At the beginning of the month, I bought two books of "Antifragility", one is "Antifragility" written by Nassim Nicholas Taleb, and the other is a collection of psychology articles "Antifragility: Doing A man with a strong heart." I felt that the latter book was easier to read, so I read "Antifragile: Becoming a Strong-Inner Person" first.

Although it is a collection of articles, I gained a lot after reading it. It made me very interested in psychology, and I also studied psychology courses.

Nietzsche famously said: "What doesn't kill me makes me stronger." I agree with many of the golden sentences and opinions in the book, so I have excerpted some of them. Although it may not be a wise saying, it brings me thinking and inspiration.

1. Five signs of psychological maturity:

Feel emotions, do not pretend to cover them up.

Independence of judgment.

Independence of decision.

Economic independence.

There is a sense of boundaries.

2. The so-called strength means being able to manage your emotions

If you don’t become emotional, you can win in the end.

Delayed gratification means that in order to pursue greater goals, obtain greater enjoyment, or reduce more losses, we can control our desires and give up the temptation in front of us.

Emotionality is the psychological "urination and defecation" of two types: violence and cold violence.

In other words, it is not the emotion itself that causes harm, but the letting go and acting on the emotion.

A successful person must first possess the ability to delay gratification

. That means being able to withstand loneliness, setbacks, and success, being prepared for danger in times of peace, resisting temptation, and moving forward unswervingly toward the goal.

3. The golden rule of relationship

The golden rule: treat others how you want others to treat you.

Seeing and being seen.

4. No matter how bad things are, you can still find positive meanings in them.

You attract negative energy friends.

Don’t treat your friends as trash cans.

Everyone has an ideal self.

You can’t say no in a relationship, the relationship must be pleasing.

If you don’t want to stay away from a friend with negative energy, you can also reform him.

We all long to be understood.

No matter how bad things happen, they also have positive meanings.

5. What if others don’t pay attention to and recognize you?

When we are very eager to be noticed, we are actually paying attention to others and paying too little attention to ourselves.

The desire to be affirmed means that the sense of self-worth is not high enough and that one is unsure of one’s own value, so one desires to get a sense of certainty from others.

When we care more about what others think of us than we care about others themselves, it is impossible for us to truly understand love and appreciation.

You can treat other people's "likes" of you as a fun game, but don't take it seriously.

Completely liberate yourself from the eyes of others.

The feelings of love and pain are always given by yourself.

You have all your essence!

6. Don’t expect changes in others to make yourself feel better.

1. The sense of value is not borrowed.

2. Have a very stable sense of self-worth.

A stable and flexible self means that on the one hand, we have a stable sense of self-worth that is not affected by external evaluation; on the other hand, it means that we will not limit our self-concept and can flexibly adapt to our needs. Express and develop multi-faceted selves in different situations.

3. Only people who lack a sense of value want to control others.

A good person will first be someone who takes care of his own feelings and loves himself, rather than someone who sacrifices himself to satisfy others.

7. If you lack a sense of boundaries, your life will be in constant trouble.

There are only three things in the world:

Your own business, other people’s business, and God’s business.

You can only do your own thing, don’t rely on others.

You can only respect and accept other people's affairs, and you should not interfere with them.

It’s God’s business. Cooperate well. When it rains, you should go out with an umbrella. If you are born in a poor family, you must learn to live a simple life.

8. When is it easiest to develop skills and wisdom? It’s when we encounter troubles and challenges. So those "bad" people - those who create troubles and obstacles for us, torture us, and make us suffer, are actually helping us grow. Only those who challenge us can force out our wisdom and abilities. ”

This book tells how to get out of a fragile mentality, thinking habits, and behavioral patterns from various relationships such as workplace relationships, intimate relationships, and family relationships. There are many life examples that explain the profound things in a simple way. It talked about a lot of psychological knowledge.

Becoming a mentally strong person starts with changing your way of thinking and facing life with a positive and sunny attitude.

May we all become mentally strong people.

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