(Crosstalk)

Crosstalk is an art.

B yes.

A It wasn't called art in the old society.

B If it's not art, what's it called?

A calls this business.

B Yes, it used to be called commerce.

A said crosstalk tapes sell bucket paper (bucket paper is a kind of handmade paper with dark gray color, which is generally used as toilet paper. )?

B never heard of it.

How can it be called business? I'm not buying or selling. I'm performing on the stage. If it's business, it's done by capitalists.

B by the way, business.

Capitalist A is different from us. They live by exploitation.

The bigger the capitalist, the more ways to exploit people.

There are also intrigues among capitalists.

B compete with each other and crowd out each other.

A For example, there are two department stores on this road, which will disturb the neighbors. Invited a band.

What's the matter?

A use this to attract customers. In order to make more money, a good model hangs a red list at the entrance of the center, which reads: "Open a new card and reduce the price by 8%."

B it's cheaper here.

At first glance, A can't do it. He reduces the price by 8%, and my business is over. So he hung a piece of red cloth, which read: "anniversary, buy one and get one free."

B is cheaper than eight buttons.

At first glance, A changed the word again: "Open a new card and reduce the price by 8%."

B oh, it's colored.

On the other hand, A read it and wrote: "anniversary, buy one get one free, big sacrifice."

B sacrifice?

A, you think, that side has been injured, but this side has not been sacrificed!

B: OK.

A band followed closely. This way: dadada dadada ... that road: Lvliang swing. ...

B ho!

A looks like a funeral.

B It's all about money.

Capitalist A would rather spend 30% of his capital on advertising in order to make money.

B what's the advertisement?

Newspaper advertisements, movie advertisements, radio stations. ...

Radio B still advertises?

A: In the past, when you listened to the radio, all the advertisements were: "Gentlemen, would you like some fragrant tea? Please buy it at Zhengxingde Tea House. Zhengxingde Tea House makes its own red and green scented tea. Zhengxingde Tea House is located at Qianmen Street 1765. Welcome everyone to comment on the guidance. "

B Yes, this is the word used in advertisements in the past.

A big enterprise does such an advertisement.

Small business?

A can't turn on the radio.

B what?

He can't afford advertising. You let the seller of baked sweet potatoes advertise on the radio. Then how to do it? Besides, there is no way to make up the word: "gentlemen, would you like to eat some baked sweet potato with red skin and yellow meat, which is rich in nutrition and contains a lot of vitamin C? We have all kinds of steamed and baked goods. If you want to eat, please go ... "

B Where can I buy it?

Where there is a, buy it!

This is nonsense!

Such a small enterprise doesn't do this kind of advertising. Small business is to shout.

B: That's right.

A In Beijing before, small businesses shouted the most. For example, candied haws are not sold blindly in the east, west, north and south.

Yes, I pay attention to nine tones and eighteen tones. What do you call North City?

A "honey, come on, sugar-coated haws, come on-"

B Where to Xicheng?

The phrase "the gourd is rock sugar."

B: Save some trouble here and go to Cheng Nan?

A "gourd"

B it's easier!

A went to Dongan market to set up a stall and shouted fresh: "Just dip it!" "

B doesn't even have the word gourd!

One in Beijing is called sugar-coated gourd, and the other in Tianjin is called Tang Dun. The easiest word to shout out is: "Duner-"

B: That's right.

This is Sugar-Coated Berry. There are also fruit sellers: "Sweet fruit! Smell the smell of fruit! "

B very good.

A It's like singing a folk song. If you can remember music, you can write it down and sing it beautifully.

B, is this also an energy spectrum?

I have scored. If you don't believe me, hum it.

All right, you hum.

What does A sell?

B Well ... I don't know!

This is for peas.

B I remember selling peas like this: "A beef tendon pea!" "

first

B "Give peas more than hazelnuts."

first

B "Give more peas."

first

B hey! Just like singing.

A is the most particular about selling cloth ends. There are two kinds in Tianjin and two kinds in Beijing.

B What are the two kinds in Tianjin?

One is carrying a bag in an alley, and the other is setting up a stall in the street.

How to shout in B-string Hutong?

A I'll learn from you: "buy striped cloth, make lining, make noodles, assorted whites, make pants and make coats."

Ah, it all smells like this. Where is the booth?

If you are not careful, you will be scared.

B is it?

A: When he shouted, he was both surprised and hypocritical. Nervous people dare not hit him on the head!

B, you learn.

A: "Look at this piece. It's really good. Will not lose its true colors. I will buy it home and make a trousers coat. "

B ho!

These are two kinds of fabrics in Tianjin.

B how about Beijing?

There are two kinds of A, one is soft and the other is hard.

You taught me to learn this soft tune.

A: "this call is cheap, just don't bargain." This piece is white. Why is it so white? Why is it so white? Hey, why are you so white? "

B I don't know. Wow!

