1, don't mess with me, or I'll let you die rhythmically. It doesn't matter that you can't get every apology. 3. I'm really busy recently, and it's hard to guarantee even one 16 hours' sleep. 4. Rock, paper, scissors, whoever loses will take off his pants ~ 5. Playing dumb and doing well is called being stupid. Well done, it is called deep. 6. We walk on the road and kick when we see children, which proves that we are not pedophiles ... 7. If we can't bear it, we will bear it again! 8. I swear never to swear again! 9. You can live like a pig, but you can never be as happy as a pig! 10. My father asked me what kind of life I wanted. I answered money and beauty, and my father punched me in the face; I answered career and love, and my father touched my head appreciatively. 1 1. Sponsor, I am a poor monk. I can't heal my wound without clothes ... I am guilty ... 12. There will be a pig's head who loves you for me. 13. The pull ring of cans loves cans, but the cans are filled with coke. 14. Because I am extremely poor, I have been doing homework for primary schools in winter and summer vacations for a long time, bullying other students for primary school students, and have undertaken the following businesses: coolie handling, fitter welding, water and electricity, bricklayer, smashing walls and digging holes, toilet sewer drainage, VF, C++. NET, Java, asp, assembly, flash, writing papers, taking CET-4 and CET-6. Painless abortion. 15. I always treat handsome guys and money like dirt, and they always look at me like this. Sleep is an art-no one can stop me from pursuing art! 17. After seeing me, you will suddenly find that handsome can be so single-minded! 18. If there is no medical insurance and life insurance, don't try to be brave after dark ... 19. A woman is a girl no matter how ugly she is. If she is a girl, she has the right to be picked up! ! Why don't you hit on me? 20. If you want to wander the rivers and lakes, you'd better be single. 2 1. I'm gone, and China seems to have lost his soul. This view is not good. 22. If nothing happens, I believe that if you can't say a few words to me, you will be conquered by my personality charm and suddenly have the impulse to write me a love letter in your mind. I advise you to save it My 108 mailbox is full of beautiful women's love letters, and there is no room for you. 23. The bombarded head was also combed by lightning. 24. I am 23 years old, everyone loves me, flowers bloom and flowers fall, and the car has a flat tire! ! ! Every time I walk down the street, either a handsome guy turns around or a beautiful woman jumps off a building! 25. Today, I went out and bought some cheap vegetables for rabbits. After a turn, the cheapest cabbage is 2 Jin Yuan. It seems that my rabbit is dying, and I can't afford to keep it. 26. What kind of world is this? People live like dogs, and dogs live like people. 27. Nowadays, there are fewer and fewer female perverts in society. If I meet her, I won't let her go. In order to avoid domestic violence, I decided not to get married. 29. I have done many stupid things, but I don't care. My friends call it self-confidence. 30. I am different from you because I am 3 1. When I was a child, my dream was not to be a scientist. I fantasize that I am the owner of a landlord's house, and the land at home is fertile, with thousands of hectares. I am in a daze all day, doing nothing. I led a group of dog slaves to the streets to flirt with a good girl ... 32. Youth is like toilet paper. It's not enough just to look. As long as there is electricity, it is not enough to use it alone. 34. sleepless night, wandering thoughts, escalating temper, nothing to play lightly, nothing to go around, and death if you don't follow. 35. Where you fall, lie down. 36. Friendly reminder: The user's signature is too personal and is automatically blocked by the system! As an animal, I feel a lot of pressure. . . 38. It is said that 80% of online status displayed on QQ is on-hook, and 80% of offline or invisible status is online. 39. Shh ... Don't tell them that I have done something good, which will affect my image ... 40. I am determined to unify all mankind, so please vote for me. 4 1. As a smoker, you must have three conditions: cigarettes, lighters and shameless charm when smoking. Why is the ash on the table missing? I still remember the phone number on it ... 43. Lingling, Lingling, another ice cream. 44. Now you must look at the object carefully, because there are too many men and women now! 45. People you like don't appear, and those who do don't like it. 46. If you are ugly and want to video, please respect yourself! ! ! 47. I: Yushu is facing the wind, majestic, with eyebrows and stars. I am kind, handsome and absolutely beautiful. I am also a bronze complexion, with strong body and strong arms, soft outside and rigid inside, docile in the wild and dissolute in the melancholy. I am just a role model for men and a gospel for women. Most of the time, I am a woman. More often, I hurt others unconsciously. 49. The grievances that can be said are not grievances; A lover who can be taken away is not a lover. 50. Men cheat, and their IQ is second only to Einstein ~ 5 1. Love is like poop, once the water is washed, it will never come back ~ Love is like poop, once it comes, it can't stop ~ Love is like poop, it's the same and different every time ~ Love is like poop, sometimes it's just a fart after a long effort! 