Wukong: Dig, what did you say? It's cruel. You won't let me go to Sina, you might as well let me die!
Guanyin: Shh ~ ~ ~ Don't talk, that monk is coming! I want to go first! (Guanyin cancelled ~ ~ ~)
Wukong: Huh? Is this the monk?
Act two,
The Tang Priest came slowly from the audience. (Walking to the Monkey King's prone position and doing some turning movements) Tang Priest: According to the map, this should be it, right?
Wukong: Ah! You stepped on my hand!
Tang Priest: (facing the Monkey King) Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't notice you, turtle.
Wukong: Tortoise?
Tang Priest: Really? But I really haven't seen a turtle like you with a big shell and an old monkey face.
Wukong: It seems that Guanyin is right. With your IQ, none of you can reach Tianzhu. ...
Tang Priest: Oh? You also know Guanyin? She must be the hottest MM in the local area. I wonder if you know there is a monkey named the Monkey King here?
Wukong: Here is my business card. (or a card comes out)
Tang Priest: Oh? Your name is the Monkey King, too? What a coincidence! Then you must know someone with the same name nearby?
Wukong: Shit! Think about it with your heel. You should think that I am the monkey you are looking for, right? I'm trapped under the mountain!
Tang Priest: Really? Don't lie to me. Do you think I'm a fool?
Wukong: Fool? Are you a fool? Are you praising yourself or calling a fool? How can you be such a stupid fool?
Tang Priest: Did you see this too? If I'm not stupid, who wants to come out and do this job?
Wukong: OK, OK, now you go to the top of the mountain, take off the seal on it, and I can go with you to learn the scriptures.
Tang Priest: OK, you wait (walking behind the Monkey King).
Wukong: Hey ~ ~ ~ ~ Did you find it ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Tang Priest: I found it ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ but I don't know which one ~ ~ ~ ~
Wukong: Shit! How many notes were posted on it? Tang Priest: Many! If you want to be rich, there are many kinds of trees. There is only one good one. Stephen Chow community can't go for nothing. Classic blockbuster, the magic treasure law of blue city volunteers will be released soon. Photographing is forbidden here, and offenders will be fined. ...
Wukong: Yes, yes, that's the photo.
Tang Priest: (doing injury) OK! I already took it off!
Wukong: OK! Go away!
Tang Priest stepped back.
Wukong: A little further. ...
Take a few steps back
Wukong: A little further. ...
Back off again ...
Wukong: A little further. ...
Tang Priest: Shit! It's far from India ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Wukong: I'm coming out!
The Monkey King stood up and walked to the Tang Priest!
Tang Priest: Huh? The mountain didn't fall, so why did you come out?
Wukong: You climbed out of the cave and knocked down the mountain?
Tang Priest: Did you climb out? Seals?
Wukong: it's just a formality ... in fact, the shelf life of the seal has long passed, and no one has come to replace it. After-sales service is really ~ ~ poor! Let's leave now.
Tang Priest: You are naked, aren't you?
Wukong: What's wrong with me?
Tang Priest: What happened to Mao? If I hadn't become a monk, I would have more hair than you! Here, put this on.
(Facing the Monkey King, making an attack)
Wukong: Master, it's far from the Western Heaven. If you keep doing this, I'm afraid you won't get there.
Tang Priest: What's wrong?
Wukong: I'm really naked, but it won't help if you put this hoop on my head.
Tang Priest: Why so much nonsense? Put it on when I tell you to!
Wukong: Shit! If it weren't for Guanyin MM's face, I might kill you with a stick!
Tang Priest:%% # # ................................)-(Magic)
Wukong: Huh? My head! (doing harm)
Tang Priest: Ha ha ha! Are you scared? (doing happy actions)
Wukong: Is this a long-standing "shake your head curse" in Jianghu? (Sit down)
Tang Priest: Yes, once you have heard this mantra of shaking your head, you will be addicted to it immediately. If you don't listen for a day, your blood will flow backwards; If you don't listen for two days, your whole body will fester; If you don't listen for three days, you will suffer from deficiency of both qi and blood, chloasma on your face, enlarged prostate and menopausal symptoms. Even if you eat Gaizhonggai oral liquid produced by Harbin Pharmaceutical No.6 Factory, it won't save you!
Wukong: How vicious!
Tang Priest: Hehe, as the saying goes, no poison is not a husband, and a small amount is not a gentleman!
Wukong: I'll listen to you from now on ... damn it, what is the "shake your head curse"? I hate it!
Tang Priest: Ah! Wukong! Not good!
Wukong: What's the matter?
Tang Priest: There are monsters! ! ! (The monster comes to the stage from behind the Monkey King and walks in the direction of Tang Priest)
Wukong: Master, don't be afraid. Look at me (face the monster and attack. The monster stops and looks at the Monkey King.
Wukong: Out! Old monster, I won't know you unless you turn yourself into a fat man. Do you want to eat my master?
Monster: Gee, I won't eat him. Looks like he's sour!
Wukong: Do you want to hit on my master?
Monster: laughing, digging Kaka, hitting on him? That's hilarious. I might as well meet him in Ng Man Tat.
Tang Priest: (walking towards the monster) You are not here or there. You make us feel at a loss. I'm so confused and helpless!
