Growth is a topic we pursue throughout our lives. It is a process with no results visible in a short period of time.

In this process, we have to endure self-denial, ridicule and even blows from others, but if we want to grow, these problems must be overcome. How to do it specifically? You can refer to the following 5 books. These are the books I must read when I am confused or frustrated.

Li Xiaolai, the author of the book, believes that the reason why we encounter various problems as we grow is because the concepts of the past are no longer sufficient. At this time, we need to accept new knowledge, redefine and upgrade the old ones. Operating system, this process requires us to brainwash through reading and wash away old or wrong concepts.

For example, after we work hard for a period of time, we will feel confused and even complain if we don’t see the results. Why do others get results with their hard work, but I only feel depressed?

Li Xiaolai believes that this is due to the failure to realize that growth is a process of continuous accumulation and advancement. There is almost no harvest in the early stage. Only by crossing the cost line can there be results. There is no gain, which also means that the accumulation is not enough, and many skills are complex. It seems to be one, but to do it well requires the cooperation of several skills, such as writing. It’s not just that we write it down. We also need thinking, observation, logic, communication, etc. to work together to write a good article.

In addition to solving the confusion during growth, this book also gives the direction of growth and some basic common sense about investment. For example, if you want to become an outstanding person, you need to cultivate multi-dimensional competitiveness, surround yourself with powerful people, and always keep hope in yourself, etc.

Many of the concepts in the book will be encountered by most people, and the author explains them in a relatively simple and easy-to-understand way. He explains these issues in language that everyone can understand, and sometimes uses his own personal experience to illustrate. It can give us great inspiration.

No one does not yearn for growth, but most people will give up after working hard for a period of time, thinking that they are not talented enough.

After investigating the growth process of famous figures such as Mozart, Beckham, and Tiger Woods, Thayer Matthews, the author of "The Illusion of Genius", discovered that the so-called geniuses are just bigger than others. Most people go the extra mile.

Mozart’s father was a musician. Before training Mozart, he had already mastered a set of effective training methods through training Mozart’s brothers and sisters. When Mozart was three years old, he began tutoring Mozart full-time on the piano. Mozart hadn't even celebrated his 6th birthday yet, but he had already practiced for 3,500 hours.

Children are inherently malleable, and with his brother’s tried and tested methods, it was difficult for Mozart to become famous.

Most successful people in this world do not rely on talent. Einstein was also a scumbag. He couldn't speak at the age of three. He was often punished by standing still when he was in elementary school. He had to repeat a year before passing college. His grades were often at the bottom. After graduation, he couldn't find a job and was squatting at home. It took two years before I found a job through someone else's introduction. But none of this affects his success. Talent has never been a necessary factor for success.

We envy others when they have achievements, but don’t want to work hard or give up on a whim after working hard for a while, and then deceive ourselves and say, “I’m not that good” or “I have no talent”. These are just because we don’t want to work hard. It's just an excuse, just like the famous saying on Zhihu, most people don't work hard enough to compete with talent.

"The Illusion of Genius" tells us that being obsessed with talent is a cognitive trap. Success is always a process of deliberate practice, overcoming various psychological barriers, and internalizing skills.

The subtitle of this book, "How to Become a Great Person," attracted me immediately. I have always wanted to be a very powerful person, but after working hard for a long time, I am still ordinary. Why didn't I become my ideal self? What is the gap between me and those powerful people? With these questions in mind, I opened this book.

The author of the book is Caitong, who has a PhD in psychology from Zhejiang University. Many contents in the book are from a psychological perspective, telling us why we are not great, such as doing one thing to the best. Most people believe that just about anything is enough, but powerful people just do it and do it to the extreme. This result naturally leads to the fact that we are no different from other people.

This book starts from 7 aspects: time, choice, action, learning, thinking, effort, and creation. It analyzes the existing situation of most people and proposes how to improve. Each part is introduced. Very detailed. Like Li Xiaolai's "The Road to Wealth and Freedom", this is also an inspirational book, but the content presented is more detailed.

What touched me most was how to read. Caitong believes that reading should be like decoding, not only to know what the content is from the reader's perspective, but also to analyze how to present the content to the reader from the author's perspective. The way I read is like a bystander. Without in-depth and detailed reading, I naturally feel that many books are useless.

This book may not make us become great people, but at least it will let us know the reasons why we are not great.

