I'm not going to marry a prince, but someone who treats me as a princess.

I watch the time in the morning not to get up, but to see how long I can sleep.

4, there is an embarrassment, and the scars of applause forget to hurt.

5. Send your girlfriend home, no matter how you go.

6. The so-called sleeping goods can be summarized in eight words: spring sleep, summer fatigue, autumn sleep and hibernation.

7. I asked: Is my avatar awesome? He replied: very similar.

8. My love for you will last until the news broadcast finale. ......

9, don't take a person's past, to doubt a person's essence.

10, don't say sorry to me, because we are not important at all.

1 1, a disloyal person, who has never lived, will let me down.

12, confession or being confessed is not terrible. The terrible thing is that the ending is not love, but friends.

13. You don't know how deep the water is until you try it. How do you know if you don't pay?

14, next to every alarm clock, there is a slacker who doesn't want to get up.

15, you did badly in the exam! Broke my heart, not to mention my parents'.

16, I have the ability to pick up girls, but unfortunately I am a girl.

17, since I bought insurance, I have been crossing the road casually.

18, suddenly thought of a very serious academic question, who made 60 points pass.

19. I want to buy things when I am angry. When I buy things, I have to spend money. When I spend money, my money becomes less. I get angry when I have little money.

20. Men's hands are not used to hit women, but to fight the world.

2 1, do you know that sometimes your casual words will affect my mood all day?

22. The little girl selling flowers gave me a hand: Big Brother, buy a flower quickly, and you will know that you are a playboy at first glance.

23. They said that the Internet was fake, and I laughed as if the reality was true.

24. You don't have a doctor's qualification certificate. Why did you say I was crazy?

25. We agreed to have scissors together. One holds a stone, the other a cloth. Who hurt who?

26, losing weight is not so easy, every piece of meat has its temper.

27. A news report said that iph0ne4 stopped the bullets fired by the robbers and saved the owner's life. Someone replied: If we use Nokia, the bullet will bounce back and kill the robbers.

28. I participated in a friend's stand-up comic contest yesterday, and I went alone.

29. The so-called brothers are that if they are rich, they will not meet and have a happy reunion.

30. Starting today, I will try to save money and buy an ATM at the end of the year!

QQ hilarious signature network recommends 85 funny personalized signatures.

1, why does the heart hurt? Because you have a heart attack.

You lied to me, but I don't believe it.

I have no sense of hooliganism at all.

I will graduate soon. Why are those people who secretly love me so calm?

5. I fucking killed and set fire to make you dislike me so much?

6. It is not that no one is chasing, but that there is no suitable one; It's not tall, it just doesn't feel.

7. If life is just like the first time, don't be sentimental. Say goodbye, maybe never again.

8. Don't move! Your left brain is full of water and your right brain is full of flour. It is easy to move, and everything is burnt.

9. Growing up, the only constant is the heart that doesn't like reading.

10, I'm relieved to know that you are not doing well.

1 1. You can't laugh at your mobile phone at home, and your parents will think you are in love.

12, Fahai shouldn't use a tower to curb the White Snake, he should curb Gong Linna.

13, when I lose weight, you must come, because I lose my appetite when I see you.

14, Fahai, take our winter vacation homework.

15, I'm not a genius, because I haven't worn Finch's diapers.

16, don't say that you have nothing in the future. Aren't you sick?

17, I'm blind, just because I took one more look at you in the crowd.

18, the math teacher took us swimming in the sea of questions. As a result, she went ashore and we all drowned.

19, Bajie said: Laughter is just an expression, and it has nothing to do with whether Big Brother is a monkey or not.

20. Come on, I'll hug you, or you'll get lost again.

2 1, I always bow my head in class, and the teacher asked me why. I calmly replied: I sank again, and I suddenly remembered my home.

22. I live in Hutongtou and she lives in Hutongwei. They play together day and night and drink tap water.

23. I want to sleep every night but I can't. I can't get up when I think about it in the morning. We have to endure two painful things every day.

24. Miyoshi students. Our goal, our efforts: delicious, fun and good sleep.

25. People are afraid of famous pigs, and strong dead mice don't feel cold.

26. Don't laugh at me just because I have no taste, just because you have no taste means you have no taste.

Don't mess with me, or I'll slap you in the face with my big shoes!

28. I found that my heart is so broad that I can accommodate many of her.

29. Life is really colorful, but it turns black when I mix it together.

You live in a world of flowers and can have three wives and four concubines.

3 1, why doesn't the country take your face to study imitation bulletproof vests?

If God gives me another chance to meet you, I will turn around and leave.

33. Others like traveling, but we like sleepwalking.

34, finished, you also ignore me, I became a dog ignore.

