Introduction: The following are the classic funny quotes about workplace interviews that I have collected. Everyone is welcome to read and refer to them!

1. What is your favorite university course? Answer: "Animal Husbandry" Study” and “Flattery Study”. "Animal Husbandry" made me realize what productivity is, and "Flattery" made me understand what production relations are, which benefited me a lot.

2. What can you bring to our company? Answer: Set an example and make all employees feel that they are the happiest people in the world - the whole world envy me.

3. What are your salary expectations? Answer: I am a cow type - I eat grass and squeeze out milk.

4. In addition to salary, what other benefits attract you the most? Answer: Overtime! - Whoever asks me for money will be in a hurry!

5. What do you think about overtime? Opinion? A: Working overtime can prolong life. Working overtime is good for health. If I don’t work overtime, I will vomit, have diarrhea, feel dizzy and have cramps. Working overtime can help me lose weight (beauty). Working overtime can relieve traffic pressure. Working overtime is good for family planning (conducive to world peace). )

6. How do you win customers? Answer: A. A mouth that can turn straw into gold bars; B. A face as thick as a city wall; C. A heart as black as the bottom of a pot; D. Hands as spicy as mustard.

7. What do you think of loyalty? Answer: I am the boss’s dog, guarding the door of the company. I will bite whoever he asks me to bite, and I will bite as many times as I am told.

8. When work requires you to devote your body, how do you face it? Answer: Hee! I don’t tell people early about such a good job! I am still in the transition stage from "Lenovo" to "Pentium" --One hundred percent "canned goods". What? Canned goods? You don’t understand, hey, it’s the kind that’s unopened, cold on the outside but fanatical on the inside. Anyway, idleness is idle. Isn’t there a famous saying: "A knife will become rusty if it is not sharpened, and a brain will not fall behind if it is not sharpened."

9. How is your physical condition? Do you have any history of disease? Answer: It depends on who you compare with. You will be better than a mule, but you may be slightly worse than a dinosaur. There are no other problems at all - I dare to ask: Is workaholicism a disease?

10. As an interviewee, please give us a score. Answer (shy and shy): You are a fish, a duck, a wild goose, a shy flower, a closed moon, an enchanting country, a beautiful city, more beautiful than a noble concubine, more charming than a concubine, slimmer than a concubine, more fragrant than a Xishi, more beautiful than a Zhaojun - the disadvantage is that the rate of return is too high, and it is easy to cause traffic Hidden danger. (To the female examiner)

11. Why did you apply for this job? Answer: I was a lost mule before, but now I have found an organization.

12. How did you know that we were recruiting for this position? Answer: In addition to having a body like a mule, a qualified employee must also have a sense of smell like a hunting dog.

13. Why should we hire you? Answer: I eat less and poop more.

14. What do you think is your greatest advantage? Answer: Being as hardworking as a mule, as hardworking as a worker bee, and as loyal as a hunting dog.

15. What do you think is your biggest weakness? Answer: Except for working, you are an idiot.

16. What is the sentence that best sums up yourself? Answer: Don’t treat me like a human being!

17. What do you know about our company? Answer: Basically Everything is perfect, but there is a small flaw in the management: I once pretended to be a salesman of your company and made more than 100,000 yuan, but no one found out.

18. What a talent! Apart from this, what other criminal records have you had? Answer: Eating, drinking, prostitution, gambling, cheating, cheating, kicking in widows’ doors, digging into ancestral graves, basically nothing.

19. Scarce talents! So what achievements have you had in the workplace? Answer: I once sold a roast duck that had been smelly for a month to an old man, and then sold him a batch of fake medicines, and also sold I gave him a coffin, and finally, when he died, he gave me a large inheritance - sorry!

20. Classic case! It can be included in the MBA teaching plan. Who is your idol? Answer: In the past, it was CEO He (Arsenic), Boss Zhou (Papi), Boss Huang (Shiren), Boss Nan (Batian), Boss Ge (Langtai), and now it’s our X Boss.

21. What is your greatest ideal? Answer: Return to slave society and find yourself.

22. What is your motto? Answer: Only workaholics can survive.

23. What do you think about reporting to your young boss? Answer: That is my blessing - I am a grandson. They are young, but they can grow up in seniority.

24. Can you do your past work better? Answer: Of course you can. I think I have been challenging myself. In the past, I worked fourteen hours a day. Now my goal is to work eighteen hours a day. Hour.

25. Generally speaking, what qualities do you think a qualified employee should possess? Answer: Mule-like physique and patience, dog-like sense of smell and loyalty, wolf-like enterprising spirit, and snail-like appetite.