Tang: Being polite is the embodiment of one's self-cultivation as well as a national civilization.

M: Use honorific words to people.

Don: Mm-hmm.

Ma: Speak politely.

Don: Only in this way can we be commensurate with our civilized country.

For example, I saw you.

You saw me.

M: I have to talk to you like this.

Don: What do you mean?

M: Hey, comrade, I'm sorry. Let me ask you something.

Don: Look how polite it is. If you have something to do, just do it.

Let me ask you a question.

Don: Who are you going to ask?

M: I asked this comrade.

Don: Mm-hmm.

Ma: He is tall and burly with heavy eyebrows.

Don: Oh.

M: I heard that he is a crosstalk performer.

Don: Oh, what's this man's name?

His name is Comrade Tang Jiezhong. Is it in your company?

Don: Oh, now, now.

Man: Ah!

Don: Yes, yes, yes.

M: Please come out and I'll meet him. Thank you.

Don: Don't thank me. I am.

Oh, you are Comrade Tang Jiezhong.

Don: Hey.

Oh, I'm sorry.

Don: Huh?

M: I haven't seen you for a long time. Excuse me!

Don: What's the big deal?

M: Did you hear this in your heart?

Don: I sound comfortable. How modest and polite.

Look, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Thank you.

Don: Kind words.

M: That's impolite.

Don: Huh?

M: It shows respect for each other.

Don: Oh.

M: I am modest and polite.

Don: Yes.

M: Hey, everyone has to talk like this.

Don: Oh, oh.

Man: You have to change the way. Don't use these polite words. You don't feel good about this.

Don: What can I say?

M: That's right.

Don: Mm-hmm.

Man: Hey! I said.

Don: What do you call it?

Let me ask you something about a person.

Don: Who are you going to ask?

M: This man.

Don: Mm-hmm.

Ma: A little taller than Wu Dalang, with a head and a tea tray. Yes, I heard that he is a crosstalk performer. What's your name? Everyone's name is Tang Lan.

Don: Hey, why do you call it a nickname?

M: Huh?

Don: Yes, I am. Can I help you?

Man: You are!

Don: Mm-hmm.

M: Don't be ridiculous.

Don: What do you mean? Don't be ridiculous. I'm Tang Jiezhong. what can I do for you?

M: I have something to do. I'm fine. Can I call you?

Don: Say something.

M: Come on, stop it. Neither side wants to. What are you talking about?

Don: Why are you here?

Ma: I said you, don't stare, don't stare. Staring is uglier than epiphysis.

Don: Drink!

M: Look, what does it look like? No, it's not. Please, please, why are you doing this? You see, sometimes angry, sometimes sick, sometimes sick, sometimes cold. Please, if you don't want to tell me, I'll ask someone else. Come on, stupid gentlemen.

The headmaster and the English teacher visited a middle school in France. The headmaster spoke in the auditorium and the English teacher translated.

Principal: "Teachers and students!"

English teacher: "Ladies and gentlemen!"

Principal: "Ladies and gentlemen!"

English teacher-_-! Thought for a moment and said, "Good morning!"

Principal: "Good morning!"

English teacher: ... = = "Sweat.

2. It is said that there is a polar bear, because the snow is too dazzling, he has to wear sunglasses to see things, but he can't find sunglasses, so he crawls around on the ground with his eyes closed and crawls until his hands and feet are dirty. Put on sunglasses and look in the mirror, only to find: Oh, I'm a panda.

3. A polar bear stayed in a daze on the ice. When he was really bored, he began to pluck his hair, one, two, three, and there was no last one left, and then he froze to death.

4. Once upon a time, there was a bird that passed through a cornfield every day, but unfortunately, one day there was a fire in that cornfield, and all the corn turned into popcorn! ! ! After the bird flew by ... it thought it was snowing, so it was very cold.

Xiaoming got a new haircut and came to school the next day. The students all laughed when they saw his new hairstyle: Xiao Ming, your head looks like a kite! Xiao Ming felt very wronged, so he ran outside crying and flew away.

6. The spider fell in love with the butterfly, but the butterfly refused it. Spider asks: Why? This is why! Butterfly said: My mother said that people who fool around on the Internet all day are not good people.

7. On a hot summer day, two bananas were walking on the road. The banana walking in front suddenly felt so hot. He said it was too hot. I want to take off my clothes. As a result, he skinned it. As a result, the banana in the back fell down. Then peeled bananas become dried bananas ~

One day, three explorers finally found the "Valley of Hope". According to legend, as long as you stand on the edge of the valley and shout out what you want, and then jump into the valley, you will get what you want. So the three of them decided to have a try.

