Why do people have no friends when they reach middle age? You need to understand these 3 points, this is life.
01 Realize that most relationships are relationships of interest
When we are young and ignorant, we don’t have to bear the pressure of life. We only need to study and make friends based on interests and like-minded interests. People are often better at talking about everything, even about eating and living at home. However, after experiencing the ups and downs of people in society and the ups and downs of the world, we discovered that the famous saying of this ancestor is very correct: "Everyone in the world is prosperous and prosperous, and everyone in the world is prosperous." There are distant relatives in the mountains."
There are no eternal friends in the world, only eternal interests; the various connections accumulated in the early stage will be used when it comes time to use them. If you do not have the strength yourself and cannot bring benefits or benefits to others, you will Gradually become indifferent and slowly become a familiar stranger. We have hundreds of people in our address book, but not many who can be considered true friends.
02 Don’t want to embarrass yourself
Middle-aged friends have fewer friends because they don’t want to make themselves unhappy and don’t want to embarrass themselves. Regarding friendship, Cai Kangyong once had this interpretation: "Never put friendship at an incredible level. Some friends are people who bring good things to themselves at a certain stage. While enjoying each other, don't restrict each other." Among Friends Only when we get along with each other and make each other "comfortable" can we go further. There is no dispute over interests, let alone forcing each other, only mutual trust and longing. When people reach middle age, in addition to doing business, they no longer want to participate in big drinking parties. People are doing some meaningless socializing. As everyone knows, the essence of interpersonal relationships is equal exchange, and you will not be able to do it just because you know someone. Bring benefit to you.
Although you don’t want to do unnecessary socializing, you will be more grateful. Those who have helped you, those who have given you a hand, when they need help, you will be willing to Treat each other sincerely. If you have the ability to repay your kindness to your friends, if you don't have the ability to give me a little effort, as long as you are sincere, true friends will understand you. A friend becomes separated not because of physical distance, but because of psychological distance. There is only one internal reason for friends to break up, and that is that your status has changed, your values ??are not on the same level, and your ideas are not on the same track. No matter how hard you try, the friendship will eventually be destroyed.
03 Sense of distance
In boyhood and adolescence, people have many friends, but ten or twenty years later, everyone’s growth situation is different, and the results are also very different. difference. Some people have become rich from no money, some have become rich from no money, some have been divorced, some have been promoted, and some have remained the same. Because our experiences are different, our moods when we are together are also different. We slowly find that we are not the same as before. The original balanced relationship is destroyed. The friendship goes against the wind all the way. Even if the boat does not capsize, there is no intention to take the boat. .
Summary: We have fewer and fewer friends in middle age. The main reason is that our mood has changed a lot. Secondly, the external environment has become more and more unfamiliar to us. It has changed too much. If there are too many, we don’t want to change, and naturally we will have fewer and fewer friends.