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How to be a good woman
Liu Fang said: "I have been married for 27 years, and my relatives and friends around me say that I have a happy family. No matter how much I have, a small family is my most precious wealth. I will never forget three words my father said to me before I got married. First, get married and start working. There are six sisters in my family. My sister is the boss and undertakes all the housework. The rest are all boys. I am the youngest daughter. Whenever they let me work, I am lazy and often carry books on my back. Even when they arrange me, I look at my father and he will protect me. Before I got married, my father was most worried that I didn't like work. Second: Never give people trouble. I thought at that time, we are going to get married, so happy, how can we give people trouble? Third: Never make people laugh. Now that I think about it, don't make people laugh. It's really what Disciple Rules says: Moral harm makes my parents feel ashamed. If I don't live well at my in-laws' house, my parents may be the most shameful. After listening to the words father, I got married. At first, I didn't feel anything special. After three months of marriage, my husband was transferred from an ordinary worker to a department. In the supply and marketing cooperative, his work began to get busy. Six months ago, my father-in-law had a new house and moved, and this small home fell on our shoulders. I don't feel anything special. The young couple are quite happy. Some people say that the honeymoon period of marriage is eleven months. Later, I thought it was true that I really got married. I think when a family is in trouble, it is one child at a time. When the child was born, her husband was very happy and offered to take on the housework. On the seventh day, I went downstairs to the bathroom and saw my husband smoking on the threshold of the corridor. I can feel him a little depressed from behind. After lunch at noon, I said: the child is very obedient and knows to sleep. My body has recovered very well. Go to work in the afternoon He was so happy that he went to work in the afternoon. I wash diapers, clean floors and do housework myself. It is not safe to sleep from two months until the child is two years old. Sometimes when I wake up eleven times in the middle of the night, I just sit and sleep, unwilling to wake my husband, because he is also busy outside. Ever since I had this child, I have made a rule for myself, not to sleep late, to get up at five o'clock every morning, to wake up the child when the time comes, to cook dinner for my husband, to write a note, to shine shoes, and everything is ready. My children and I left quietly, sent them to my mother's house three and a half years ago, and took the children to work after three and a half years old. My son and I both know that dad wakes up late, and we always have a gesture, don't make any noise and let dad sleep. Marriage is an important turning point for girls, and housework is particularly important during this period. The shirts worn by my husband and children never go out without ironing, and I always help them clean their shoes, which is still the case until now. Even if I have an aunt instead of me, I am used to many things. When I go out, I will polish other people's shoes before I go. The formation of these small habits is very helpful to straighten out a family. When the child was young, we took him out to play every Sunday. After coming back, we quickly cleaned up the bedroom and let them lie down and sleep. I lean on it, too. When they are asleep, I must close the door and come out to do housework. My principle is to try to finish the housework when they are asleep, and I try to have time with them when they wake up. I often share it with many sisters and friends. When I do it, I will do it in obscurity. Stop nagging. I can't have any complaints. If I complain, my husband will be very angry. If a man is short of breath, his ambition will not last long, but he can't let his husband suffer at home. My husband is arrogant and sometimes irritable. As a woman, in addition to doing housework, she is helping her husband do his thing and educating her children. So when he has some questions, it is very important for us to give him some hints skillfully. If you go out with him, be a supporting role, don't talk too much, and save face for your husband. The more anxious he is, the more likely he is to lose his temper, and the more we should slow down and be soft. We don't need to point out his problems to him, he will be gradually changed by the atmosphere we create. My husband likes smoking. Married for 27 years, smoking 2 1 year. Whenever my son closes the door of the room after falling asleep at night, we will chat and watch TV together. He will smoke one by one, and the room will be filled with a lot, so he will open the window and let it in. He will smoke four packs of cigarettes at most. I didn't say a word. Because my father told me that smoking is a man's hobby. When a person is ill, he can't even smoke, which means that he is very ill. I thought it was a man's hobby, so I didn't say anything Just six years ago, he had a bad cough. Many friends say that Fang Zijie's passive smoking is harmful to his skin and body. From then on, he never smoked again. Some problems of men don't have to be corrected by force, but they will be adjusted by themselves. 