This data shocked the whole society! What are the reasons why so many children suffer from "depression"? Many people attribute the reason to children's study pressure and family's insufficient care for children.
In fact, such a pot is simply beyond the reach of parents and schools. Society is a whole, and no one is an island. Who has counted the data of adult "anxiety"?
In this era of involution of civilization, almost everyone is anxious. If the anxiety is not relieved in time, there may be depression, and "anxious" parents and teachers are more likely to bring out "depressed" children.
Now pay attention to mental health and do some psychological healing regularly, which is gradually accepted by everyone. Among them, "existential psychotherapy" is favored. This method is to channel your anxiety through team communication.
Li Lun, an existential group consultant, has been immersed in group therapy for a long time and is very good at leading team members to communicate, so as to find their own position and see their own value.
In the book "Twelve Nights of Forgetting Worry", Li Lun, in the form of a novel, takes us into a complete group psychotherapy process, allowing us to be there and feel * * * with the characters in the novel.
This book mainly tells the story of eight team members spending twelve nights together. By listening to the stories of ourselves and others and examining our different roles, we can find the crux of anxiety.
Whether you want to find the sticking point of your relationship or learn the actual content of group counseling, this book is a very good choice.
To understand the profound meaning behind this novel, we must first understand what "existential psychotherapy" means.
"Existentialist psychotherapy" is based on sincere companionship. Therapists act as leaders and walk with participants. Everyone is focused on the here and now, participating in the exploration of existential anxiety, so that everyone can see themselves through others. Let them re-examine their life experiences and have the ability to adjust and improve their interpersonal relationships.
The therapist in "existential psychotherapy" is also a colleague. He won't give a conclusion directly like one-on-one psychological consultation, but let everyone speak freely, face various problems in life, and realize the importance of interconnection in exploration.
In this book, every night has a theme. The leader didn't deliberately throw out the theme, but let the participants play freely. Everyone from strange to familiar, from the beginning carefully to the last night inseparable.
Different people will show different personality characteristics, and the eight members in this book all have different purposes of joining the league.
Blue mother is a mother who has entered menopause, and she hopes to ease the relationship with rebellious children; Korean religion is about to enter the marriage hall, but she is afraid of marriage, which makes her very upset.
Cao's entry into the human group accords with his understanding of the development law of human organizations; High enthusiasm and hope to become an excellent psychological counselor; Correct inspiration is troubled by often uncontrollable emotions; Dong is an executive of a company, hoping to improve his working ability.
I don't know if I'm young, I just want to be mature. Zhang, who has two children, hopes to join this group to improve his ability to educate children.
The role design of these eight members is very interesting. They represent eight common problems that cause anxiety, and basically revolve around such profound themes as "what is existence" and "how to exist".
The French philosopher Descartes has a famous saying, I think therefore I am, and I believe many people are familiar with it. It means that the only thing I can be sure of is the existence of my own thoughts. When my thoughts exist, everything will exist.
However, in real life, people often can't find the value of existence, or place the meaning of existence on others. When the relationship is unbalanced, it will cause all kinds of troubles.
Among the players, there is a blue mother. What bothers her most is that her 15-year-old son changed from a good baby to a rebellious teenager overnight.
What followed was the mother's worry. She is worried that her children's studies will plummet and that they will not be admitted to a good university. Without a good university, she can't get into a good unit. Without a good unit, she can't find a good wife.
Blue mother was so sad that she even had endocrine disorders and began to suspect that she had cancer. So, she joined this group, hoping to adjust herself through team healing, so as to better communicate with her rebellious son.
By listening to other people's speeches to the mother and the child, Lan's mother aroused her memories, and every bit of the child from birth came to her mind.
Mother Lan had a habitual abortion and made great efforts to save this son. It is because of this rarity that she dotes on her son even more. However, when the baby was four years old, the unit had to go out to study for one year, so the blue mother had to put the baby in the grandmother's house for one year.
As a result, the child was separated from her. In order to improve this relationship, mother Lan tried her best to compensate her son, but nothing changed.
In the whole communication process, leaders will not easily interrupt the participants' speeches, and team members can express their true views at will, but no physical contact is allowed.
Blue mother's words caused great fluctuations at this time. The first thing that jumped up was Korean education.
While wiping away tears, Han Education listened to Lan's mother recalling the hardships of raising children. However, when she heard Lan's mother say that she left her child and went out to study for a year, she stopped and stared at Lan's mother: "Did you get the child's permission to go out to study?"
It turned out that when Han Education was born, she was taken to her grandmother's house. In the center of Korean education, mom is not busy and she is not needed. Therefore, Blue Mother's words triggered her emotional mine, which was an outlet for Blue Mother.
With such a roar of Korean education, Mama Lan couldn't help it any longer, hiding her face and crying. Zhang is also a mother. When she saw such a scene, she began to cry. After the Korean education has vented its inner dissatisfaction, let the tears crawl all over the cheeks.
Seeing everyone crying into a ball, Gao enthusiastically began to persuade them, but Dong took a different attitude. As a corporate executive, she is more rational than others. She thinks that if someone is crying, we need to give him a space so that he can cry happily.
If you are the leader of this group therapy, how will you guide them in the face of such chaotic scenes?
At this moment, the leader began to speak. He said: "I just heard a mother seem to be confessing, a child seems to be shouting, and people here swing back and forth between this confession and shouting." It seems that at present, there is only one form of relationship here, which is the form of debt. I want to say hello to the people in the emotional whirlpool in the group. Can your tears turn into words? "
Hearing this, everyone stopped and fell into deep thinking.
The influence of being born in a family will always accompany one's life. Happy people can heal their whole lives with childhood, while unfortunate people are often immersed in past misfortunes and spend their whole lives healing their childhood.
Su Mingyu is the youngest daughter in the hit TV series Everything is OK 20 19, but she is very unpopular because her parents prefer sons to daughters. Deeply hurt by her family background, at the age of eighteen, she vowed to draw a clear line with her family and never touch relatives and friends.
However, in the family entanglements again and again, she forgave her parents and helped her in the crises of Su family again and again. When she let go of her past grievances, she also completed her self-redemption.
In a family, it is easy to have a debt relationship. Either you are sorry for me or I am sorry for you. This kind of relationship will be brought into the future social relationship and intimate relationship by us, and will constantly produce a sense of debt and guilt.
There is a saying in family of origin, a classic of American family psychotherapy, that a truly mature person will not blindly accuse his parents of hurting him in his early years, but will put them back in their respective family of origin to understand their parents' behavior and reconcile with their inner obsession.
When we can look at their behavior from the perspective of parents with an understanding eye, it is the beginning of growth. When we can understand why parents do this, we are truly mature.
Change will not happen overnight. "Existentialist psychotherapy" allows team members to see themselves from others, see problems from everyone's stories, and gain healing power in the process of joint exploration, which is enough.
In the psychotherapy of this team, the leader is the most critical role. He must have enough awareness and undisturbed power to deal with the relationship in order to complete the whole healing process.
This book breaks away from the dullness of psychological professional books, adopts vivid and interesting story forms, explores different themes in Twelve Nights, takes eight common life figures as story prototypes, and analyzes the card points of different relationships in life, so that we can not only see ourselves from it, but also think about the meaning of life from the perspective of onlookers.
Each round of healing process is interspersed with professional psychological analysis, so that readers can gain professional psychological knowledge besides reading stories.
Whether we want to explore the value of life or improve our psychological healing ability, we can get energy from this book. Now, let's explore twelve sleepless nights together! # Psychology #