Courage is a very important thing. With courage, we dare to put forward different opinions, ask questions when we have doubts, and let ourselves grow. However, most people tend to care too much about other people's opinions and dare not speak up when they encounter problems. The fear of asking questions and making others feel stupid, the fear of making others think we are shallow and ignorant, and the fear of being criticized for asking inappropriate questions all hinder our growth.

The authors of "The Courage to Be Disliked" are Ichiro Kishimi and Fumiken Koga. One of them is a philosopher and psychologist, and the other is a writer. In the book, Fumiken Koga considers himself a confused young man. He solved his confusion by asking for advice from the philosopher Kishimi Ichiro. The whole book uses a dialogue style to illustrate that we lack courage because we care too much about other people's opinions. The right courage.

We always want to be recognized by others, work hard for their recognition, and live the way they expect. However, growth is our own business, and we must learn to be responsible for ourselves. This requires us to stop pursuing the approval of others, learn to separate tasks, and know that growth is the most important, and what others think is his business.

By doing this, we can calmly face various problems encountered in growth. Don’t be afraid of questions. Only by finding the answers can we grow. From now on, we will no longer be afraid to ask questions, because growth is our own business. Even if we are laughed at, it is worth it if we grow in this way.

In addition to not being afraid to ask questions, we also need to find our confidence. A long-term lack of courage will make you afraid to try anything, which also leads to missed opportunities.

How to regain confidence? That is to establish your own community (can be understood as a small group, such as a community), provide help and dedication to others within your ability, find value and gain confidence in the other party's heartfelt recognition.

In addition, the book also talks about the constraints that the past, relationships and the future have on us. These are also important reasons why we don’t feel happy. What can we do? The author tells us in the book: The right to choose is in our hands. When we are freed from these, we will find that we have always been free. It turns out that it is ourselves who really hold us back.

This is the only novel among the 5 books, with a Douban score of 8.7. The author Doudou uses the love between Ding Yuanying and Rui Xiaodan as the main line and tells the story of how the male protagonist Ding Yuanying led a group of young people into the business world and turned an unknown small company into a world-famous large company. In my opinion, the most important thing about this book is that it reveals how people should face opportunities when faced with them.

Ding Yuanying is a business wizard. In order to give his girlfriend Rui Xiaodan a gift, he decided to set up a company with a group of young people in Wangmiao Village, which not only helped the locals get out of poverty, but also led several young people to grow up.

Wangmiao Village is a famous poor village. Many people are struggling, and in the end they still live in poverty. The capable young people are opening shops in the city or looking for other development opportunities, and the rest are the old, weak, sick and disabled. The arrival of Ding Yuanying made them feel that they had found a savior, and they could get what they wanted as long as they followed Ding Yuanying. However, in the end, I discovered that no one is the savior. The only one who can save myself is myself.

Liu Bing is the company's driver and office director (although he calls himself one). Faced with such a good opportunity, Liu Bing only focused on enjoying the glory brought by this opportunity. He felt that driving the company's car, a BMW, was the life he dreamed of. He no longer had to work hard and was unwilling to put in any more effort. But what he doesn't know is that the company's cars always belong to the company, and only what he obtains through hard work can he always own.

However, the manager Ye Xiaoming realized that this was an opportunity and knew to seize this opportunity to work hard to improve and devote himself to the company. Although I kept trying to change, in the end I was too afraid of losses and missed the good opportunity to grow with the company.

Xiao Yawen is a classmate of the heroine and a former subordinate of the hero, but he is able to find opportunities in crises, take action bravely, and try his best. Of course, she got what she wanted in the end.

Everyone looks forward to opportunities, but when opportunities do come, we, like Liu Bing and Ye Xiaoming in "The Distant Savior", rarely seize the opportunities. We tend to think that once the opportunity comes, we will definitely get what we want, and we don’t want to make any more efforts at all. If we don’t continue to work hard after the opportunity comes, then we will just take advantage of this opportunity to take a look and return to the starting point. To borrow the original text from the book, I took a look at the edge of the well and then retracted it.

Fortunately, there are many opportunities in this era, but how to deal with them requires everyone to seriously consider.

These 5 books solve most of the problems in our growth process and should not be missed by those who are eager to grow. If you also feel confused or have been hit hard, I suggest you read these books. They allow us to regain the courage and motivation to continue on the path of pursuing growth. Just like a sentence in "The Shawshank Redemption": At any time, the only one who can really pull you up from the abyss is yourself.