Monster: Are you bored? I just wrote a poem. I am not satisfied with the sentence "A bird perches on a tree by the pool, and a demon pushes the moon down the door". I don't know whether to push or knock. I am thinking about it. Leave me alone!
At this time, the director came from the audience and bowed to the audience: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to participate in the prize-winning quiz of this play. Who knows whether the monster finally pushed or typed? Welcome to broadcast the quiz hotline 16854 188 (I am your father accidentally! The prize of this quiz is a weasel toilet phone provided by Tianjin Weasel Co., Ltd. 168, the toilet is waiting for you, and then walk off the stage!
Tang Priest: Wow, it turned out to be a poet. I've heard a lot about him!
Monster: I'll keep thinking about it. Go first, you can speak slowly (walk off the stage).
Tang Priest: OK, bye. Remember to contact me when you are free. I will miss you! Honey!
Wukong: Holy shit, what a world! Monks are not like monks, and demons are not like demons!
Tang Priest, empty baby, let's go quickly! Two people!
Act III:
Narrator: On this day, Tang Priest and the Monkey King went to a Okawabe (landing SLM can be equipped by the river).
Tang Priest: Wukong, why don't you go?
Wukong: There is a river ahead!
Tang Priest: What is a river? Why don't you just beat him to death? Wukong: Look, this is the river.
Tang Priest: Oh, this is a river! What a big river, what a big water, it really makes me want to sing poetry!
Do a happy action: "The weather shines on the mountains, the ocean drains the golden river, the spring flowers are still there, and every grain is hard!" "
Bailong came to the stage and said, "Good poem, good poem, but wouldn't it be better to change the last two sentences to" the wild fire is not clean, and the red and brown waves are clear "? "
Tang Priest facing White Dragon: Thank you for your advice. May I ask the name of your benefactor?
Bailong went to the Tang Priest and made a weeping gesture: Master, I have been waiting for you for a long time! 5555555
Tang Priest: Who? Me? Wrong person!
Bailong: Yes, that's you. Guanyin JJ told me to wait for you here.
Tang priest: Guanyin again? How did you get here?
Bailong: I was originally the third prince of the East China Sea Dragon King. I didn't expect my girl to hang a Kai Zi behind my back, and they left on my wedding night! I smashed the new house in a rage. I burned a night pearl, but I didn't expect this bead to be a gift from the Jade Emperor. The jade emperor punished me for saying tongue twisters, but I couldn't, so I was demoted here! Wukong: Tongue twister? What do you mean?
Bailong: It means "the old monk carries the soup to the tower, and the tower slides with the soup and burns the tower".
Tang Priest: Oh? Isn't what you said quite good?
Bailong: Nonsense, I have been practicing here for more than fifty years!
Tang Priest: I see. How about I teach you a new one? "Eight hundred pacesetter run north slope, north slope artillery run side by side. The artillery did not dare to step on the pacesetter, and the pacesetter did not dare to touch the artillery gun. "
Wukong: What happened to the stopwatch? Say tongue twister again, I'm going to lose my temper! Tang Priest: Wukong, you don't understand this. Tongue twister is a language game widely circulated among the people. Words with confusing initials, finals or tones are combined into overlapping sentences, which requires you to pronounce them quickly in one breath. When you are fast, your pronunciation is easy to make mistakes!
Wukong: Shit! Get down to business!
Bailong: Oh, master, according to the script, I should become a white horse to carry ~ ~ ~ ~ Why don't you go to learn the scriptures?
Tang Priest: Hum! Good idea! I want a BMW!
Bailong: Famous car!
Tang Priest: Are you afraid?
The commentator rushed to the Tang Priest, made an angry gesture and shouted, Cut!
Tang Priest: Hey! No need, right? Every episode, you come out and stop?
Director: BMW! Our funds are running out. How can we get props for you?
Tang Priest: BMW, the best is only a few hundred thousand.
Director: hundreds of thousands? No, let alone a BMW. Puma can't afford it, can it?
Tang Priest: OK, again!
Bailong: Oh, master, according to the script, I should become a white horse to carry ~ ~ ~ ~ Why don't you go to learn the scriptures?
Tang Priest: Amitabha! (Equipped with Dharma warfare and doing magic moves)
Tang Priest: Give me strength ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ I ~ ~ ~ I am a ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Wukong: Cyril?
Bailong: It's my turn! (release a big bear)
Everyone fell to the ground, Tang Priest: Are you kidding, Bear?
Director: Sorry, the funds are really insufficient. Fortunately, my sister-in-law's second uncle's aunt's dry daughter works in the zoo and just borrowed a bear. You can make do with riding first! .
Bailong: Then please change it to white. This black bear is bad for my image!
Tang Priest: Yes, who has seen Tang Priest go out on a bear?
Director: Ladies and gentlemen, let's make do. Dinner tonight is on me.
Tang Priest: Good! Wukong ~ ~
Wukong: What happened to Master?
Tang Priest, go.
Wukong: Where are you going?
Tang Priest: Tianzhu ...
Wukong put the bear away and joined the Tang Priest's team. White Dragon also joined the Tang Priest's team and retired.
The director attacked the audience: to know what will happen next, please listen to the next chapter!
Narrator: At sunset, Wukong was carrying a burden, and Tang Priest was riding a black bear and heading for Tianzhu in the afterglow of sunset. ...