A: "Why is it so white? It was angry with the first snow and wouldn't let the second frost. Let's go over the white face of Fuxing in the Asian Games again. When you buy your old house, you can make a quilt. It is forbidden to wash, cover, drag and push! "

B what's wrong?

A it's full

B may describe his cloth as strong.

A: I'll change it for a black one. This is German green.

B Yes, it used to be said that German dyes were good.

A "this German green, how so dark? Why is it so dark? Hey, why do you think it's so dark? "

B ... again!

A: "Why is it so dark? I was so angry that Zhang Fei refused to let Li Kui jy, and the Asian Games passed the Black Jingde of the Tang Dynasty. I sent charcoal in Dongshan and shaved coal in Xishan. I opened a coal factory for two days and sold coal for two days. This is also a two-day coal shop manned. This piece of German blue is really dyed by Germany and really made by a German. The nickname is "three fears". What do you mean "three fears"? It is not afraid of washing, it is not afraid of rain, it is not afraid of sun, no matter how you wash it, it will not fade! "

Oh, German green.

A piece of white cloth!

B white cloth?

A "white cloth does not fade!"

B nonsense! Do you have faded white cloth?

A "How wide the face is, how thick the cloth blank is, and how fast the scissors can't hinge!" "

Boss b?

Iron plate!

Where is iron plate B? How to cut a coat?

You can't cut a pair of scissors, you have to roll them with steel mill.

B sew with needle and thread after rolling?

A rivet is riveted, welded, and worn out after welding.

Doctor B.

A boiler!

Running boilers all over the street?

A There is another kind that sells cloth heads in a hard tone.

B Then how do you shout?

A leader like this is a liar. He sells cloth without a ruler.

How do you measure it?

Armour reaches out to Armour's hand.

How much is one second?

A is five feet long, regardless of height, and the cloth seller is big and tall, five feet long; This is a short man who used to be five feet tall.

B: OK.

A This kind of cloth seller pays attention to lying. For example, this cloth is worth one dollar, and he asks you for three. Slowly, the price fell, you bought it, and you lost.

B: That's right.

But sometimes he doesn't know for himself. I'll teach you how to sell cloth ends.

Second, study.

You have to do me a favor.

B What can I do for you?

You should be my little friend and weigh this cloth. When I reduce the price, you want to say a few words.

What did b say?

A "don't give up, look at this, if you give up again, you will lose."

All right.

A loud "ah ...".

B "lost!"

What, just pay?

B Oh, it's too early!

You can say it when I make a concession.

Line B.

"Ah, this piece is cheap, not so a piece, but this piece, this piece is very different. That one was called German Green just now, and that one is now an ocean. Wow. Come here again, this brand called Qingyu, Yindan Shilin cloth. You bought this stone forest cloth in your hometown, so put it on your body and walk in the street. I really don't know which size I have been when I look at it. This piece of stone forest cloth is wide and long, and it has to be tall and big, and it has to be a big fat man with three arms, one big and four big, with a big head and a big ass, and two big thick legs. The fat is big enough. You bought this piece of stone forest cloth from a big cloth shop, saying that you always have to call the roll. When you arrive in Beijing, you should pay attention to the Eight Emperors. When we arrive at Ruifuxiang, Ruilin Lane, Guangsheng Lane, Yihua Lane and Xiangyi, the headline of the gallery faces south, and there is a sense of modesty. When you arrive at Eight Emperors, you can buy a foot for 18 cents. Without 18 cents, you can't buy such a thin skin, so thick and so good. Come to our stall, the same goods, the same price, the same market, no one will buy rags from small cloth stalls! When you come to our booth, you have time to listen to our size. Let's make a concession. One foot is five feet, two feet is ten feet, three feet is fifteen feet, four feet is twenty feet and one foot is twenty feet. When I arrived at Dabupu, I bought one foot and 18 cents, ten feet and 18 cents, and 28 16 was 3.6 yuan. When we arrived at our booth, we didn't need three dollars and six cents. You don't want three dollars and two cents. It doesn't matter if you don't want three dollars. I have to let go, because I am an extra branch. Go to 20 cents, let 20 cents, you give it to 2.6 yuan; Remove the dime, let the dime give you two dollars and four cents, remove two cents and let the two cents give you two dollars. That can be said to be wrapped in cloth. I want two yuan, but I don't want to sell it now. What happened? I lost my money and shouted. My apprentice knew that the thugs were not paid, so he knitted some coarse cloth, blue cloth and big white cloth. He will learn very well. Where is the skirt? The old lady named fourth brother Hua is a cat-flowers, flowers, flowers, pancakes! This is not two dollars; Go to 20 cents, let 20 cents, you give a dollar and six cents; To a hair, let a hair you give a piece of four; If you ask for another twenty cents, you will give one or two cents; Go to 20 cents a dollar; Not a dollar. Go to fifty cents and earn fifty cents ... "

B how much is left?

Garber took it!