He may not be slow, but a late bloomer.
The development of the human brain is inherently different from person to person. What is important is how to let the child develop with the trend in the seemingly slow years and accumulate the details of the future outbreak, so as not to let impatience kill his future!
This is an enviable true portrayal of "the victorious group in life" and "unbearable".
Rich Karlgaard, 64, is a successful entrepreneur. He was nominated as the best entrepreneur of the year and the author of a best-selling book.
At the age of 34, he founded the first financial and business management magazine in Silicon Valley. At the age of 44, he broke the traditional media culture of seniority and became the publisher of Forbes magazine, an international media. He has a private jet license, flies all over the United States to collect writing materials, and also has his own private jet; His books such as Life 2.0 and Soft Edge are very expensive when published.
However, looking forward to the first1/4th century of his life, it is not so beautiful.
He was born in the rural area of North Dakota in the central United States. Before transferring to Stanford University, he studied in a community college.
He recalled that although he graduated from the Department of Political Science of Stanford University, he almost didn't have the ability that an adult should have, he could take on a slightly difficult job, and he didn't have the executive function that was psychologically biased towards cognition and behavior and had nothing to do with IQ.
Not as responsive as dogs.
At the age of 25, he became a guard. One night, when he was on patrol, he heard a dog barking nearby. He felt strange and went to have a look.
It turned out that his colleague, a guard, Rowena, arrived at the scene before him.
He was shocked to find that he was a dog with the same specialty as his graduate student from Stanford, and his reaction was faster than him. He was simply depressed to the extreme.
At the same time, Jobs, who is similar to his age, has almost listed Apple's stock, but he doesn't know what he should do.
However, at the age of 26, "my brain suddenly woke up and I really felt this way."
He managed to find a writing job in a research institution, and then he was able to start his own business. He was also attracted by Forbes and invited to an innovative technology magazine. Then, his story unfolds like other successful groups in life.
In his newly published book "A Late bloomer", he points out that this turning point is not unusual at all.
Everyone's brain development and the development of various abilities have different speeds and processes in different fields, and the younger they are, the bigger the gap is.
In this era of over-emphasis on whether the protagonist is a teenager or a child, don't regard slow maturity as a problem of development or ability. Teachers should not rush to deny children and give them a "sentence", which will cause anxiety, even depression and self-denial to the next generation.
The key to maturity lies in the prefrontal cortex of the brain.
This has been scientifically proved, and we must revise our previous expectations of growth and maturity.
In fact, the prefrontal cortex, which is responsible for complex functions, including planning, organization, problem solving, memory, attention and self-inhibition, is the last part of the brain.
Children often make parents and teachers feel that they are immature, lack a single-minded mind, have poor self-care ability or cannot be responsible for themselves because these abilities are not fully developed.
The prefrontal cortex accounts for 1/3 of the neocortex of human brain, which is much higher than that of other animals, so it can perform complex tasks, but some people have to wait until they are 25-30 years old, and some abilities, such as emotional control, even wait until they are 4 or 50 years old.
Moreover, Psychological Science magazine also published a study of nearly 50,000 people of different ages by neuroscientists Laura Geming and Joshua Hartshorne, and found that everyone's development order and strengths are different. People are always backward in some fields and always ahead in some fields, so it is not appropriate to judge and compare people's behavior and ability development by age and set hard standards.
How to face children who look slower and more mature later?
Instead of worrying and urging, it is better to cultivate resilience to setbacks.
Calgard reminded that late-maturing people are usually as anxious and stressed as he is. Instead of worrying and urging others, it is better to wait patiently, care more about them, observe and encourage them to develop their ability to walk faster.
In addition, we should also support them and affirm the process and learning they have experienced during this seemingly slow time.
For example, when he was in college, he often didn't know what to do. He read a lot of magazines, but it seems useless. He also ridiculed himself that his major was Sports Illustrated, but it helped him a lot when he started his business and even enriched his design ideas.
At the same time, we should continue to cultivate their curiosity, enthusiasm, adaptability to setbacks, and better fields than their peers. Don't throw cold water on them just because they haven't shown some ability for a long time.
When people keep touting young heroes, we should remember what everyone around us will look like when they are a few years old, what prizes they won, how excellent their children are, which genius went to college at a few years old, and who succeeded in starting a business before the age of 20 and how much wealth they accumulated. We should also remember that everyone who walks by will leave traces.
When you are a late bloomer, your past experience, accumulated ability or experience and interest will all play a role together, and you may not lose to talented young people.
Yogi Bella of the Yankees, who is known as the greatest catcher in the history of the American Major League, famously said, "There is no such thing as an' end' until the game is over."
Life is even more so. Don't let impatience kill the late bloomer! ?