There are few stars tonight, and many are hiding in the clouds. Just like some people write loneliness on their faces, some people bury loneliness in their hearts. I may belong to the latter because of my career and vagrancy. In my unique leisure time, I am used to returning to the dormitory soon after work at night. Instead, I wander in the park, think, patrol, walk past every security post, salute the security guards with a smile, sprinkle my figure under rows of neon lights, and pin my thoughts and fantasies on the silent night.
Inadvertently, I will think of the budding feelings when I was a teenager. That year, in the moonlight, the winding pavilions between heaven and earth gently sounded cautious footsteps, but the cool evening breeze was awake with hot cheeks and shy and reserved juvenile feelings, and never expressed his inner gentleness. From the foggy path at night to the brightly lit street corner, time passes silently, and language is superfluous in the eyes. When the other person leaves gracefully with a smile, you can feel a deep gaze behind you. The figure finally melted into the wind in the middle of the night and entered the faint sad heart of the teenager. I once dreamily explored the miracle of "looking for him for thousands of times, suddenly looking back, people are under the dim light", but after a long time, I finally understand that there are few miracles on earth, so I no longer look for things that belong to dreams in my dreams.
Looking back, like many people, I spent my whole life pursuing the so-called "achievement". When I look back, I realize that youth has long gone, and there will be mountains and rivers on my once smooth cheeks. Alas, in life, many times, we often pursue the so-called "love" with infatuation, and after wandering, we only taste that it is just a cup of bitter wine. The person we really love is actually ourselves! Isn't it? If people don't even love themselves, what can they talk about loving others?
In the pledge of eternal love, the so-called hundred years, thousand years or even forever are just the good wishes of the fascinated authorities. In fact, everything will change with the change of time, place and environment, and it will not last longer than everyone's own life anyway. Cherish the present and cherish the feelings you already have. Therefore, I once sneered at the fanatical slogan of "Long live love": at best, "Love is eighty years old, long live is just empty!" Isn't it? Life is over, how can love persist? It is difficult and valuable to live for a hundred years and love for eighty years. Speaking of loyalty and righteousness, the romantic Tang Xuanzong and the truly beautiful Yang Yuhuan, even on the seventh day of July, in the Palace of Eternal Life, made a big wish of "being husband and wife forever". Once the three armies were restless at the foot of Mawei slope, wouldn't it be Xiangyu meteorite? And how did the "Emperor Tai-huang" find the once "heartthrob" Yang?
Sighing how time flies, I still don't know what to do in my short life. Only when the feelings of water flow through the long canal of memory from time to time, will water slowly form some characters on the shore wall of the long canal. Nowadays, the title pages of diaries and articles, like old dark red maple leaves, show the distance between time and space in their hearts, record a long-lost friendship and leave some scratches that can be touched late at night. I used to cherish these leaf-like fragments, but they have been attributed to warm history. A string of words is a voice, or a pearl condensed with happy or bitter tears. The words are reflected on the paper, the voice is a monologue at night, and those pearls are as vivid as falling into the disk from time to time.
Often moved, moved by the details of life, moved by those things in life that have long passed away. Many past events are like smoke and fog, but they are fleeting. How many stories have been vaguely outlined in my mind's memory, one by one old knowledge, one by one past, gradually dusty in the quicksand of the years. Time and space pull the distance very far, but the long-lost memory is very close. "Worry and worry accumulate, but joy and happiness are forgotten." I believe that if there is an afterlife, I will never forget the beauty accumulated in my heart, even if I must drink Meng Po Tang on the way to reincarnation.
I think, life is just a passer-by in the world of mortals, and there are many people and things to meet at every stop. After a short encounter with all kinds of things, I am destined to leave with some blessings or happiness, pain, luck and regret. After that, you will face another beautiful or barren scenery, meet other people or things, gain and experience the same ending as the last stop.
Perhaps, when the train of life arrives at the next stop, I won't have to start again. A fetter, an attachment, may make me trapped in a corner of the world. Is it okay? The heart is melancholy, because people always pursue dreams in beautiful fantasies, and prove the actual value of their lives with the imagination of life and the efforts of life. In the long river of life, the boat of life was born on the flowing water as a carrier, and no one can stop flowing forever.
In the middle of the night, staring at the sky, grasping the lonely side, thinking like huge wings open. I am not a philosopher or a wise man. I just want to think about a meaningless life. You got it? I don't think I understand. Even if I understand, what should I do? Just like the structural relationship between molecules, electrons and atoms described in physics, people are doomed to never leave the life track that has already been delineated! Only at this moment, the body seems to be nothing, and only the monologue of the mind is the dawn of self-awareness.
I have been immersed in this thought for a long time. I hope my dream tonight can be like this new moon, like a hook in the sky and water. Just at this moment, I was grazing in the wilderness of my heart, and my heart hovered in the sky of thought like a bird, unwilling to fly away for a long time …