As the saying goes, "As long as you know the life you want in your heart, you will understand which path you are suitable for." Everyone, almost everyone, has a unique talent in this world. and the way to go. The reason why all living beings have an ordinary life is not that they do not have the potential to change, but that they do not recognize their true colors, or are blocked by fear from the way forward.
Looking back on the past, has your childhood “dream” been fulfilled? I guess most people didn't finish it. Only later did I understand the reason. It turned out that those "dreams" were the expectations of others and society. If you don’t know what to do or what changes to make, maybe you need to fully understand yourself first. "Only when you understand yourself can you be yourself and find a path that suits you."
How do you see the world around you? How do you see yourself? How are the interpersonal relationships? How to live life? How to build confidence? ... Only by doing it, experiencing it, and then you will find your destiny path. Who can truly and completely accept everything that happens in their lives can truly start to stand at the starting point of creating the future.
Most people want to find a balance point in their lives, but in real life it is often difficult to achieve what they want. Since there is no way to achieve a balance, we must find ways to make trade-offs and show the chosen things to the extreme. We need to know what we want and what we don’t want. Only by knowing how to make choices can you achieve fruitful results in several areas of focus.
Zhuangzi has a saying: "My life also has a limit, but my knowledge has no limit. If I have a limit, I will follow the limitless, and I will die." This sentence is translated into vernacular: Human life is limited, but knowledge is vast. Boundless, pursuing infinite knowledge with a limited life will only be in vain. Faced with various issues in business management and life, we often feel that it would be better if we could understand some truths earlier. But there are not so many "ifs" in life. We must have experienced something before we can understand the profound truth of classic sayings.
Therefore, there will be many critical moments in a person's life when they face choices. Should they give up a familiar industry and change careers? Should I quit my job and start my own business? Do you want to seek overseas dispatch or further study abroad? At every moment, there are responsibilities, obligations, and things that you should do, as well as things that you are currently capable of and can do immediately. But people will have desires, looking forward to achieving more goals, completing more ideals, and having more beautiful things in the future.
Because the result of wanting everything is to get nothing, and ultimately it will be in vain. You have to make progress in life and hope to gain something, but don’t forget that with gains there must also be losses. What is lost is sometimes invisible and often difficult to detect in a moment. Whether it’s family, work, couples, parent-child relationships, relationships, etc., we can’t have everything.
Only by learning to make trade-offs, giving up and giving in appropriately, and knowing what to choose is the core that must be firmly grasped and cannot be given up, can we avoid serious imbalances in the "profit and loss statement" of life. When you truly understand that our life is a series of "trade-offs" and "choices" that create who you are, you will know how to cherish every "choice" you make.
For many of us, when we were students and before we went out into society, we focused mostly on our studies and further studies. Although there is a lot of depression in such a life, for most people, the goal seems to be very clear. Anyway, the adults around us will tell us not to think too much and just go towards that goal. As a result, many people are "at ease" and study quietly without thinking about other things.
Until one day, we graduate from school and start working. Facing a world where many people are busy, we start to feel anxious. Because, in front of us, there are so many roads to take and so many choices to make. Should I choose the job that pays well but is boring, or the job that pays low but feels challenging? Should you work quietly in one company wholeheartedly, or should you go to several companies to gain experience while you are still young?
Suddenly there are many choices to make in life, but we have never been properly educated on how to make the best choice for ourselves. From childhood to adulthood, our parents and teachers often help us make choices about which school to choose, which major to enroll in, and which competition to participate in. Moreover, we trust them to make the "best choice" for us, so we go all the way. Now that you have left school and entered the workplace, you are faced with so many choices to make. What should you do?
The parents and teachers we relied on before are no longer familiar with our professional and workplace environment after we left society, but they are still used to giving us the "best choice" in their minds. Obviously we ourselves know that it is not a good choice, but we have to face "well-intentioned pressure" from them. I no longer know what to choose, and I have to face all kinds of invisible pressures around me. I feel really anxious and hesitant inside.
