable and knowledgeable. It is harmful to make friends with people who are serious on the surface but evil at heart, to make friends with smooth and flattering people, and to make friends with smooth-talking people. ) The key to the benefits and harms of making friends is what kind of friends you make. It is the most common social experience of the Chinese people to make good friends and not to make bad friends. "Those who are close to vermillion are red, and those who are close to ink are black" has been a long-standing motto, and the spirit of this motto is not outdated now.

Confucius talked about the issue of choosing friends and neighbors many times:

Confucius said: Benevolence is the beauty. How can you know (wisdom) if you choose not to be benevolent? (There is a question mark here) (Chapter 1 of "Li Ren") (Confucius said: It is better to live in a place where there is a trend of benevolence. It is better to choose a place where there is no trend of benevolence and virtue. , how can it be wise? (There is a question mark here)) Zigong asked about benevolence. Confucius said: If a worker wants to do his job well, he must first sharpen his tools. If you live in this country, you will be a wise person serving its officials and a benevolent friend to its scholars. (Chapter 10 of "Duke Ling of Wei") (Zigong asked Xiuren. Confucius said: To do a good job, a craftsman must have good tools. When living in a country, he should work for virtuous officials and make friends with virtuous scholars. People.) Confucius said: If you have no friends who are worse than yourself, don't be afraid to correct them. (Chapter 8 of "Xueer") (Confucius said: Don't make friends who are not as good as yourself, and don't be afraid to correct your mistakes.) These three chapters all talk about choosing neighbors and friends, and use the word "work desire" in terms of personal moral cultivation. "To do something well, you must first sharpen your tools" is used as an example to illustrate that choosing friends and neighbors plays an important role in people. However, he did not make it clear when he said, "There is no friend who is worse than yourself." If we interpret it literally, it means not making friends with people who are not as good as you, but looking for people who are worse than you, and looking upward. Aren’t there some people who have no friends and cannot get help from their friends? (There is a question mark here) From social progress From a personal perspective, you should take the initiative to make friends who are less knowledgeable than yourself and help them improve. Confucius's students also discussed this issue:

Zengzi said: A gentleman uses literature to make friends, and friends to help people. (Chapter 24 of "Yan Yuan") (Zeng Shen said: A gentleman makes friends with his articles and knowledge, and uses his friends to help him practice benevolence.) Zi Xia's disciples made friends with Zi Zhang. Zi Zhang said: "What does Zi Xia mean? (There is a question mark here)" He replied: "Zi Xia said: Give it to those who can, and reject those who cannot." Zi Zhang said, "It is different from what I have heard. A gentleman respects the virtuous. I am tolerant of others, I am kind-hearted, but I cannot tolerate others. If I am a great virtuous person, why should I not be tolerated by others? (There is a question mark here) If I am not virtuous, people will reject me. How can I reject others? (There is a question mark here)." "Zi Zhang" Chapter 3) (Zi Xia's disciples asked Zi Xia about making friends. Zi Zhang said: "What did Zi Xia say? (There is a question mark here)" replied: "Make friends with those who can make friends, and those who cannot make friends." "I refuse." Zi Zhang said, "It's different from what I heard. A gentleman respects the wise and tolerates everyone. He praises the good and sympathizes with the incompetent. If I am a very virtuous person, there is nothing I can't accept from others." What? (There is a question mark here) If I am an unvirtuous person, others will reject me, so how can I talk about rejecting others? (There is a question mark here)") Mencius also extended Confucius's views on this issue. "Mencius Ten Thousand Chapters Part Two": "A good scholar in a locality will be friends with the good scholars in his hometown; a good scholar in a country will be friends with the good scholars in the country; a good scholar in the world will be friends with the good scholars in the world." Good scholar, It can be interpreted as outstanding people, outstanding people with national influence and outstanding people with local influence, each has its own scope of friendship. In reality, this phenomenon is not uncommon. National celebrities make friends with national celebrities. Most celebrities in a small county can only find friends within the scope of their own activities. It is difficult for a young literary man to make friends with literary masters who have global influence. .

Of course, this is not absolute. Lu Xun once made friends with some literary young people and helped them selflessly. There is another famous saying by Confucius worth noting:

Confucius said: If the Tao is different, there should be no mutual conspiracy. (Chapter 40 of "Wei Linggong") (Confucius said: Don't discuss with each other if you have different opinions.) Since each other's positions, opinions, and principles are different, it is impossible to discuss issues together, and it is impossible to make friends.