1988, Mr. Wang did a good job in foreign trade. At that time, he brought a big brother in the foreign trade industry. By 199 1 year, eldest brother asked to do it separately. I saw my husband was in a bad mood after he came back, so I whispered, Are you tired recently? He said: Big Brother said to do it separately. I said: then divide it! He said that he still wants 300,000 yuan. I said, then give it to him! In fact, I have never been in charge of finance. I don't know how much is more or less. I have no idea. The only thing I want is not to annoy my husband. He still looked at me after I said it, but I felt that he relaxed a lot that night. After a few days, he did a good job, and then everyone was all right, just like in Disciples' Rules: property is light, resentment is not born, words are forbearing, and anger burns itself. Later, I didn't do well because the separation had any impact on business. We have been married for many years, but the atmosphere of the whole family needs our women to take some responsibility to straighten it out. Because this is the first step for us to do housework and straighten out this family atmosphere after marriage. For any child, as parents, we have two aspects, one is physical companionship and the other is spiritual companionship. What do you mean? Being with children means that when we are with him, we must create a safe, relaxed feeling and a pleasant atmosphere for him, which is particularly important. Sometimes I hear some friends say: I'm off tomorrow, I'll take care of the child and let him finish this and that. I must take care of him, otherwise he won't do well. At first glance, the atmosphere is different. In fact, it is rare that we accompanied him when he was young. Through companionship, he felt a sense of security and a happy mood, and the child's character was also well shaped by us. Later, he went outside to do things, which helped him to some extent. When my son was two years old, I formed his first good habit, that is, he was very casual at ordinary times, and he had to sit down every time he ate to get food. Unlike today's children, grandparents feed and have good physical strength, and they have to run behind him and feed. When he was five years old, I accompanied him to learn piano. Because I can't play the piano, I followed him, followed the teacher and sang with him, which aroused his interest in playing the piano. When he was six years old, he formed a second good habit. After waking up every day, he will make a schedule for the day. When I woke up today, he would never forget when I had breakfast, played the piano, studied and watched TV. He wants to go out to play with cars and watch TV. I respect all his hobbies. I think he can do something well in a certain period of time, which is to cultivate a quiet good habit for him. So when he was six years old, he got up by himself. Sometimes little ass might just stand there naked and start writing. Later, he went abroad to study. He said that his mother had a very good habit. He will now get some things done in a certain period of time. There's another one I told you about. Children grow up slowly, and we can't control them with our eyes. It is very important for us to know him, respect him, communicate in time and understand his needs. When he was seven or eight years old, we occasionally had a family meeting and three people sat cross-legged on the bed. I did a self-examination first. After listening to my self-examination, he quickly said that he had done something wrong and exposed some bad habits he had developed at school, such as being criticized by the teacher and being punished for not completing his homework. At this time, dad is like a judge, telling his mother what to do right and what not to do well, and what children should pay attention to is very helpful to him. We can't force the child to behave, but we should understand him and straighten out his thoughts. Thirteen-year-old child in a rebellious period is willing to be a man and show himself. When a child makes a mistake, we should try our best to understand and assist him before telling him the truth. In fact, it is easy for children to understand in a pleasant way. One of my biggest weaknesses in teaching children is that I spoil them too much. As long as there is no problem with ideology and morality, I will be extremely happy. Then I study well and play the piano well, so I don't ask too much, so I never let him do housework. I hate that all meals are fed and all shoes are tied to him. I prepared everything for him in advance, and I love my children. After they went abroad, they suffered a lot and learned to cook and wash clothes. When he returns from London University, he will practice in China for one year, and he will definitely go abroad for further study. But in this year, I thought from my heart that I did this little thing and there was no need to let the children in, but my father always had this idea and wanted to let the children into our enterprise. At that time, we opened nearly 20 beauty salons in Qingdao and started to open them in Shenzhen, and we really wanted to let our son in. I used many methods, including the communication between Professor He and his son today, and also talked with some graduates of Tsinghua Peking University about the frustrations of working in China, which touched some. But he said that his mother was the most distressed. One day, he said, mom, I can't see you when I wake up. You really did it when you came back so late. Because we are usually very friendly, and sometimes we even fight with each other. But when it comes to this sentence, I told him seriously: Son, my father and I have been working very hard on this for years after you left. Although we didn't do very well, it was really bitter. After hearing this, he started from that meeting, helped me get some data, made some software, got to know our company, helped us in the planning department, and came in slowly