Release time: 20 18- 1
This book is divided into four parts to introduce the rise and origin of Stoicism, psychological skills, advice to modern life, and the reasons and present situation of its decline. The level is relatively clear, step by step, which gives us some suggestions on practicing Stoicism in our current life, solves our doubts in our current life, and tells us the benefits of practicing Stoicism with our own personal experience.
Generally speaking, the structure of this book is clear, but some of its contents used to be very long and boring to read. However, the practical methods put forward by Stoicism are still very useful, such as negative imagination, dichotomy, fatalism, self-discomfort, etc., which are very helpful for us to think in life. Regarding the author's suggestion, it is very useful for us to deal with money, reputation, environment, social relations and interpersonal relations in real life.
Key points: Suggestions on the practice of asceticism
1. negative imagination 2. Control trigonometry iii. Fatalism 4. Self-seeking discomfort
An ascetic suggestion
1. Values about money, reputation and social relations
2. Attitude towards interpersonal relationships, insults, sadness and anger in life.
Action plan 1. When you encounter sadness and anger in your life, you should first calm yourself down, think about the bad aspects and calm your state.
When you are insulted by others, try to fight back with humor.
3. Irregular negative imagination and self-discomfort to satisfy temporary gratitude.
4. Practice control trio: ignore those things that can't be directly controlled, pay attention to the internalization of those things that can be partially controlled, and pay attention to those things that can be controlled.
Excerpt:
Quote p 10, because the goals may conflict with each other; When conflicts arise, we need to decide which goals should be given priority. So she will help us sort out these goals and sort them out. The goal at the top of this ranking is a lofty goal in our life. This should be a goal that we are not willing to sacrifice for other goals. After helping us choose this goal, the life philosophy tutor will help us design strategies to achieve this goal.
It is very important to feel the priority of goals and things, especially in work and life. We need to set priorities and accomplish them step by step in order to finish our work more efficiently and better.
On the contrary, the Stoics believe that there is nothing wrong with enjoying the benefits that life can provide, as long as we are careful in the way we enjoy it. Especially when the objective environment changes, we must be prepared to give up these interests without regret.
Today, I will encounter interference, ingratitude, arrogance, disloyalty, malice and selfishness-all these are caused by the ignorance of the offender, who doesn't know what is good and what is evil. "
In fact, this is a school belief, just like religious belief. Fortunately, its concept gives people a correct and feasible truth that we can accept now.
132 In interpersonal relationships, we also experience pleasure adaptation. We met the dream Prince Charming or Snow White, and after an exciting period of love, we married this person. At first, we were in a happy marriage, but soon, we found ourselves eyeing the shortcomings of our spouse, and soon, we would fantasize about starting a new relationship with a new person.
Really, this seems to be the true portrayal of most people. There is a saying that "marriage is the grave of love", which means that we always like the new and hate the old, so there are so many emotional problems to be solved.
134- The easiest way to get happiness is to learn how to want what we already have.
They suggest that we take time to imagine that we have lost what we cherish.
When the Stoics suggested that we should spend every day as if it were the last, their goal was not to change our activities, but to change our mentality when we carried out these activities. In particular, they don't want us to stop thinking about the future and plan for tomorrow; They actually want us to remember to cherish today when thinking and planning tomorrow.
However, due to the adaptation to enjoyment, we find that once we live our dream life, we will take it for granted. We don't use days to enjoy good luck, but to form and pursue new and bigger dreams. Therefore, we will never be satisfied with our life. Negative imagination can help us avoid this fate.
Indeed, our desires always push us forward. After we get what we once dreamed of, whether it is work or lover, we will ignore or even dislike it, which will lead to many tragedies in life and make us unhappy. However, there are two sides to the truth. On the one hand, it brings us pain, on the other hand, it makes us move in a farther direction.
148 By consciously imagining losing what we have, we can regain the value of these things; With this regained treasure, we can revitalize the ability to be happy.
156 as long as you change your outlook on life, you can easily embrace satisfaction in your arms, but you insist on living in self-induced dissatisfaction. This is the real stupidity.
the second part
No matter what intrudes into our destiny, we must learn to meet it; And convince ourselves that no matter what happens to us, it is for our own good. Indeed, according to Kyle, an excellent person should satisfy "all the experiences that destiny's loom weaves for him".
The third part, chapter 14
If our goal is to please others, then we cannot please ourselves freely. ..... we will make ourselves slaves.
-epiktetos
Chapter 16 the mind makes us rich: in the wildest wilderness, the mind is exiled with us; After finding everything needed to maintain the body, it enjoyed its spiritual products.
Seneca
First of all, we should become conscious: when dealing with daily affairs, we should observe ourselves and regularly reflect on how we deal with various events that happen every day.
Second, we should use the ability of rational thinking to overcome negative emotions.
Third, when you have money, you should enjoy wealth and not pursue it; It is cynics who advocate abstinence and penance, not stoics.
Fourth, we are social animals; If we try to cut off contact with others, we will become very bad.
Fifth, other people will inevitably annoy us, so if we keep in touch with them, they will always disturb our peace-if we allow them to do so.
Sixthly, Stoic philosophers pointed out two main causes of human unhappiness-that is, our insatiable greed and our tendency to worry about things beyond our control-and they also developed some skills to help us eliminate these sources of unhappiness from our lives.
Seventh, in order to conquer our insatiable greed, Stoic philosophers advise us to imagine negatively.
Eighth, in order to restrain our tendency to worry about things beyond our control, Stoic philosophers suggest that we adopt a method of giving priority to all kinds of things in life, that is, divide these things into things that we can't completely control, things that we can completely control and things that we can't completely control.
Ninth, when we spend time dealing with things that we can control but can't completely control, we should pay attention to internalizing our goals.
Tenth, we should adopt a fatalistic attitude towards the outside world: we should realize that what happened to us in the past and what happened to us now are beyond our control, so it is foolish to worry about these things.
I feel that this is the author's suggestion that we use Stoicism to maintain peace. I hope that through this suggestion, in this complicated world, we can get peace and keep our inner peace.
part four
Negative imagination is as important to daily life as salt is to cooking. Although a chef needs the least time, energy and talent to add salt to food, the taste of all salted food will be improved. Almost by the same token, although practicing negative imagination takes the least time, energy and talent, people who practice negative imagination will find that their ability to enjoy life has been greatly improved. After practicing negative imagination, you will find that the life you warmly embrace is the life you complained about not long ago.
I feel that salt and food are the simplest things, simple as everyone knows, but they are the key to delicious food. Without it, no matter how delicious the rest is, it is also a failure. This is the same as negative imagination in practicing Stoicism. The simplest is the most important.
Because a self-disciplined person has the ability to decide what to do with his life. People who lack self-discipline will embark on a life path that has been decided by others or other things. Therefore, they are likely to waste their lives.
I have always known how terrible a self-disciplined person is. Just like Eddie Peng Yuyan Swift, a self-disciplined person is terrible, so he will become a national male god. Because self-discipline makes us better and gains a lot of unexpected things. Since we can't change the past and predict the future, we have to grasp the present and let ourselves dominate our lives.