Current location - Quotes Website - Famous sayings - Interpersonal communication, learn to praise, design situations,
Interpersonal communication, learn to praise, design situations,

Praising others is like lighting up other people's lives with a torch, and it also illuminates your own heart. Praising others not only helps to develop friendship between each other, but also eliminates resentment between people and makes people get along more harmoniously and harmoniously.

When you praise others, you are sometimes praising yourself.

There is a speech contest with the theme of "life". After a high-level paraplegic young man finished speaking, a middle-aged man sitting next to Hui took a deep breath, turned to Hui excitedly and praised repeatedly: "It's amazing, it's amazing, this is a speech, this is life." !" In fact, Hui and he didn't know each other, and he didn't know that Hui would be the next speaker. indeed. The young man's speech style was simple and unpretentious, and touched people's hearts with his true feelings; but Hui was thinking about his speech. Moreover, he could be regarded as Hui's "rival". Although he felt that his speech was successful, he was not very involved. Just look at it from a bystander's point of view. The middle-aged man's sincere and emotional praise immediately made Hui feel ashamed. When Hui stepped onto the podium, his first sentence was to praise the young man who had just left in the wheelchair, or the "opponent". During Hui's speech, Hui felt that the audience was very quiet, and the speech had the expected effect. Just as Hui finished his speech and walked to his seat, Hui saw the middle-aged man applauding him vigorously and raising his hands above his head twice.

We may not praise others easily, but if we can’t help praising those who are like-minded, those who are worthy of our admiration, or those whom we meet without knowing each other, then we You will also feel extremely happy at the same time. Because praise is not flattery and flattery, and praising others is not just what others say.

Everyone likes compliments and compliments from others. However, learning to praise does not mean that you need to learn to flatter.

There is such a story. In ancient times, there were two people, one named Zhu Ziyuan and the other Tang Ling. They were going to the capital to serve as officials. Before leaving, they went to their teacher's home to say goodbye. The teacher told them: "It is impossible to take the right path in the current situation. When you go to the capital to be an official, you should be respectful to others. This is called giving a high hat. If you do this, you will not offend anyone, and it will be easier to get anything done." Tang Ling said with admiration: "What the teacher said is really good. How many people like the teacher don't like high hats today?" The teacher was very happy after hearing this. On the way back, Tang Ling said to Ziyuan, "Look! The top hat gave away another one."

In fact, the most important thing about praise is that it should be sincere and natural. Praise should not be a courtesy, nor should it be a false shot. Appropriate praise can sometimes affect others' lives. The power of praise and the spark of encouragement can even make miraculous changes in people's lives.

There was a boss who organized tours for his employees every year, but one year he suddenly stopped. The reason was that he spent a lot of money every year, but no employee ever said to him: "Thank you, boss." "A mother angrily threw straw on the table and said, "I have been cooking for my family all my life, but there is no word of praise or gratitude from the whole family. Isn't this the same as giving you straw?" There is an advertisement. Famous saying: "Seventy percent of creativity is wiped out by cold words." Through these examples, we can see that praise is actually needed in many places in daily life, which also reflects the importance of praise.

A cowherd student needs praise to become a chemist; a shy student needs praise to become a popular scholar; a child's future achievements need praise from his parents... Without praise in life, there will be a lack of progress. motivation.

There is a saying in Buddhism: If the Buddha Dharma is to flourish, the monks must praise the monks. Master Hsing Yun said: Praise is like sunshine, which can spread warmth in all directions; the language of praise is like perfume, a small drop can spread all around. Praise should be touching. Praising others is a kind of practice of appreciating talents. Praising others is a kind of self-motivation. Praise is the most beautiful language in the world and the best lubricant among people. The most economical gift in the world is praise. Praise and appreciate others more, and society will naturally be peaceful. If you can praise people with an open heart, your life will be more beautiful and your life will be happier.

While compliments are a good thing, they are never easy. If you fail to assess the situation and master certain complimenting skills when praising others, even if you are sincere, a good thing will turn into a bad thing. Therefore, we must think twice before speaking. This requires us to do the following five points:

1. We must learn to vary from person to person

People's quality is different, and their age is different. It varies from person to person. Highlight individuality and targeted praises can be received better than general praises. effect. Although it is said that "a good man never mentions his bravery in the past," for some elderly people, they definitely don't want to think so, because they always hope that others will always remember their achievements and heroic deeds "in the past", and when talking to them, they can praise them more. A past that you are proud of; for young people, you may want to praise his creative talents and pioneering spirit in a slightly exaggerated tone, and cite a few examples to prove that he does have a bright future; for those who are doing business, you can praise him for his flexible mind and his ability to make money. Tao; for a high-status cadre, you can praise him for serving the country and the people, being honest and upright; for an intellectual, you can praise him for being knowledgeable, quiet and indifferent... Of course, all this must be based on facts, and must not be empty boasts, let alone flattery.