without knowing it. At first, I did heavy work, delivering towels and following cars, and then I worked in the planning department for nearly two years. The child is as diligent as his father. I didn't expect him to work so hard. Then after the second year, we put the heavy burden on him and became the executive general manager of the enterprise. I retreated to the source, continued to do training in our Fang children's school and gave lectures to our employees from time to time. Being a mother is being a teacher. We are a family business, but in the enterprise, we are very clear about everything, who does what, and we are really assigned according to positions like obeying leaders. Now that my son is the executive general manager, I will go as soon as he arranges for me to give a lecture. I will do whatever he needs me to do. I think mothers should create a good growth space for their children and don't let them feel depressed. As a wife and mother, I have been trying to create a relaxed and happy family atmosphere. That's how my career started. When I was 40 years old, I was in poor health, so I stopped working and went home. Just after three months, I felt particularly bored. I remembered that sentence: young people are not easy to live in prosperity, middle-aged people are not easy to live in danger, and old people are not easy to live in adversity. My husband and I discussed going out to do something. One day, he came back to pick me up and said that there was a women's beauty salon to be transferred. We went, and people said, look, your wife's skin and personality are too suitable for beautiful women. As soon as people said that he thought it was ok, he bought me three beauty salons, and I became the hostess of this beauty salon. But a little time is enough, and it didn't take long for one family to close down. I said these two are almost done. Let's do it again. I want to say that I appreciate your help. One day I was sitting in a beauty salon when a customer came in. This customer is 32 years old. As soon as I came in, I said I was divorced and asked me to help her fix the spot on her face. At that time, I had a feeling that if she was not cured, she seemed to be unable to live. From that day on, I studied hard and studied hard. I don't understand cosmetics, so I do experiments on my face. I'll wipe this today and that tomorrow. One day when I returned to my mother-in-law's house, her mother-in-law said, why is this face like a rabbit? Red meat is exposed and peeling! I tried various methods and took it for two years. Later, I knew very well how to use cosmetics. During that time, I really felt that I had eaten all the cosmetics, and I also had some suggestions on the teacher's efficacy and therapy. From wife to mother to daughter-in-law. A polite greeting between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is the most beautiful distance. We can't ask too much of this mother, but we can't care too much about this mother. When I get home, they all know that they always call mom and dad before the sound comes. It is well said in Disciples' Rules: You must tell when you go out, and you must say hello when you come in and out. Every time I go back to my mother-in-law's house, I try to put my work clothes in my bag. As soon as I entered the house, I went to work in the kitchen. I hope I cooked the rice at that table myself, maybe it was the last one, maybe it was earlier. My husband said to be brave, but everyone was happy and did it. So far, I have done something outside. Our sister-in-law, I'm going home now. As soon as I got near the kitchen, she said, don't come in. You have soup. I'll come after you have a rest. This is because she gave us a big table of food. The other is that we should care about our parents-in-law. For example, on holidays, we will buy them a new dress and give them some gifts. I think this is basically what each of our sisters can do. I think we'd better do all these things as a system. The year before last, just before the Spring Festival, my mother-in-law opened the wardrobe and showed it to me: Liu Fang, look at my clothes. Never buy clothes this year. I said yes, but my mother said no. As a result, when we came home from school in the first day of junior high school, I felt uncomfortable when I saw my mother wearing old clothes. I just ate some rice and said to my husband, come on, let's go out for a while. We went to the mall to buy a sweater and vest for my mother, and ran home to put it on for my mother. I felt that my mother was really happy. Sometimes our parents often say no, you don't want this and he doesn't want that, so we still have to do something. We can't be too real. In fact, we didn't spend much money on these things, but they felt really happy. For example, China New Year is usually lucky money. One year, we said at the beginning that children now give old people lucky money, and then we will give each old man a red envelope during the Chinese New Year, which may not be much, and then write a blessing, which makes him very happy and feels very happy during the Chinese New Year. The money may have been paid, but this bag has been kept until now. So the old man also needs us to understand his spirit and do such a small thing. The feelings between them are in a very harmonious atmosphere. In fact, Mr. Wang has arranged the life of his parents. He bought an apartment, including all the monthly living expenses, which should be arranged in real time, even if there is one. My father-in-law is an old man who graduated from Tongji University in Shanghai, and has made great contributions to the research of communication. Because of his identity, he would never let his wife go out to