35. Are you tired? Just tired. Comfort is for the dead.

How happy children will be if their homework can be copied and pasted.

37. Life is like a dream, and I always have insomnia. Life is like a play, I always laugh.

If you were a flower, cows wouldn't dare to shit in the future.

I hope to see the finale of the news broadcast in my lifetime.

40. Don't say you have nothing in the future. Aren't you sick?

4 1, the so-called boudoir like a pig is to buy a pair of shoes with the same feet.

42, a small report card, but can cause a lot of war at home.

43. I cried my eyes out, but you floated up, but tears drowned you.

44. Mom said: Power is out, light candles and watch TV.

45. If I die one day, I will definitely say that it is better than not being afraid of ghosts.

46. Notebook is a huge non-mobile power source for mobile phones, which radiates and enjoys itself.

47. Damn it, were you caught in a door or hit by a UFO?

48. Miss's beard looks so euphemistic that she must be a good family!

49. Another year has passed. Do you find that the only thing you earn is your age?

50. They are all Millennium foxes. What series are you showing me?

5 1. Don't say you don't know what to do. If you don't know, what are you doing now

52, gross, open the fucking door. Gross, gross.

53. It turns out that my mobile phone is of Russian royal descent and can only play Tetris.

54. Everyone has defects, just like an apple bitten by God. Some people have bigger flaws because God especially likes his scent.

55. Funny personality signature Without you around, time is simply slower than the startup speed of my computer.

56. The biggest dream is to hope that one day, when I am walking on the road, a handsome guy will take me home.

57. If you bully me, I will curse you for buying instant noodles without a fork.

58. My stupidity is unparalleled, and my crazy world ranks first. People like me are one in a million.

59. When some people die, it's nothing to do with me. Some people, I can't let go of them.

Don't smile at me with your pirated Mona Lisa smile. My stomach is not as strong as you think.

6 1, I've been alone all my life, and the only one who lives alone is this head. I'm afraid it's not that easy for you to take it away!

Oh, you're welcome Otherwise, the next time you come out, I will set off firecrackers at the door to welcome you out of the toilet.

63. It doesn't matter who is innocent in life and has made a little mistake.

64. All people trapped by love are idiots. The key is to find the key to the prison.

65. I am not a genius because I have never worn Finch's diaper.

66. The story of the wolf tells us that we have been cheated twice, and we must believe him the third time.

67. Not being a bad guy is a waste of your sneaky eyes.

68. Xiansen, please take your hand away. Really, it stained my clothes.

69. I am too expensive. Do you pay by installment?

70. Believe it or not, I slapped you on the wall with one hand and couldn't get it off!

7 1, don't call him an idiot. The premise of brain damage is that he has a brain. The question is, did he?

Relax, I'm not a good person.

73. Is the so-called protein a fool+idiot+essence?

74. Brothers are like brothers and women are like clothes. If anyone touches my brothers and sisters, I will strip them naked.

75. Eat and drink, don't take things to heart.

76. I'm blind only because I took one more look at you in the crowd.

77. Everything in life will change, but that bitch is still mean.

78. This way of speaking is called pull-in rhetoric.

79. My heart is broken. It looks like dumpling stuffing.

80, people are iron, fan is steel, one day does not pretend to panic ~!

8 1, my friend said, hey, you are really good. I haven't seen you for a long time.

82. I weigh myself now and even want to pull out my eyebrows.

83. Others laugh at me for wearing thick clothes, and I laugh at others for being frozen.

84. How long the mouse lives depends on the cat's mood.

When you hold your hand, you will know that your son is ugly and your face is full of tears. If you don't go, I will.

Laugh! 25 super funny personality signatures

1. Gold always shines, but when there is gold everywhere, I don't know which one I am.

The more people I know, the more I like animals.

We live in sewers and still have the right to look up at the stars.

If I can't die in her heart, let her die in my hand.

Put your heart of stone in my cherry mouth.

6. Dust to dust, dirt to dirt, wave goodbye to 250.

7. Right time, right place, right feelings, wrong characters.

8. Don't say anything about you just because you are stupid.

9. I really want to call you grandpa and dad myself.

10. Half the world is laughing at the other half, but the whole world is a fool.

1 1. How many generations does it take to climb from this world to that one?

12. As long as your eyes are straight, you are not afraid of orbital heat.

13. Rogue is a kind of temperament; Old hooligans are a kind of faith.

14. What is the biggest difference between Jesus and Sakyamuni? They have big curly hair and small curly hair.

15. There is no other half 100, only two people get 50 points!

16. What matters in life is not where you stand, but the direction you face.

17. Q: What are the most commonly used functions of mobile phones? A: It depends on time. Q: What is the most exciting function of the mobile phone? A: Vibration.

