His family is well-off, when he was young, he was maverick, unconventional and witty, wearing a velvet dress and holding a sunflower lily in his hand. This is his aesthetic declaration.
Perhaps secular love is boring in Wilde's eyes, or perhaps morality is no longer a bondage in the eyes of this talented writer. The appearance of Alfred Douglas is the driving force that drives Wilde to the abyss and homosexuality. He dragged Wilde into the war between him and his tyrannical father, and finally put Wilde in prison on charges of homosexuality.
When Wilde reviewed the reasons for his imprisonment and examined his life, he wrote: "When I was in prison, I had only a heart of stone and had to pursue pleasure. Now my heart is completely broken, now my heart is full of sympathy, and now I know that sympathy is the greatest and most beautiful thing in the world. "
Although the broken heart has been sublimated, time cannot escape the ravages of disease. Three years after his release from prison, Wilde died in a small hotel in Paris, and his ups and downs came to an end.
His aestheticism style has long been destroyed in prison, but the fairy tales he left to the world before he went to prison perfectly integrated aestheticism with his insight into the world. Whether it is the love of the happy prince, the obsession of the crying nightingale with love, or the young king's persistence in simplicity after abandoning prosperity, it is like the warm sunshine in winter, which fills his heart with strength.
As Oscar Wilde said, "We all live in the gutter, but some people still look up at the stars." Falling into the sewer, heartbreak is inevitable and painful, but heartbreak can also be reborn. Life is not smooth sailing, even if it is stormy and thunderous, would you like to be the one who looks up at the stars? In the darkest moment of life, re-recognize yourself.
Wilde said so.
How to love yourself?
Like the happy prince's previous life, enjoy yourself in a carefree palace and live in your own world until you die? Like a young king, looking for rare and precious things everywhere with strange enthusiasm for beauty? Or like a selfish giant, scare away the children playing, build a high wall around his garden and enjoy the beautiful scenery of the garden alone?
Like them, do they love themselves by pursuing the ecstasy of inner sensory experience and satisfying their extremely luxurious material needs?
Only by careful tasting can we find the emptiness and find that aestheticism is not based on pain and loneliness.
When the happy prince stands on a high place and sees all the pains in the world, he gives diamonds and gold coins embedded in his body to the suffering people, and his inner wealth makes happiness no longer a low-level happiness; When the young king saw in his dream that his luxurious life was bought with the hard work and even life of many poor people, he put on the most frugal yellow robe and was even crowned by God. When the giant put down his bad feelings and sincerely shared them with the children, late spring once again put on beautiful costumes for the garden.
In fact, loving yourself is to find your own value. Inner beauty is far better than outer beauty, but do you think it is enough to pursue inner beauty? Reality will slap you.
Wilde's fairy tales tell you that people in the world often only look at your appearance, and few people enter your heart. More often, your path is full of thorns, and it is not even accepted by the world. The sculpture of the Happy Prince became ugly because of the lack of gold pieces and diamonds, and was rejected and abandoned by the world. Even the poor hated the young king, and the numb people even shouted the complaint that "it is bitter to work for a harsh master, but it is even harder for you to work for him without a master".
In real life, there is no such person. Cong Fei, the ambassador of love, has helped hundreds of poor children, but those he helped are still asking for money when he is dying. There was also a crazy nanny arson case, which resulted in the death of a kind mother and her three children. How can this not be the biggest blasphemy against goodness?
The tragedy of Wilde's fairy tales lies in his portrayal of the truth of the world. There is no peace and prosperity, only a strong heart.
The reality is cold, and people warm each other on the way to find love.
In Grimm's fairy tales, we see the prince and Cinderella living happily together. We think this is love.
However, in Wilde's fairy tales, we see the love that we can't get. The pedantic student in The Nightingale and the Rose thinks that if he sends a red rose to his admirer in the cold winter, he will get love. The little dwarf in spanish princess thinks that the princess is happy for his performance and sends him beautiful flowers, which is love; The fisherman in The Fisherman and His Soul indulged in the singing of the mermaid he salvaged and cut off his soul to follow her. He thinks this is love.
Is this love? How can such love be so heartbreaking and sad?
We can't help thinking about what love is.
Scott parker told us in "The Road Few People Walk" that "love is a kind of self-improvement will to promote the mental maturity of self and others."
Just like the Happy Prince and the Swallow, the Swallow was moved by the contribution of the Happy Prince and was the messenger of his love. The happy prince was also heartbroken and froze to death for the swallow who accompanied him to help the poor but could not bear to leave. Therefore, love is a mutual recognition of values and a dedication of souls.
Not only love, but friendship.
As Voltaire said, "Friendship is the combination of souls, and this combination can be divorced. This is a tacit agreement between two sensitive and honest people. "
For friendship, we should first learn to give, and don't live like a "great rocket", put our position too high, treat ourselves as dusty gold, but don't know that we are just a stone. Arrogant people want everyone to embrace themselves and be doomed to loneliness, and no one wants to be their partner.
Of course, don't be a "good person", just pay, but I don't know if the other person is worth it. Just like little Hans in A Faithful Friend, there is a friend who is a miller with noble feelings. The miller always asks little Hans to send him flowers and repair his house under the banner of "noble and selfless", but he never gives anything back to poor and hungry little Hans. He also called it "when people are in trouble, we should not bother him and should not visit him;" And don't invite him to our house. He will be jealous when he sees our warm fire and rich dinner. Jealousy destroys human nature. I don't want to destroy Hans' nature. "Poor little Hans was proud of such a friend and eventually drowned because he helped such a friend, while the miller's friend only thought that the death of little Hans was a great loss to him.
This ridiculous thing often happens in reality, and there are always some people whose kindness is used as a gun by others. You can't influence other people's values any more than you can convince those who are really asleep.
When you have a clear understanding of your own value and a firm choice in your heart, it is even more impossible to satisfy everyone. Therefore, it is enough to have a bosom friend in life, accompanied by true love and walking with the soul.