work. He thinks it disgraceful for him to go out to work, so my mother-in-law has no job all her life. I don't care how much my husband gives me, I will give my grandmother a hundred dollars from my money. Later, after I came out to do the beauty industry, my eldest brother worked in the internal finance of our company. I told my eldest brother to send grandma's pension home every month. My eldest brother has never forgotten all these years. This is how we arrange these small things for the elderly, so the family is relatively dull and there is no big deal. /kloc-for 0/2 years, what I have been most concerned about is our corporate culture. From the first day of school, you should teach your child how to dress up, comb her hair, wash her face, sit, walk, stand, look and behave from these simplest aspects. Up to now, within three days of entering the door, the child must have recited the Disciples Rules, that is, the girl's appearance must be very correct. Because women are the source of the world, it is particularly important to grasp them when they are still girls. All the girls know that we have a proverb: there is no woman's business between women. This woman's business is not petty, but constantly expanding her mind. They often call them colleagues. Song: Colleagues can't be wrong. Colleagues are wrong, I must be wrong; If I am not mistaken, it must be because of my fault that my colleagues are mistaken; If it weren't for the fault of our colleagues, we would have a good life. Between people, between sisters and sisters, they are so caring and tolerant. After learning the songs of colleagues, change the songs of lovers to face customers and friends. Some sisters said that it was not good after her husband came. She said that I would recite the couple's songs to you: my husband can't be wrong. If my husband is wrong, I must be wrong. Then some people say mother-in-law, and it can't be wrong to change to mother-in-law. I often take care of my customers and friends with some heart-nourishing cultures I have learned. I always feel that I just gave this love to my children, and when they enjoy it, they can pass it on to our customers and friends. Therefore, it is our slogan and motto to convey beauty with our heart. In the atmosphere of love, I think each of us, business people, should have a grateful heart. /kloc-for 0/2 years, we paid taxes from tens of thousands to hundreds of thousands, and now millions. We want to be a very formal company. So we also pay salaries to regular companies. My salary is 20 thousand, 3000 yuan a month to pay taxes and 3000 yuan to my mother. Then I saw some girls getting married and having children. Our team has a love fund. Girls consciously pay 10 yuan to the love fund every month, and we will help whoever is in a hurry and who is in trouble. I think there are more and more girls now, so I will set aside 10 thousand yuan from my salary. I said I must give this 10 thousand yuan to the love fund every month. Therefore, I can work with the girls to solve their difficulties and honor their parents, because by doing so, I will continue to convey such warmth and love in the enterprise. As a woman, I especially want to say that we must love and protect our home. We are the root of everything. Why is it said that women are the source of the world and mother education is the source of world peace? Our source is clear, and what flows out is clear rivers and clear oceans. Home must be the treasure land where we were born, as long as we give it warmth and sunshine. I always say four words to my sisters, one is politeness, the other is respect, the other is gentleness and the other is obedience. The so-called ceremony means that we must have a close relationship with our husband. This intimacy is to grasp this ceremony and respect it. Don't think that it doesn't matter if you are ripe. Many things have to be solved eventually. If nothing happens, we will get into trouble. We should respect each other. Don't guess a lot of things. Someone also said in front of me, Fang Jie, your husband is so rich, you should pay attention! You should be careful. Every time I go home and see our happy family, I can't remember it. I told many people my famous saying: Believe him when you marry him, that's right. Softness means that our woman's family should be gentle and have a soft heart. The biggest feeling I get when I do beauty is that I am from the heart. We adjusted and treated our sisters' faces, and began to adjust their bodies when they had physical problems. Later, it was discovered that psychological engineering was fundamental. From beauty to fitness to heart-nourishing, heart-nourishing breeds three kinds of women and attractive women, so we have done heart-nourishing cultural festivals many times and communicated with many women. Because I think beauty is easier to do now, and the most important thing is heart. This project is huge. I have appealed in the industry. I said that starting from our beautician, we should have a kind heart to take care of all the sisters who come in and let them relax and obey psychologically. She feels that life is very comfortable. Our beauty industry, every girl, can make thousands of families in Qian Qian happy, can't it? The so-called shun, we women should always say: yes, yes, I know, always promise, say yes. Don't let people say: Look, wait, forget it, I don't know, these negative words will slowly reverse your character and things will not be smooth sailing. So I think we should always compare ourselves with the words "courtesy, respect and obedience". This is the true confession of a 52-year-old woman. I wish every woman in the world a happy day, a happy family and all the best. "