Being your friend for so long, you have always cared about me, but I often give you trouble. I really don't know how to repay you.

so.

be a cow and a horse in the next life.

I will definitely pull up the grass for you to eat.

2. I miss you very much, but I'm embarrassed to call you. I'm afraid that you are busy, that you will ignore me, that you think I'm harassing me, and I really want to contact you, but … the phone bill is really expensive. Please call me! -Old Guerrilla 3. If you are a meteor, I will chase you. If you are a satellite, I will wait for you. If you are a star, I will fall in love with you. Unfortunately.

You are an orangutan ~ I can only see you in the zoo! ! Alas.

what a pity! ! 4. Now I am in a mess.

I don't know what I'm thinking.

my mind is bored to death.

I really don't know what to do? .

can you tell me?

I really don't know whether to eat dry noodles or Ah Q bucket noodles! -Old Guerrilla 5. Thank you for being with me when I was most frustrated and helping me when I needed help most. I just want to tell you: "Nothing good has happened since I met you! You are a loser! "-Old Guerrilla 6. I'm sorry to text you so late ~ ~ If it bothers you ~ ~ I'm here to say ~ ~ You deserve it ~ ~ Who told you to go to bed earlier than me? ~ ~ Hehe! ! 7. Meeting you ~ was my heart's desire to fall in love with you ~ It was my happy choice to have you ~ It was my most precious wealth ~ Stepping on the red carpet ~ It was my eternal motivation to love forever ~ It was your pity that I passed it on to the wrong person. 8. Because of you, I believe that maybe all this is predestined, pulling us together. Now, I really want to say … what evil I did in my last life! 9. Starting from tomorrow, the city has decided to eliminate all the mentally retarded young people who are ugly and detrimental to the city appearance! Pack your things quickly, go out and take shelter, and don't tell anyone that I informed you, remember! You're welcome. 1. God saw that you were thirsty and created water. God saw that you were hungry and created rice. God saw that you had no lovely friends and created me; However, he also saw that there were no idiots in this world and created you by the way. 11. If it is stipulated that a person can only be kind to one person in his life, I would rather that person is you.

I have no regrets until I die! But there is no rule ... then forget it! Jytj12. It's a pleasure to miss you! It's a pleasure to meet you! Loving you is what I will always do! Keeping you in mind is what I have been doing! But lying to you, it just happened! Ha ha! Jf13. The phone rang, which means I'm thinking of you! Two sounds means I like you! Three sounds means I love you! Jyhf When the seventh sound rings … Shit, I really need to talk to you, so don't answer the phone! 14. According to statistics, it is over 99. 9% people who look like pig heads use their thumbs to press buttons to read text messages! Hey, hey, don't change hands, it's too late.

pig head! Ha ha ha 15. I wrote your name in the sky, but it was blown away by the wind; I wrote your name on the beach, but it was washed away by the sea; I wrote your name in every corner … fuck, I was taken away by the police! 16. If it's a mistake to look good … I've made a big mistake. If loveliness is a crime … I've committed a heinous crime. It's hard to be a man! ... you will be fine ~ yes, there is no sin ... I really envy you. 17. When white clouds float by, it is the trace of my missing you; When the sun shines, that's how I miss you. When the rain falls, that's proof that I miss you. When it thunders and thunders, that's when I pray to heaven that you are struck. .

ha-ha-18. If I burn incense for one year, I can meet you, incense for three years can get to know you, and incense for ten years can cherish you, for the happiness of my next life, I will.

convert to Christianity. 2. Common humorous sentences

1. Don't be nervous, I'm not a good person ...

2. Chop the wire with a kitchen knife, and there are sparks and lightning all the way.

3. I have been suffering from insomnia recently and wake up every 16 hours.

4. Everyone says I'm ugly, but in fact I'm just plain beautiful.

5. I never bully the weak ~ ~ ~ I didn't know he was weaker than me before I bullied him …

6. A gentleman is nothing more than a patient wolf.

7. I'm not RMB, so how can everyone like me? !

8. why don't you find a quiet place and count the brain cells by yourself?

9. I am relieved to know that you are not doing well.

1. Life is only three days, and people who live in yesterday are confused; Those who live in tomorrow wait; People who live today are the most practical.

11. The road to success is always under construction.

12. I sincerely want to make money into my hobby.

13. The boy I once loved had the most handsome back in the world.

14. A woman without talent is virtue. I must be too wicked.

15. The sign of immature men is that they can make heroic sacrifices for their ideals, while the sign of mature men can live lowly for their ideals.

16. There are always a few mistakes in the long road of life.

17. I want the whole world to know that I keep a low profile.

18. I want to grow old with you if I am not careful.

19. A real warrior dares to face his face without makeup.

2. Wearing cheap goods and Wenzhou shoes, the whole body does not exceed that of 2 yuan. Only the bag in hand is considered as a high-grade leather bag, because its English name is "Gaojipibao".