2. Be sincere

Almost everyone likes to hear compliments, but not all compliments can make the other person happy. The only things that can arouse the other person's goodwill are those compliments that are based on facts and come from the heart. On the contrary, if you praise others without any basis and false feelings, the other party will not only feel confused, but also think that you are glib, treacherous and hypocritical. For example, when you see an unattractive young lady, but you insist on saying to her: "You are so beautiful." The other party will immediately think that what you said is hypocritical and goes against their will. But if you focus on her clothes, conversation, and behavior, find her outstanding features in these aspects and sincerely praise her, she will definitely accept it happily. Sincere praise will not only make the person being praised feel psychologically happy, but also enable you to often discover the advantages of others and make you have an optimistic and appreciative attitude towards life.

3. Your words should be specific and detailed

It is not common for a person to have outstanding achievements. Therefore, you should analyze specific things in interactions, be good at discovering even the smallest strengths of others, and praise them without losing any opportunity. Use specific and detailed compliments to show that you know the other person very well and value their strengths and achievements very much. Let the other person feel that you are sincere, cordial and trustworthy, so that the distance between you will become closer and closer. If you just praise the other party in a vague way and say some vague or even exaggerated words such as "You are doing a great job" or "You are an excellent leader", it will arouse the other party's suspicion and even cause unnecessary misunderstandings. and crisis of confidence.

4. Praising others should be done in moderation

Effective compliments should be played according to circumstances and should be done in moderation. It should be truly "drinking good wine until you are slightly drunk, and seeing beautiful flowers when they are half-bloomed."

When someone plans to do something meaningful, the praise at the beginning can encourage him to make up his mind to achieve the result, the praise in the middle is helpful for the other person to make persistent efforts, and the praise at the end can confirm the achievement and point out further steps. The direction of efforts, so as to achieve the effect of "praising one and motivating a group".

5. Praise others in a timely manner

As the saying goes: "Adversity brings true love." We do not want to praise those who have already achieved success, but to praise those who have a sense of inferiority because they are buried or are in adversity. It is usually difficult for them to hear a word of praise. Once they are sincerely praised in public, they may cheer up and make great achievements. Therefore, the most effective compliment is not "the icing on the cake" but "the timely help".

Of course, there are many ways to express praise. Sometimes, an approving look, a complimenting gesture, and a friendly smile can have unexpected effects.

After doing these five points, you can easily praise others.

A mother who often praises her children will create a happy family; a teacher who often praises students can make a class united and friendly every day; a leader who often praises his subordinates can make his organization better. Manage into a united and progressive collective. Seeing this, we may sincerely accept and learn to sincerely and well-intentioned compliments from others.

Do you have a good interpersonal relationship? Compliments behind your back will make your relationships feel better.

When the person you want to get close to is present, you can praise and say in front of the person: "You are great! You are amazing." However, since this is what everyone praises, the effect is not ideal. . Words of praise are more effective than saying them behind the other person's back.

For example, if you admire Mr. A's work performance very much, you can say when you meet his colleagues, "Mr. A works really hard!" This kind of comment will come true. In another way, it was conveyed back to Mr. A’s ears, “So-and-so is full of praise for your work performance!” Which is more pleasant, hearing the same thing directly or being informed by others? Usually, compliments in person can only be regarded as social rhetoric. However, there is no need for others to say flattery behind your back. Therefore, you will feel very happy when you receive compliments from others. Moreover, compliments heard indirectly mean that others also know that they have been praised. This point alone can make people feel that their abilities have been highly praised, and it is enough to show that the person who praises them truly admires them.

Almost everyone has vanity. Therefore, in the company, if you can express to the other party's boss that you praise his subordinates, the effect will be better. If one day, your boss says something to you that others praise you for. How happy you will be! Sometimes, if you bring up the strengths of your subordinates that your boss has not noticed, they will definitely be grateful to you. Of course, the content of the praise should not be words such as "He is very serious about his work!" or "Your subordinates are so good!" You should try to come up with specific content so that you can truly achieve the effect of praise.

Concrete praise is very important. This will not only leave a deep impression on the boss, but will also be passed on to the other person himself. If you just say some flattering words, the other party's boss will not take it seriously, let alone further spread it to the other party's ears. This requires us to have the necessary observation skills. Without the ability to discern the other person's strengths, your compliments will be limited to social rhetoric. On the other hand, as long as you have the power of observation, your interpersonal relationships will continue to expand.

We can usually find a person’s shortcomings easily.

On the contrary, if you are good at discovering the advantages of others, and the praises you give will be persuasive, and you can know that as long as the other person is engaged in those tasks, they can use their abilities more effectively. Sometimes, these advantages are not even noticed by him himself, but can they be unhappy that you can discover and praise them? By using this method to understand each other, your interpersonal relationships will definitely become more active.