1. Fortunately, when I chase you, you are too heavy to run away.

2. If you don’t chat with me, are you afraid that I will steal your emoticons?

3. You must have a good walk with her while I take the car.

4. There are no stars in your eyes, they are all eye droppings.

5. Those who love me will definitely become rich, and those who don’t love me will make bricks.

6. Narcissism is not a sin. If you are obsessed with me, please wait in line.

7. There must be a road before the car reaches the mountain, and I can’t stop even if there is a road.

8. It’s Chinese Valentine’s Day, do you have any recommendations for good boyfriends?

9. The tortoise can beat the hare, but in fact they just go their own ways.

10. I never hold grudges, and I usually avenge them on the spot.

11. Since I used black toothpaste, my teeth have become whiter and my appearance has become darker.

12. What is your lung capacity? How can you boast so much?

13. The cashier said: I have no change. I’ll give you two plastic bags!

14. Wear perfume when you have money, and apply toilet water when you have no money.

15. Beauty and ugliness are determined by fate, fatness and thinness are determined by heaven. Live by this sentence.

16. Come hang out with me. If I have a bite to eat, you will have a bowl to wash.

17. The weather is so cold that you can even fart to dry your hands.

18. Being ugly is the best self-defense. Ugly people have a safe life.

19. God closed a door for you, and then went to wash up and sleep.

20. When others praise me, I worry that they don’t praise me enough.

21. If a man doesn’t help you put on your wedding dress, give him a cassock.

22. How to transfer money from your brain to a bank card and wait online, urgent!

23. Today’s classmates are so rude and don’t even talk to me in class.

24. Don’t be afraid of drinking dichlorvos, but be afraid of surprises when you open the lid. Enjoy one more bottle.

25. I wish that when I received the red envelope, I would open it and it would say another one.

26. There is a kind of sadness that says, I will reply to you in seconds, but you will reply to me in reincarnation.

27. You still have to have dreams, otherwise there will be nothing to talk about if you drink too much one day.

28. There is so much time in a day, can you spare a second to think about me?

29. Why is everyone celebrating Valentine’s Day, but my family is celebrating Labor Day.

30. After doing homework for 5 minutes, the phone got jealous and coaxed her for 2 hours.

31. Stop asking me what is the standard for being handsome, okay? You’ll know just by looking at me!

32. Trying not to love someone is much harder than trying to love someone.

33. I just want to be a little devil, not afraid of anything. I just want to be surrendered by you.

34. When the weather gets cold, the place I want to go to most is in your arms besides the bed.

35. The recent bad weather makes me feel like opening the refrigerator every time I open the door.

36. Poverty limits so many things, why doesn’t it limit my weight?

37. I don’t know why you smile all day long. You smile as if your rag shoes have exploded.

38. Just forget about scolding you. Only when I beat you will you know that I am both civil and military.

39. The most charming person is Master Kong. Thousands of people follow him every day.

40. Don’t envy us for not having homework during the holidays. Do you know how tiring it is to play for a day?

41. Don’t ask me why I didn’t do well in the exam. It was because the weather was too cold and I was confused.

42. When a girl is alone and alone, it is actually a hooligan behavior for a girl to say she is cold.

43. The so-called true love is when two people are obviously so ugly, but they still worry that the other person will be taken away.

44. When there is thunder, stand under the big tree and say to God, I want to cross over too!

45. The reason for being fat is probably that my small body cannot accommodate my great personality.

46. Try to understand those people you hate, and you will find that the more you look at them, the more you hate them!

47. In fact, appearance is not important. The most important thing in love is feeling. I have no feeling about being ugly.

48. I heard that ugly people should study more. No wonder my mother said that I was not good at studying since I was a child.

49. You always stop and go on the road of love. Are you in a bad situation?

50. In summer, I want to run naked, but in winter, no matter how much I wear, I feel like running naked.

51. I am bleeding in the English translation, but you are in the dark in the mathematical equations.

52. I dropped my phone so many times but it was fine. Later I thought about it, but my height saved it.

53. If you like me, just blink your eyes. If you don’t like me, just put your left foot on your right shoulder.

54. There is no endless banquet in the world, but if you treat me, I can eat more with you.

55. Toss a coin: If it’s heads, go online, if it’s tails, go to bed, and if it’s up, go do your homework.

56. I understand the truth, but I still can’t help but look back when I hear others calling me beautiful.

57. The two main reasons why you can’t finish your homework are sitting next to a funny guy with a mobile phone in his hand.

58. You scold me because you don’t know me well enough, because everyone who knows me wants to hit me.

59. I know very well that you are going to be mentally retarded and out of control, but I really want to see something.

60. Sorry, due to server issues, the message you just sent was lost. Please resend it.

61. We are no longer children. We cannot be coaxed by one lollipop, but at least three.

62. I want to give a negative review to my future partner’s mother. The delivery was too slow and I haven’t received the baby yet.

63. There is always a kind of selfless person in the world. They would rather make themselves unhappy than make others unhappy.

64. Don’t smile at me with your pirated Mona Lisa-like smile. My stomach is not as strong as you think.

65. When I was young, boys liked electric toys and girls liked dolls. As you grow up, it's the other way around.

66. Let’s break up. In fact, I never told you that I copied the love letter from the class next door to Xiaohong.

67. It’s autumn. I opened my wardrobe and saw that it’s time for me to go shopping. I opened my wallet and saw that I’m still young and not cold.

68. Being in a daze, if done well, is called deepness. If you don't do it well, you're more likely to fall asleep.

69. I finally know why my feet are always cold. Because my legs are long and have insufficient blood supply, they are commonly known as cold.

70. I don’t know how others turn pressure into motivation. Anyway, I only turn pressure into appetite.

71. Every time I walk alone at night, I feel so scared. It’s so dark and I’m so beautiful, I’m really afraid that others won’t see me.

72. The wind is so strong outside today, and I am so scared. If everyone else is blown away, I won’t be able to blow them away. That would be so embarrassing.

73. Don’t call your children little bastards, because from a genetic point of view, this is not good for parents.

74. The current underground parking lot is designed like a maze. It takes a long time to find it every time before you find that you don’t have a car.

75. Don’t be too envious of your friends who have more steps than you in the sports rankings. They may not have walked far, they just have short legs.

76. I finally understand why most couriers are men, because if they are women, they will be removed for you halfway.

77. Only single dogs will feel lonely if the second cup is half price, but single pigs will not. Single pigs can drink two cups alone.

78. Everyone who goes to bed after saying "good night" is often still feeling bad half an hour later.

79. I advise you all to stop playing with mobile phones and computers. Recently, I feel that my eyesight is getting worse and worse. I can’t even see money when I open my wallet.

80. Others want to have a romantic date together on Valentine’s Day, but I want to visit your ancestors together during Qingming Festival.

81. I make 2,000 a month and feel that I have reached the peak of my life. I am still single now. I dare not have a girlfriend because I am afraid that my girlfriend will take advantage of my money.

82. Sometimes, I wonder if what I see in my eyes is the same thing as what everyone else in the world sees. Maybe there's a short circuit somewhere in my head.

83. A classmate and I often skip class, and the teacher always asks us to call our parents. Later, my classmate's father said to him: My son, we can't go to school. I've been to school more days this semester than you.