This kind of anxiety and hesitation is because we have rarely had the opportunity to cultivate the "wisdom of choice" since we were young. How to accumulate such wisdom? In addition to accumulating bit by bit from our own life experiences, we can also learn from other people's life experiences to help us reflect and accumulate wisdom.
A friend asked me what a couple with completely different personalities would do for each other when they are both indispensable career leaders in the workplace and go home after a long day. Only through change can we live in harmony one day? Is it really possible to strike a balance between work and marriage?
Sister Shan is a corporate executive I met at a salon. She is a senior brand manager with 15 years of experience. With a busy work life and a fast-paced life, there is always a steady stream of new ideas spinning in her mind. She cannot stop and is very impatient. One time, Sister Shan had just finished a large-scale event. She came home and collapsed on the sofa. She was so tired that she didn't even want to say a word of complaint. At around 11 o'clock in the evening, the door made the sound of a key being inserted and turned, and her husband came home carrying a computer bag on his back.
As soon as she opened the door, Sister Shan immediately said to her husband: "Don't think that you don't have to wash the dishes because you get home at eleven o'clock." Her husband was also very unique. He coolly put down the dishes without replying a word. He picked up his backpack and walked into the kitchen to wash dishes. Twenty minutes later, he walked into the bathroom with a cheerful face and without saying a word, took a shower and went to bed. Neither of them said a word that night.
Sister Shan’s husband has a gentle personality, is thoughtful and slow in doing things, which is very different from Sister Shan’s impatience. The pace of their lives is also far apart. Sister Shan believes that one person should do half of the housework, and each person should have their own duties and responsibilities. It is only fair if they are clearly separated. Her husband felt that housework should be coordinated with each other according to each other's time and abilities, but he couldn't convince Sister Shan, so he always relied on her. With different personalities, they fell in love but were not very happy with each other.
Sister Shan gets off work on time at six o'clock every day, picks up the children at six thirty, goes to the kitchen at seven o'clock, eats at seven thirty, goes to bed with the children at nine thirty, tells bedtime stories, and returns to the computer desk at ten o'clock Continue to work overtime until eleven o'clock. The busy days come again and again, and she is already exhausted. Her husband is also busy at work and has a high position. Logically speaking, the quality of life of two people should be good, but they are not happy living together.
I don’t know how long I will live in this boring life. The relationship between the couple is as tight as a cotton rope. If both parties hold on to one end, if they apply more force, the rope will be broken. The way the couple educates their children is also a source of intense stress. Sister Shan is a tiger mother. She doesn’t want her children to lose at the starting line, so she is very strict with her children. However, her husband was very lax in his discipline of the children and often played video games with them.
The couple often quarreled, and Sister Shan realized that she needed to change, so she found a psychological counselor to help resolve her doubts. After understanding the relevant situation, the psychological counselor said to her, "Life is a long marathon. Don't ask your child to run a sprint. Otherwise, he will not be able to overcome the difficult road of life. Let your husband join in! You Isn’t it said that the responsibilities and obligations of a husband and wife are equal to each other? The same is true for family affairs, and the same is true for children’s education.”
The psychological counselor told Sister Shan that her husband is good at giving. Children's life direction, guide children to observe the scenery of life, and help children find their own talents by stimulating their potential. Sister Shan is good at forcing execution, but this does not help her children's life goals at all. She should boldly let her husband lead. Sister Shan went back and thought about it for a long time, and found that she always quarreled with her children when discussing things, but her children were very happy when discussing things with their father. Suddenly, she understood what the disagreement was between her and her husband, and that night she decided to make a change.
A month later, her husband felt that his family status had improved and he was smiling more. The children feel that their mother is no longer anxious to keep an eye on others, but is more able to relax and study, and the atmosphere in the family has also improved. Sister Shan also has more time to do what she wants to do. A change that benefits all three parties. Because of love, Sister Shan is willing to change; and because of love, Sister Shan’s excessive investment in her family is no longer a heavy shackle.
Life has no value unless you choose and give it value; happiness does not exist unless you create it. There is only one true heroism in this world, which is to still love life after seeing the truth of life clearly. Because of love, everything becomes possible, even a small change can have big ripples.