Three plates and three things.
Understand that love, marriage and childbirth are three different things.
It doesn't mean that you must get married when you are in love, nor that you must have children when you get married. You may not want to rub them together. There is a popular saying on the internet that "love without marriage purpose is hooliganism". To be honest, it is a cancer of a woman's mind. Many women were asked to get married as soon as they entered the society, and their feelings did not develop at all. If they get married hastily, the unfortunate marriage will become a high probability event.
This unfortunate story of marriage is staged every day in this land. Passed down from generation to generation like a virus. It should be understood that the three modules of love, marriage and childbirth solve different problems, or the purpose of each module is different.
Let's talk separately.
reduce costs
One: About love:
Love should be a happy moment in life, which can help you improve your ability to establish intimate relationships and let you enjoy the time of heartbeat, happiness and companionship. The purpose of love should be to have a good love time and get a good life experience, not to get married. People who regard marriage as the purpose of love are "watching people eat vegetables". This dish is the cost of dating. Only by seeing the benefits in advance will the cost be invested. This is not love, but a deal.
What makes you anxious to get married and have children is basically to reduce costs, complete transactions quickly, and reap the fruits of marriage and children.
Second, about marriage:
Marriage means that two people don't want to end their beautiful love relationship, want to experience the next life together and decide to "tell the world" with a ceremony.
Love is a simple "beautiful activity" only related to both parties, but marriage is a social system. Marriage is not an upgrade of love, but a complex social and economic relationship and legal responsibility and obligation. Marriage is not an upgrade of love, but an extension of fireworks. In short, marriage is very concerned about the equivalence of emotional value and economic value.
Because as long as you get married for a long time, you can understand that passion will disappear, but emotional support, smooth communication, matching of thinking, economic coordination and mutual civilization are the longest.
Third, about fertility.
Finally, the module of giving birth. First of all, I emphasize that the inevitable result of love is not necessarily marriage. Similarly, the result of marriage is not necessarily having children. Because having a baby is a brand-new module. Women are not allowed to make mistakes when giving birth to children.
Fourth, the ability to choose.
Your marriage is not going well, you can leave. It's really nothing But with children, things are very different. If you don't give up your children, you will be wronged in this wrong marriage. It's not easy if you give up your children. Any mother who gives up her flesh and blood will suffer great psychological torture. At this point, there is no room for change and it will always be a loss. And the root of all this is that women should do their best first. Make yourself stronger, make yourself emotionally independent, economically independent, time independent and think independently, and you will have the ability to choose.
Both men and women will eventually find that they are either married to someone else or married to someone else. But married to yourself, or married to yourself. Because what level you are, what kind of person you are, the other white person is roughly the same level.