When brother Yu (yù) was young, his father took a nap during the daytime, so he secretly took medicine and wine due to sex. His father was aware of it and watched it while sleeping. Yu bows and then drinks; he drinks without bowing. Then he asked Yu why he bowed, and Yu said: "Wine is a ritual, so I dare not not bow." He also asked Hui why he didn't bow, and Hui said: "Stealing is not polite, so I don't bow."

—— "Shi Shuo Xin Yu" by Liu Yiqing in the Southern Song Dynasty

In school, the teacher made many class rules. So why set class rules? After reading the story of Zhong Yu and Zhong Hui when they were young, I realized something.

It can be seen from "worship and then drink" that Zhong Yu is very sensible. Even if he has done something inappropriate, he can still do what Sima Qian said: "Although I can't come, my heart is longing for it." Although he can't fully comply with the etiquette, he still tries his best to abide by it. He knows that etiquette is a kind of self-restraint, not something done for others to see. "Being polite is tedious, but the meaning is to form rules and develop a solid heart."

Look at Zhong Hui again, from "Stealing is indecent, so I don't worship." and "Wine becomes a ritual, I don’t dare not to bow. "It would be rude to compare the bell. He thought that since he had already stolen the wine and committed an indecent act, why should he still observe the etiquette of drinking? Therefore, he followed his own instincts and acted as he pleased. According to historical records, when attacking Shu, Zhong Hui betrayed Jin and was eventually killed. "Irreverence is simple, and its meaning is to live a free and easy life, but it dilutes life."

I think a famous saying by the Irish poet Yeats can illustrate this problem well: "Civilization is to strive for self-control ." There is such a wonderful analysis: "It is primitive and naive to do whatever you want. Self-control allows us to understand that the self is not the only truth. Only on this basis can we have compassion and understand others. Being considerate of others and knowing how to respect others makes our humanity better.

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