18. When dry wood meets fire, it is called Ming Sao; Wet wood meets small flames, which is a man show.

19. Successful men can earn more money than their wives spend, and successful women can also find such men.

20. If you just wait, all that will happen is that you get old.

2 1. Luck is when an opportunity happens to bump into your efforts.

22. Be a woman in the next life and marry a man like me.

23. When in love, couples often lament what virtue they have accumulated in their previous lives; After marriage, couples often wonder what they did in their last life. It is really a world of ice and fire.

24. How much I can sacrifice for it, and how much I want to sacrifice for it now.

25. The only feeling I have for you now is that I have no feeling.

Announce the 40 most shocking funny personality signatures.

Recently released 40 of the most shocking funny personality signatures.

1, men always say one thing and do another, and bring one when it is critical.

After studying for more than ten years, I think it is better to mix in kindergarten.

Wage is like a period, once a month, and it will be gone in a week or so.

Xiao San, thank you for taking away the man who is not worthy of my love. Xiao Si, thank you for your revenge.

5, it is difficult to be a woman these days, you are open, people say you are coquettish; Be traditional. People say you pretend.

I won't tell you if you kill me. You haven't made a beauty plan!

7. In order to find out the reason of insomnia last night, I have insomnia again tonight.

8. Modern people's living conditions: attend today's class, sleep yesterday's sleep and spend tomorrow's money.

9. I'm stupid and I'm happy. I'm two years old and I'm healthy.

10, I love you! In your eyes, yes, I am your stumbling block.

1 1, whoever ignores me again, I will tell him a story: once upon a time, there was a man who didn't like talking to me and died the next day.

12. Life grinds us around and makes us roll further.

13, in fact, we can boil all the problems down to two kinds: one is that we are hungry and have no food; One is full.

14 What is happiness? Happiness is that cats eat fish, dogs eat meat, and Altman beats small monsters.

15 When it thunders, stand under the big tree and say to God: I want to live too! ! !

16, Li Bai was about to go by boat when he suddenly heard singing on the shore. Make a scene, leisurely and dazzling national style.

17, do you know how disgusting you are? Your mother threw up the first time she felt your presence! !

18 or 10086 suits me. I sent him two short messages and he replied to me three times.

San Xiao cried. Because Xiao Si ruined its beautiful life.

20. You give 60 points, I give 60 points. Why don't we pay a dollar and two cents?

2 1. There are always a few people. The whole class laughed as soon as the teacher told them to get up and answer questions.

22. A lazy person like me will take the initiative to chat with you every day, which shows how much I love you.

23. Mathematics is fire, lighting the lamp of physics; Physics is a lamp that illuminates the road of chemistry; Chemistry is the road, leading to the pit of biology; Biology is a pit where people who study science are buried.

24. It is better to spend money than to spend it.

25. The teacher explained the meaning of handsome on the blackboard. I'm confused. My deskmate quietly handed me a mirror. Suddenly, I understood.

26. I once had a pair of wings, but I didn't use them to soar in the sky, but put them in a pot to stew soup.

27. I took my photo as a computer desktop on a whim and then the computer was poisoned.

28. What are the two little drags on the giraffe's head? Some people say that it is a deer walker, and the zoo wifi depends on it!

On the evening of 29.30, I made an appointment with my classmates to watch the Spring Festival Gala and burn winter vacation homework to keep warm.

30. What happened to my flat chest? Don't you know that I have leveled the stability of our school?

3 1, I saw my predecessor send a sad message in QQ space, saying that I broke up with mistress, and I was very sad or something. I went in and praised it.

32. Today, my father bought me two goldfish, and one of them drowned. I am sad.

33. I tried to turn the salted fish over during the exam. Damn it, I didn't expect it to stick.

34. I skipped classes too much. I wanted to go to class yesterday. Seeing the teacher, the teacher was surprised and said, I haven't seen you for so long, and I have grown so big.

35. If we burn incense for one year, we can meet, burn incense for three years, we can get to know each other, and burn incense for ten years, we can cherish each other. Then I will convert to Christianity!

36. You can't even cheat. How can a teacher trust you to enter the society?

As long as you call me, even if I am in the grave, there will be a force coming out and standing up to follow you.

38. Everyone said that mistress is a bitch, but forgot to weigh whether the man who was taken away really loves you.

If you use it skillfully, it's none of my business and none of your business, you can save 80% of your life time.

40. The teacher said: The final exam is coming soon, so don't fall in love and quarrel early, so as not to affect your mood; Don't confess without puppy love, lest you be rejected and affect your mood.