"Society is the sum of relationships formed between people. Human production, consumption, entertainment, politics and education all belong to the category of social activities. Society refers to an unchangeable structure that people living together in a specific environment can maintain for a long time and cannot leave each other. "

- 0 1

Everyone will consciously form their own circle in society.

Different social status, different abilities, different personal experiences and different hobbies will lead to countless circles. Circles are very important. Generally speaking, it can make you feel comfortable and get help.

But the whole family tightened their belts just to send their children to a higher circle. Is it really worth it? Is it meaningful?

- 02

Let me talk about my personal experience. I live in a second-tier capital city. My husband and I are both employees of state-owned enterprises. Our family's annual income is about 300,000, and we have two complete houses (I have a strong sense of crisis and always worry about future changes, and I have to save100,000 for my children every year). )。 Both parents are retired, and a university teacher and another civil servant have full housing, so we don't have to bear it.

The family condition is in the bottom ten in the children's class. I am a person who is very attentive to children. Get along with people whose economic conditions are mostly better than their own, not to mention personal connections, and feel great pressure every day. 20 17, my son goes to primary school, and he is lucky. With the help of relatives, he went to a primary school in this city without spending much money. In fact, the tuition fee is not very expensive, about 20 thousand a year, but many people have paid nearly 300 thousand sponsorship fees for this quota.

The contacts in the circle, yes, found that there are many powerful roles among parents after school started. Vice president of university, president of provincial high court, boss of state-owned enterprise (grandfather), construction tycoon, rich second generation and so on. If the air quality is poor, some parents will buy expensive purifiers at their own expense and send them to the class. Children will queue up for hot water after class, and some parents will immediately add high-end water heaters to the class. It's not enough to charge each child 1000 yuan for class every semester. In order to help children live and study, several mothers specialize in purchasing all kinds of supplies, and invite people from the cleaning company to clean and disinfect them every week ... Every one or two months, there is a "group building" activity in the class, and the per capita income is 1-200. We once organized a welcome dinner with a per capita income of 500+. There are many working-class people in our group, so we only organized a trip, including Bali during the Spring Festival, daytime flights and five-star hotels, with a per capita income of more than 8,000. Other close parents went to Hong Kong and Japan together. As far as I know, other classes go to Europe together for the same purpose as us, just for the children to play together.

If you think these parents are comparing themselves, I don't think so. People wear coconuts every day, and they won't change into cloth shoes to make friends with you! Don't say that's all I care about. It's pathetic. I am not blind after all! Cover your face ... Compared with the parents we met in kindergarten, these parents are really much better, and they wholeheartedly escort their children's learning. Maybe it is as easy for people to buy a purifier for their class as it is for us to buy a watering can. But as a parent, sometimes the pressure is really great. Almost all the 20 thousand English classes a year have been signed up. Are you registered or not? In order to save the children's time, the mother spent 1000 yuan for the teacher to teach a piano lesson in 600 yuan. After the league is completed, can adults not feel inferior to rows of high-end cars? As soon as you saw100000, your mother was relieved, and when you turned around, you saw someone driving the X5. It turns out that the scooter was only opened that day.

- 03

What is more enviable is the education and knowledge of those parents. In the son's class, parents with master's degrees can't count with both hands. The sports meeting needs parents' volunteers, and the places are robbed in an instant; In school activities, you look at the PPT made by other people's parents, and then at your own, feeling that your own is to prove what is perfunctory;

During the research activities, some parents were carrying a SLR, and they were also responsible for repairing the film later ... Where am I? I am at work from 8: 30 to 6: 00! In short, in this case in our family, we are often hanged ... Although we are often hanged in life, hanging by 10% people in the same circle is completely different from hanging by 60% people.

Speaking of topics, do you have any connections? What can we do besides getting to know each other? You can talk about children, gossip and spit on your husband. Next, have you discussed the industry form with others? Do you have any ideas about discussing art with others? To tell the truth, I choose to shut up when other mothers discuss skin care products, because I haven't used so much, I can't afford to use it! Even if we discuss travel together, when you offered to buy the flight at seven o'clock and get a 60% discount on the air ticket, some parents said it was too early, so let the children sleep more and buy the one at eleven o'clock! At first glance, a plane ticket costs five or six hundred dollars in an instant. You say, are you in or out?

- 04

The so-called connections, when you can't reach the same level as others, you can only know each other. If you want to contract projects, expand your career and improve your life through this relationship, if you can achieve mutual achievements at different levels, don't even think about it. Circles are important, but I can't get in. My close parents now have similar consumption views. I am already a peaceful person, and I still feel stressed.

The truth is this, but it feels good to get along with each other every day. Because these parents are generally well-educated and well-informed, they don't care about trivial matters and don't make trouble, but apart from talking about their children and studying, their relationship will not be closer. But it's a different mood to come here to keep contacts. Because of my work, I marginalized myself. Unless the whole class takes part in activities, the rest is to get together with a few comfortable mothers occasionally.

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After all, is the circle important? Important. But the essence of the circle, in the final analysis, is the exchange of interests. People in the quality circle recognize you, not because you are in the quality circle, but because you are "quality". Different circles, don't force.

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