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Jia Pingwa said in "Walking Alone":
The days a person has gone through for so many years are messy, regrettable and even embarrassing, but they have erased their immaturity, precipitated themselves, sublimated their experiences and made many people indifferent.
There is no despair in life, and the difficulties again and again are doomed to be unable to withstand the nightmare of the sun and the bumpy bubble. All the trials you have experienced will bring you growth, and all the patience and loss in the future will be gained one day.
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Even if those days are a little lonely, as long as you are always worried about your dreams, what kind of person you want to be and where you want to go, you can always achieve it.
Life is not absolutely fair, but don't worry, don't worry. After losing the person you like and missing the beautiful things, you will find that those regrets are just to teach you to grow.
One day, you will become strong and fearless, because you know that everything will come as scheduled.
1. Only when you get used to someone can you live more like yourself.
I don't know if you have this experience. The older you get, the more you like to be alone. Make a cup of tea and hold a book, and you can spend an afternoon.
I used to like to eat, sleep and play all night in groups of three or five. Things that I couldn't bear before, such as eating alone and going shopping in the supermarket. You can do it yourself now. I like eating and watching movies alone. Even if I walk casually on the road alone, in a daze, it is also a rare comfort.
We all think that this change is because we are old and have no vitality. In fact, this is not the case, but we gradually learn to be alone with ourselves and enjoy a lonely time.
In this life, loneliness is inevitable. It's better to live a simple life than to hang out in circles you don't like and do things you don't like.
There are too many people in life who can't help themselves, so we play the role of an employee in the workplace; At home, you may be parents, husbands, wives and children; Sometimes I feel tired and want to give myself a time to relax. But in front of these social roles, you can only keep smiling and stay strong.
Only when you are alone can you really be yourself. Don't force a smile, please yourself everywhere, and don't always take into account the feelings of others. When you are alone, you can live as yourself without being disturbed and unrestrained.
2. To get used to someone is to give yourself a clean life.
Someone on the Internet asked why some men stay in the car for a while after driving home.
Someone at the bottom replied, because those ten minutes in the car are your own time in a real day. The distance between the car and home is a dividing point. Pushing open the car door is a daily necessities sauce vinegar tea, a husband, a father and son, but not himself. In the car, quietly smoking a cigarette, that kind of feeling is that the body and soul belong to themselves.
Every time I see such words, it seems that I suddenly understand why my father used to smoke a cigarette downstairs before coming back. When he comes back to have dinner with me and finishes his homework, he will light a cigarette on the balcony and look at the distance quietly.
Before, I always thought that my father was pretending to be literary and sad. Now that I have grown up, I realize that the older people get, the more they know. Solitude is a luxury. It means that you don't have to be on standby 24 hours a day, you don't have to worry about things at work at any time, and you don't have to feel overwhelmed by the daily mortgage and car loan.
Some people say that the so-called solitude is an escape from reality. But I don't think so, because it just gives us a transitional space. If a person is stretched too tightly, it is easy to collapse. When you are alone, you can learn to release pressure and relieve inner fatigue without being disturbed by anyone.
Being alone makes us not only learn to think about reality, but also stop meaningless consumption and energy overdraft, get used to being alone and make our hearts more peaceful.
Knowing how to be alone will make life more open.
When everyone becomes an adult, the responsibilities on his shoulders become wider and heavier. Before adulthood, parents sheltered from the wind and rain, and when they were tired, they would have food when they came home. Just let them know that they have no money, but that's not the case as adults. We learned to report good news instead of bad news. Even if I work overtime until late at night without a hot meal, I will tell my parents at the other end of the phone that I went home early.
The responsibilities on an adult's shoulders will keep you very busy. In the twenty hours from opening your eyes every day to going to bed at night, you have more than ten hours to deal with countless people, but it is difficult to find a time to be alone with yourself. There are many things to deal with all day, but when you face yourself, you start to feel at a loss.
Why do some people always feel that life is very bitter? Because most of our troubles come from the fact that it is difficult for us to be honest with our hearts.
People who don't know how to be alone or are afraid of being alone can only live in other people's world and can't get rid of it. People who know how to be alone with themselves can have the possibility of temporary isolation and better adjust their emotions.
This is the world in a hurry. Without everything, it's hard for us to live for ourselves, but it doesn't affect you to take some time for yourself. When you can't find yourself, when you think the world is not worth it, and when you think you need to stop, it's good to leave yourself a minute and a half.
Let go of yourself, calm down and think slowly and quietly. Maybe the road of life will become wider.
"Your loneliness, although failure is glorious" said:
"I used to think that there was only loneliness in the world.
Now I feel lonely that I can become a world. "
The joys and sorrows of life are not connected. We live in this world to master the ability to be alone with ourselves, to understand, accept and enjoy that loneliness.
Learning to be alone is the best time for a person.
Because we will be lonely in the end, walking alone in this long river of life and traveling around Qian Shan alone.