52. As long as the hoe dances well, what corner can't be dug down? 53. Your dirty smile-I can't even find it with Baidu. Dad asked me why I learned to smoke behind his back. I said, "I'm depressed that Taiwan Province can't be saved! I always think of you when I feed the pigs. 56. Flowers often belong to cow dung rather than people who appreciate it. 57. I'm glad I've got enough 1.50 yuan, I can finally surf the Internet again! 58. Fighter in the slag, VIP in the slag. 59. I used to be an angel, really! When I arrived, God kindly said to me, "Go, son, you were born to make up the exam. 60. Between relatives, talking about money hurts feelings; Between lovers, talking about feelings hurts money. 6 1. I'm not as perfect and strong as you think. Money and beauty are enough to conquer me! 62. Don't believe in love at first sight, because you can't see how much money the other person earns at a glance. 63. Animals still have a little compassion, but I don't, so I'm not an animal. 64. I, as far as IQ is concerned, 10 brain teaser, can get 8 answers immediately; On knowledge, when I was 10, I had been studying for 8 years. There are only 10 minutes left until the paper is finished. I can dictate a beautiful article, record it, change up to eight words, and then I can publish it. As far as memory is concerned, I can only remember 8 of 10 phone numbers once. As for endurance, I can pee in the morning 10 until 8 pm the next day ... 65. Is there true love? Of course, there are many TV dramas. 66. Don't test people, they can't stand the test. 67. When will you invite me to dinner? I'll go out and buy you a bag of crispy noodles later. 68. As long as Taiwan Province Province is not recovered, I will fail to pass Grade 4. 69. men can be romantic but not X L, women can be romantic but not abortion! 70. Behind every successful man, there is a woman; Behind every unsuccessful man, there are two women. 1, I am proud of my small breasts, and I return to the provincial sofa: I am a virgin, I am ashamed, and I am a waste paper for my country. 2. The tap water in Shanghai comes from the sea. My brother once believed in Buddhism, but his brother once believed in Buddhism. 3, others laugh at me for being ridiculous, and I also laugh at others for being naughty. 6, my brother is actually very pure, and occasionally he will pretend to be impure. 7, LZ: I want to take a screen name, which requires elegance, allusions and femininity. A glum reply: Aisingiorro. Dysmenorrhea 8. Every XX was a broken-winged angel in his last life. Don't think that drinking pure milk every day will become pure. 10. Landlord: "What is the most awesome thing to say when you see your beloved woman sleeping with another man? ! "The strongest reply:" Hey? ! Dad! ! "1 1, you are a big hooligan. You were a hooligan when you were a child. Don't forget to see your mother when you were born! ..... 12, a dirty song is so wet and easy, and a dirty quilt is so wet and difficult! ! 13, the more you wear every month, the more refined you are-22, how to solve your worries, only little girl 23, patroness, poor monk, if the magic is shallow, if you can't heal through clothes, you will be guilty. . . . 24, don't win the free B 25 under the banner of the object. It's broken and rotten, and its future is uncertain. 27. A man who is not good to women will become a sanitary towel in his next life ... If he is not good to men, he will become TT 28 in his next life, taking medicine or being a virgin ... washing or being a virgin. Don't look at me like that, I have faith! 35. Close my eyes and I see my future. 36. According to the law, a man can only get married at the age of 23, but 18 can be a soldier. This illustrates three problems: first, it is easier to kill than to be a husband; Second, it is more difficult to live than to fight; Third, women are more difficult to deal with than enemies. 37. Everyone else is pretending, and I have to pretend to be experienced! Anonymous: Boss, buy a copy of the Wall Street Journal. Boss: Spicy or spiced? 39. I spend other people's coffee time at work and other people's work time on smoking ... 4 1. I'm your long-lost wild dad, and your mother says it's a secret that can't be told. 42. As a kind of pressure, I often feel great. 43. You farmers can't appreciate my sister's unprecedented beauty ... 44. In the zoo, a bull ran wildly and said to the cow who was still grazing leisurely: Run! The landlord is here! The cow said, what do I care if the landlord comes? The cow said in a hurry: the key is that the landlord likes bragging B best, and the cow runs wildly, asking the cow while running: the landlord likes bragging B best, what are you running for? The bull said helplessly: the landlord who got a thousand knives still likes to pull eggs! 46, a hit-it is to describe a female artist ... 47, men are cows, women are land, only cultivated cows have no cultivated land. 49. Everyone has two ambitions on his chest, but women are bigger ... 50. Really pretend to be forced to face his face without thickness ~ 55. The beast let the girl go! I'll go first! 56. Life is like a happy girl, and the last one is a man.

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