"His problem is the person who wants to do subtraction."
"In other words, you must learn a word called passivity."
"What is a blunt force? You shouldn't be so sensitive to many things. "
He Laoshi's words are not only about Jerry Yan, but also point out the common fault of many young people: high sensitivity.
I don't know when it started. The Internet age seems to make each of us particularly sensitive to the perception of things.
Sensitivity is too high, and it is especially important to cultivate insensitive people.
What is blunt force?
"Blunt feeling" can be literally translated as "blunt force", which comes from a book called "Blunt feeling" by Japanese writer Junichi Watanabe. According to the author's own explanation, passivity is to face the setbacks and pains in life calmly and move forward firmly towards the goal.
My personal understanding is that "passivity" refers to "the ability to perceive things dully", with the emphasis on "dullness".
In other words, when we perceive things, we should not pay too much attention to and care about some unimportant details of things.
The pace of life is fast, and everyone's energy is limited. If you spend too much time to detect, doubt and care about unnecessary information, your mental internal friction will be great and really meaningless.
If you think too much, think too much. If someone casually says a word, a tone, a look and a punctuation mark, you have to think about it for a long time in your mind. "Why did he do this?" "Did I do something wrong?" ..... Such excessive capture and thinking will consume a person's spirit.
And sometimes, the information perceived by highly sensitive people may not be objective and true. Just like holding a magnifying glass in your hand, you have to look at everything through the magnifying glass and enlarge the details.
Once a small matter is magnified, the truth may be distorted, but we can't see its true face clearly.
I participated in a video interview yesterday.
Because this is my first job interview, I know little about many procedures, etiquette or precautions. So I searched a lot of interview experience online a few days in advance. Until ten minutes before the interview, I was still reviewing my next points in my mind over and over again.
Because it was the first interview, hr just got to know the general situation, so it ended in a hurry.
Hanging up the video, I looked at the time, 1 1.5438+05.
This interview only took 15 minutes, and I was a little depressed at first, because many people didn't say that the normal interview time was about 30 -60 minutes.
I recalled hr's eyes and reaction at the other end of the screen during the interview, and my brow wrinkled. I can even detect a trace of impatience from her occasional expression …
I think my job may be ruined.
Just 40 minutes after the interview, WeChat rang, and hr sent me the WeChat business card of the retest officer, asking me to prepare for the retest …
You see, I'm too sensitive.
I kept a lot of unimportant details in my heart, and gave a wrong definition and made a wrong judgment.
I think I need to let go of myself and make myself "confused" and "relaxed", but I will be happier.
Of course, sensitivity has its own advantages, and so does the sense of shock. In essence, there is no distinction between positive and negative meanings, and there is no distinction between high and low.
Just learn to be sensitive when it is sensitive, and learn to be uncomfortable when it is uncomfortable.
For example, facing the criticism of leaders in the workplace, facing the public censure of teachers in the student career, ordering you to feel embarrassed and ashamed in public, lamenting the reticence of father and mother in the family, casual jokes between friends and social "etiquette" in the circle of friends. ...
In the face of these scenes, your sensitivity will be put away.
You don't need to care too much. You care, so what?
Things have happened, and your concern for your troubles will not change the outcome of things. Since you can't change it, why not let it go?
Let's be straightforward, slow and confused.
Slowly, you will be more and more happy, more and more relaxed, and more and more feel how beautiful the world is and how lovely life is.
And how "unnecessary" you were.
Passivity is an ability and a flexible force.
I hope we can all perceive the world flexibly.
Finally, I would like to borrow a sentence from Junichi Watanabe for you and me:
"Be insensitive to what is in front of you, don't take everything to heart."