Lin Yutang has a healthier and wiser view of marriage and love, which is the key to keeping his family in order. As we all know, Chinese writers in the 20th century generally regarded "love liberation" as a measure of human liberation, and gradually developed it into a belief or myth, that is, love supremacy! Therefore, family, marriage and ethics are ignored for the sake of "love" Morality, abandoning the "old" love for the "new" love, disregarding the love of others and even life and death for the sake of one's own "love", reaching the point of "giving up life and forgetting death" for the so-called "love". This is what people often regard as golden sayings: "Marriage without love is immoral" and "If you don't have love, you'd rather die". Therefore, "love first" has become the theme of Chinese literature and culture for a century. Generally speaking, a marriage based on love is certainly better than a loveless marriage, but it is wrong to make love absolute or even a myth. Zijun in Lu Xun's works became a victim of the concept of "love first"; Mingfeng in Ba Jin's works committed suicide because he could not get love; Miss Mei and Juexin were also depressed for life because they could not be united, living a life of endless taste; and more What's more, in the works of contemporary Chinese writers, love relationships with triangles, four corners or even more corners are everywhere, and life-and-death fights between them are not uncommon. Lin Yutang believes that this view of love is problematic and even alienated, because it understands love and marriage mechanically, one-sidedly and narrowly. He said: "People who look for romantic interest in marriage will always be disappointed." "People who do not pursue romantic interest and focus on being good and optimistic partners will get it unintentionally." (33) He also said: " Married life is not completely bathed in honey, half of it is made of rice... You have to break the dream as soon as possible. The sooner you abandon the crazy dream of being a young schoolgirl, the sooner you are determined to be a lively, cute and amiable companion. Good, because romance will soon become a reality, and lovers’ mutual compliments must turn into a couple’s life of love and respect for each other.” (34) In fact, in a fundamental sense, love is a snack and marriage is a meal. The problem of modern people is that they eat love as food and marriage as snacks. As a result, "love" changed one after another, and the age of the beloved wife became younger and younger. However, divorce was faster than marriage, and happiness and happiness became increasingly elusive. Lin Yutang believes that the correct approach should be the opposite, that is, eating marriage as food and love as snacks. And, more importantly, love is created. A marriage without love can also achieve happiness through hard work. The key lies in whether the husband and wife can respect, love, respect, appreciate and create each other.