There are no leftover women in the United States, not that all "marriageable" women are married, but that single women are not paid special attention to by society and will not be called "leftover women"; For many of them, celibacy is a lifestyle they choose. Some of them are single because they insist on waiting for the ideal marriage. They have no collective anxiety, and they will not be analyzed, sympathized or ridiculed ... Some time ago, I saw that many domestic media were discussing the topic of "leftover women": psychologists and sociologists discussed in depth the reasons for the existence of leftover women and the ways to solve this problem. Some men criticized the so-called leftover women for their high vision and being dumped. There are also many so-called "leftover women" who are eager to go on blind dates or break through the castle of "leftover women" by other means. Many girls who are only 24 or 25 years old are actually very worried. They classify themselves as "leftover women" and then try to marry themselves in a hurry. Of course, there are also a few older women who are proud of their own conditions.

Personally, I have certain requirements for marriage, but not very high requirements, but rather casual and safe requirements, because I feel that the ideal marriage is always difficult to meet; But I admire the perseverance and determination of those women who persistently pursue the ideal marriage and do not hesitate to "stay". Moreover, if a woman is completely independent economically and spiritually and has a life she likes, marriage can make her life more perfect, and there seems to be no big regret if she is not married.

I think it's because our cultural concept of "men should be married and women should be married" still occupies a major position in society and our subconscious always requires everyone to live according to certain convergent social values. If anyone doesn't, then he/she violates this law, and people have to analyze what's wrong with her!

In the United States, there are many unmarried men and women of all ages, even many people in their sixties and seventies have never been married. I think some of them may want to marry themselves, but older unmarried women have not attracted great attention from the society, and even few people gossip behind their backs, and there is no mention of "leftover women" and collective anxiety. I don't think this is American nobility. In my opinion, its profound reason comes from its culture and American concept of love and marriage:

1. Culturally, the culture that Americans have been irrigated since childhood is independence, including women and even the elderly (the author's previous article "Don't help the American elderly easily" introduced that even the elderly are proud of independence). This independence includes economic, spiritual and even independent thinking ability, and they are proud of relying on themselves for everything. At home, there are still many families who instill in girls the education that they should study hard, be good at learning, or even be beautiful, and marry an excellent husband with a successful career in the future. Many social media also guide girls in this way. For example, they comment on the marriage of stars and measure which star is more successful by whose husband has good economic conditions. American women are generally more independent than us. They are never the "innocent girl" type, but independent and powerful individuals who are opposed to men-independence is a very important quality for them. If a person is independent in everything, strong in heart and very clear about the life he/she wants, he/she will not try to find support.

2. Americans have no idea of getting married on time, and they are not required to live a life that conforms to the values of most people. The United States is a country that absolutely advocates personal freedom and personality freedom (in my opinion, it is even a bit excessive). Men are over 30 years old and women are over 278. Unmarried people never worry. It is also common for Americans to get married in their forties. I have contacted some unmarried customers in their fifties and sixties, and I have never seen them in a hurry! Parents still hope that they can settle down, but they are not as anxious as our parents in China. People around you are not worried about them, and they don't think there is anything wrong with them. Let's guess why they are not married. Even many people choose to be single until they find the right person.

It is very important that in the choice of love or marriage partner, they pay more attention to the convergence of values, the fit of personality and the similarity of hobbies, rather than the external height, appearance and age. Westerners' marriage advertisements introduce their hobbies and personalities, and usually require their partners to be five years older than themselves. It doesn't matter if the other person has children. The women they like are rich in content, knowledgeable and interesting, while most men in China (except boys in their twenties) like young and beautiful. When they were in China, they heard a famous saying that the ideal of a successful man in his forties and fifties is to get a divorce first and then find a daughter of the same age!

4) In the United States, mature women are more appreciated in the marriage market and the job market. We had an early meeting yesterday morning,

The manager read us some customer complaints from Bank of America's New South Wales market. A customer complained that the employees in a branch were too young. He said that all those people, including managers (in fact, some employees are over 30 years old), are too unprofessional to trust them! Compared with China, including * * *, many companies are more inclined to recruit people under 35. If it is a service industry or an industry to deal with the public, it is generally required to be below 25, and the largest cannot exceed 30. American companies tend to recruit mature and experienced people over 35, so in the United States, we often see middle-aged and elderly news media anchors, older and ordinary-looking advertising "stars" and even flight attendants.

The author once had a heated discussion with an overseas Chinese male compatriot about the advantages and disadvantages of our male compatriots compared with foreigners. In my opinion, our male compatriots have many advantages, but one big disadvantage is that most of them have a "girlish" complex (and attach great importance to looks). If a 40-year-old successful man (or just a better job) remarries, most of them will want to find someone under 30. I have a divorced female friend, only 35 years old, who is excellent in all aspects, but she went to many dating websites to see that men who look a little better in their 40 s and 40 s are all marked as under 30, even if they see that the other party has similar hobbies with her, she doesn't have the courage to send letters to the other party! Many men are even proud of marrying young women, showing them around, and some people envy them.

Western men appreciate mature and independent "* * *". Compared with women with children in China, it is very difficult to find a partner. In the United States, women who lead a strong and active life alone with their children are highly respected and admired by them. My two American female colleagues (one is 33 years old and the other is 43 years old) lived with three children after their first marriage failed, and later they both married their second husbands who had never been married.

For another example, Obama's wife is admired and appreciated by many people in the United States, Europe and Africa, but few men appreciate her in China. The author saw an article analyzing why Michelle can't be popular in China, and the analysis was really thorough: the article said that the reason was that most men in China still didn't appreciate mature, capable and powerful women. In their eyes, young and beautiful girls are the objects that men like and chase.

Source: Little Ladybug Net