People who have lost their loved ones need to be redeemed, but more importantly, save themselves. Many times friends can comfort you, accompany you to listen to your unhappiness, listen to your sadness, and take you to see better and more beautiful things, but it is you who can really take you out. Although I am sad, I am willing to open my heart and come out slowly with the help of my friends. I think this is a better situation.
In short, try to keep a good mood, watch movies, plays, read books, brush Weibo or learn something else, so that you can get busy and enrich yourself, and you won't have so much time to mourn.
If you are really unhappy, you can talk to your friends more, but I personally feel very sad. I don't want to pour too many negative emotions on my friends. I will tell my friend to help me spend this day or two with me, and then I will share more happy things with people around me. After all, if you are surrounded by happy people, your mood will be better.
Many times I don't know how to comfort my friend's loss. But it seems to be to accompany her to do what she wants, even if both of them are silent, just let her know that someone is with her and hope that she will get better. If she is willing to change, she can adjust herself.
If you are really sad and don't want to change ... there is nothing you can do. You can get used to it after a long time. Maybe the surrounding environment will change and become better.
An analysis of the causes of mourning culture
Network media analysis:
We have also seen a lot of research on the post-90s generation. The environment in which they grew up is that the social and economic development of China has entered a new stage. They have experienced various pressures, such as exam-oriented education, pressure to enter higher schools, employment difficulties, economic transformation and so on. They understand the global dynamics through the Internet and have long known that this is a risky society.
Different from other times seeking external expansion, the post-90s generation knew that external expansion was risky. Moreover, they enjoy better material conditions, their family and employment relations are flatter, and external expansion is not necessary for them. They often say "I" and "Be yourself and be an independent individual".
Internet tools have become an outlet for them to vent their emotions. Some people release their inner personality through the internet (inner personality here refers to inner thoughts), and they release negative emotions and cynical ideals online. However, this "I" in daily life seems to have nothing to do with the "I" on the Internet. They look like two different souls with the same body.
But there are more people in another place. They are young people who are unified inside and outside-I am who I am, and I am a complete, independent individual who dares to speak for myself.
These young people, who are integrated inside and outside, are happy to be themselves, and do not need to play the perfect image of the "three good youths" in others' minds, so it is not difficult to admit that they are rubbish. They accept their own imperfections, accept their own defects, live for themselves, accept such themselves and reconcile with themselves.
Images with negative emotions, such as Ge Youlie, are popular in Weibo because young people dare to forward, share, narrate and recreate, telling others that "I am such a person" and "I think lying down and doing nothing is great". Think about it from another angle. If in the past, I longed to be a person who got something for nothing, I would be ashamed to ask.
As I said before, Ge You's decadence, despair, pessimism and lovelessness when lying down are precisely the inner state of these people who are overworked, overeating, stressed and difficult to make money. The pressure is easy to understand, but why does the unwillingness to work hard caused by pressure become a national carnival? What caused them to choose Ge You to lie down and convey their inner desire?
I think this is because traditional efforts have been difficult to achieve the qualitative change of life and the rise of class. In this country, due to the high social cost, the space from the lower level to the upper level is gradually blocked. We all know such inspirational words as "you will die if you don't work hard" and "the harder you work, the luckier you will be", but we are more confident that "you will be relaxed if you don't work hard."
Such a desperate speech is the insight and trap of young people on the rise of their own incompetent "mourning culture".
Academic analysis:
The main reasons for the emergence and popularity of youth's mourning culture are the false construction of virtual network, the active stigma of youth's self, the unconsciousness of the collective and society, and the emotional contagion of consciousness and micro-era: from micro to big.
We should treat youth's "mourning culture" with a "rational and prudent" attitude, study youth's "mourning culture" from the perspective of superiority, guide young people to establish correct values and promote the cultivation of their positive social mentality.