The first one was a goat, so he shouted "Woman! Woman! " The next jump is really full of beautiful women waiting for him.

The second is a bookworm, shouting "Book Book Book Book Book Book!" Then, jump into the valley and get books full of pits and valleys.

The third kind is an indecisive person, who can't decide what he likes after thinking about it. After an hour, he finally made up his mind that money is the most useful thing, so he went to the valley. He accidentally kicked a stone and scolded, "Shit!" Unexpectedly, an unstable center of gravity fell into the valley.

9. What about Xiaoming? He will have an exam tomorrow, but he is watching TV in the evening.

Xiao Ming's mother asked anxiously: Have you finished all the books? There will be an exam tomorrow.

Xiao Ming replied brightly: Mom, I finished reading it.

Xiao Ming's mother praised Xiao Ming happily: Good boy, then you must do well in the exam tomorrow.

Xiao Ming cried and said, Mom, I mean,' Mom, I think it's over'.

10. The panda loves the deer deeply, but it is rejected when expressing its love. Panda roar ~ why? What's all this for? The deer said timidly, my mother said that those who wear sunglasses are all bad teenagers.

1 1. One day, Xiao Ming was walking on the road. I suddenly feel sore when I walk! Why is this happening? Because Xiaoming stepped on a lemon!

12. Which Chinese character is the coolest? Thong (cool)

The towel said to the coin, son. If you put on a doctor's hat, you will be worth a hundred times.

The "ruler" said to "do": Sister, the results have come out. You are pregnant with twins.

The minister said to the giant: the same area as you. I have three rooms and two halls.

13. One day, a university teacher asked a student that there were ten birds in the tree and one was shot dead. How much is left?

The student asked: Is it silent pistol? No, how loud was the shot? 80- 100 decibel. Is it illegal to shoot birds in this city? No offense. Are you sure that bird was really killed? Of course. At this time, the teacher was impatient: "Will you just tell me how many birds are left?" Are there some deaf birds in the tree? No. Have you ever been caged and hung from a tree? No. Are there any other trees nearby? Are there any other birds in the tree? No, if a bird is pregnant, is it a bird in its belly? Not exactly. Is there a flower in the bird photographer's eye? There are no flowers, only ten. The teacher was sweating all over, and the bell rang, but the students continued to ask: Are there any stupid birds that are not afraid of death? Fear of death. Would you kill two with one shot? No, the student said confidently, if your answer is not a lie, "if the bird that was killed hangs on the tree and doesn't fall, there is only one left." If it falls, there will be none left. " . The teacher immediately foaming at the mouth fell to the ground! 1, sensitive and eager to learn, not ashamed to ask questions-Confucius

2, the industry is diligent, barren land; What is done in thinking is destroyed in following-Han Yu

3, learning without thinking is useless, thinking without learning is dangerous-Confucius

4. Knowing is not as good as being good, and being good is not as good as being happy-Confucius.

5, a threesome, there must be my teacher. Choose the good and follow it, and change the bad-Confucius.

6, Xing Yu Shi, Li Yu Li, Cheng Yu Le-Confucius

7. Don't do to others what you don't want them to do to you-Confucius

8, reading thousands of books, writing like a god-Du Fu

9. There are three kinds of reading, namely, heart, eyes and mouth-Zhu.

10, the foundation is to establish knowledge first, and the establishment of knowledge is based on reading-Ouyang Xiu

1 1. Read thousands of books and take Wan Li Road-Liu Yi.

12, black hair does not know to learn early, white hair regrets to learn late-Yan Zhenqing

13, the book is as affectionate as ever, and every blind date is gloomy and happy-Yu Qian

14, books or medicine, good reading can cure fools-Liu Xiang

15, if the young don't work hard, the old will be sad-"Han Yuefu". Changge Xing/The Long Ballad

16, don't be idle, grow old together and be heartbroken-Yue Fei

17. Try to know all the people in the world and make up your mind to read all the books in the world-Su Shi

18, birds want to fly first, people want to be advanced-Li Kuchan.

19, determined to be a true character, we must do our best to study-Ruan Yuan.

20. Indifference is unclear, and quietness is not far away-Zhuge Liang.

2 1, don't do it because of small evils, don't do it because of small goodness-Chen Shou's "History of the Three Kingdoms"

22. Be familiar with 300 Tang poems, and you can recite them even if you can't write them-Sun Zhu's Preface to 300 Tang Poems.

23, the book is used, you hate it less, and you don't know how difficult it is until you have been there-Lu You.

24, ask the canal is so clear, because there is a source of flowing water-Zhu.

25. I can never get tired of reading old books, and I won't know who I am until I read them carefully-Su Shi.