21. Besides teeth, there is love.

22. Don't say love to others easily, don't stubbornly open other people's hearts and leave with a joke.

23. Most people want to change the world, but few people want to change themselves. 3. Urgency, a famous saying about humor. Praise

● Lu Xun: It is naturally a good tactic to use jokes to deal with the enemy, but it must be fatal to the opponent where it touches, otherwise, the joke will be just a simple joke. ● Lin Yutang: I doubt whether the world has ever experienced the importance of humor, or the possibility of humor to change our entire cultural life-humor is politically, politically. Its position in life. Its function is not so much material as chemical. It has changed the fundamental organization of our thoughts and experiences. We must acknowledge its importance in national life. ● Qian Zhongshu: A truly humorous person has a unique understanding, smiles happily alone, and takes a breath for a boring life. ● Wang Meng: Good humor not only makes you laugh, but also makes you cry. If you cry too much, your tears will drop in price, so you will be happy when you have exhausted your tears. You can still see the author's solemn and sincere soul when you are laughing. Perhaps the pain of humor is not weaker than the pain of pain. ● Qian Renkang: Humor is the light of all wisdom, shining among the spirituality of ancient and modern philosophers. Anyone who has a sense of humor is smart and savvy. They will use humor to solve all difficult problems and arrange every situation calmly and just right. 4. Is there anyone who knows humorous sentences, the more the better?

Once he slipped, he became a cripple, and then he looked back and flashed his waist.

When he looked back, he still looked down on me.

He refused to leave the wall, and resolutely pulled it out.

It's okay, just when he went to the grave on Qingming Day, he suddenly thought of you. Why did so many people die?

playing with feelings? I'll make you cry rhythmically.

when I like you, you are what you say; when I don't like you, what do you say you are?

The longer I have contact with people, the more I like dogs. Dogs are always dogs, and people are sometimes not people!

Bitches will always be bitches. Even in an economic crisis, you can't afford it!

don't pretend to be happy with your wonderful life, and don't wish me happiness. Do you have that qualification?

Spit is used to count money, not to make sense.

Don't watch what you shouldn't read, don't say what you shouldn't say, don't listen to what you shouldn't think, don't think about what you should do.

I'm not God, I'm just Jesus' father. Is God a man or a woman?

you told me to roll, and I rolled; You asked me to come back, I'm sorry, but I'm far away.

When fellow villagers meet each other, I get shot in the back.

Modesty makes people progress, progress makes people proud, pride makes people backward, and backwardness makes people modest. Vicious cycle, wasting time

I never hold grudges, and I usually report it on the spot when I have grudges

If you are a flower, cows will not dare to shit in the future!

9 oranges are given to 13 children. How to divide them fairly? -Kill 4 children

If she (he) says to you, "Forget me. "You tell each other," I never remember. "

Sometimes I think I'm a good man, too.

The soldier asked the company commander: What should I do if I step on a mine in battle? The company commander was greatly annoyed: *, what can I do? Compensation according to the price for trampling

An ant happened to pass by when the elephant dumped its excrement in the middle of the road. It looked up at the misty peak and couldn't help singing: Yalaso, this is the Qinghai-Tibet Plateau! ~ ~ ~ 5. My primary school life (in humorous sentences)

My primary school life is fleeting. Today, after graduation, I can't help but recall the past ... I still remember that visit to the weather station. We learned a lot, how the weather forecast came from, and why the long thermometer was placed in a wet and soft land. I know why the little ball on the pillar as high as the iron tower keeps going around ... Later, we divided into groups to eat, play games, listen to music and share * * *. On the way back to school, we exaggerated and sang pop songs. I couldn't forget those people and things. It was happy. I still remember the last regrettable sports festival. We were completely sure in this activity. Why? Because we have the title of "strong class in sports", wouldn't it be humiliating if we didn't fight for the first place? However, the result was beyond our expectation, and we lost, just like missing the ball. We only had two collective events because of the heavy academic work in the sixth grade. When we jumped the long rope, we were clearly the first, but the referee was less than a dozen. After our understanding, it turned out that the teacher was in Class One. We were unhappy and secretly scolded her. We were going to discuss it, but in the end we just talked and didn't do it. The stick fell in the face-to-face relay. It's like a stone thrown on the calm water, making ripples. In a blink of an eye, my eyes were covered with fog, and liquid fell down. My mood fell from the valley and I went back to the classroom in silence. Only the teacher comforted us. I can't forget those people and things. It's sad ........................................................................................ I say let's remember each other and never forget each other! There is no such thing as a banquet that must come to an end. We will part eventually, but we will never forget, forget those wonderful six years, because we agreed, right?