I have read such a sentence:

"A nation can't do without a kind of background and tolerance. A person can't do it without spirit and pattern. "

indeed, we often judge whether a person can achieve great things in the future by the size of his pattern.

but what is the pattern? What are people who really have a pattern?

actually, it's very simple, just look at his circle of friends.

A circle of friends is like a person's facade, which records a person's personality, hobbies and behavior, and hides the truest side of a person.

people who really have a pattern have these characteristics in their circle of friends.

The older you get, the more you find that no one's life is smooth sailing, with more bumps and less contentment.

Therefore, it is often seen in the circle of friends that others complain about social injustice and hard fate.

but to tell the truth, all beings are suffering, and no one is not carrying a heavy load.

complaining may win sympathy at first, but after a long time, you can only show others jokes.

On the contrary, what people appreciate more is another kind of person who can accept the worst result calmly and still be grateful for life.

The proprietress, who used to run a shop downstairs, always opened her circle of friends with healthy food, short trips of the whole family, well-cared flowers and plants ...

Every time she brushed it, people felt warm and bright.

But people who are familiar with the proprietress actually know that she has not had a good life these two years.

The proprietress used to be a product agent offline. Although she was hit by online sales, her profit was barely flat.

Last year, a sudden epidemic caused many physical stores to lose money, and the proprietress was no exception.

But she only sent such a message in her circle of friends:

Actually, everyone has bad feelings, but not everyone can wake up from the long night.

complaining about life blindly destroys one's will and ends up at the bottom of life forever.

Thackeray, an English writer, famously said, "Life is a mirror. When you smile, it smiles.": If you cry, it will cry. "

Complaining can't solve any problems. To win the respect and dignity of others, you must first change your vision and mentality.

Learn to be grateful for all the beauty and suffering that life has given, and also have the courage to accept the facts and the ability to handle things.

over time, under the influence of positive magnetic field, suffering will eventually become wealth.

When people reach middle age, everyone has more or less accumulated a certain amount of savings and contacts.

When chatting with people, I always like to talk about how difficult it was before and how many houses and cars I have now.

even the circle of friends will unconsciously show off while recording their lives, for fear that others will not know their achievements.

But you and I both know that people who like to show off in the circle of friends seem to be famous and beneficial, but in fact the pattern is very small.

an old colleague of the company bought a house in the urban area, which was also a cause for congratulations.

As a result, this colleague was broadcast live in the circle of friends from the delivery of the house, to the renovation and then to the move, which quickly aroused the resentment of others.

other colleagues always encouraged him to treat him, but he was too embarrassed to refuse, and his wallet bled heavily several times.

What makes him complain even more is that his relatives at home are eager to move after seeing it, either coming to play for a few days at a time or asking for money.

borrow it. I actually have a mortgage myself. If you don't borrow it, you'll alienate your relatives and turn against each other.

he just wants to show off, but this kind of show off not only does not add luster to himself, but also affects his interpersonal relationship.

but it's more than just socializing, whether it's showing off wealth or showing off knowledge and connections.

when the ability is not enough to support, showing off frequently will only bring disaster to yourself, and it is only a matter of time before something goes wrong.

Zhai Tianlin, who didn't know HowNet, once confirmed that he would go to Peking University as a postdoctoral fellow because he published his notice of Peking University.

As a result, when answering the question, it caused a heated discussion because of the sentence "I don't know what HowNet is".

Finally, the paper was plagiarized by netizens, and it is still scolded by many students.

in the live broadcast, Tong Zhuo shows off that he faked his student status in order to get into a good school.

Later, as everyone knew, the results were cancelled and the relevant personnel were directly punished!

as the saying goes, when the rice is ripe, the ear is low, and when people are ripe, they whisper.

In fact, if you look closely at those truly capable people around you, most of them are humble and peaceful.

Because the more capable people are, the more they know how to behave themselves, without boasting or showing off.

at any time, be gentle and polite, and be steady and soft.

when you succeed, you are more admired for your modesty.

when you are rich, you are more popular because you are low-key.

With the rapid development of social information today, many people use the circle of friends as a window to build their own image.

in a sense, every movement is a reflection of a person's emotional intelligence and self-cultivation.

Netizen @ Lao Wang shared a very realistic story.

at one time, there was a lot of news on the internet that interns were paid 2 yuan, but they drove to work in luxury cars.

His circle of friends was immediately forwarded with a comment: It's definitely not serious to drive a luxury car at such a young age.

someone explained below: the hotel business that girls do at home has opened many chain stores.

Not to be outdone, the man immediately replied: Then check her home, there are few clean rich people nowadays ...

The netizen said that he later silently deleted the other person, and anyway, there is no intersection with such a bickering person.

the most taboo in friends circle is to judge people without knowing them.

But there is such a kind of people in life who always like to publish some controversial content to show their uniqueness.

When he heard the policy of double reduction, he sneered, "It should have been like this a long time ago. In the 195s, no one made up lessons, and it was not just a generation of talents.".

When I saw the medical trouble, I gloated. "The" black-hearted hospital "received so much money, but it still can't be cured. It deserved it."

I think I know more about hurdles than Liu Xiang, and I know more about piano than Lang Lang ...

Whenever something happens, I should express and show my views.

this is actually a disease, and the cause lies in the small pattern.

There is no high degree of unity between knowledge and vision, and there is no clear-headed cognition, but there is always an inexplicable courage and pride.

The circle of friends is by no means an outspoken place. People who really have a pattern are not eloquent.

on the contrary, the higher the level, the more you know how to be cautious.

don't argue, be sober to yourself and be gentle to the world.

through the ages, those who achieve great things must have a big pattern.

the pattern is not illusory, but hidden in every detail of the circle of friends.

don't complain, have an open-minded and calm mind, always be grateful, and the blessings will come naturally.

don't show off, have a broad and vast knowledge, focus on your own life and accumulate more strength.

If you don't talk, you have a far-sighted vision and a long-term thinking ability, the world will naturally become better.

May you and I both become people with patterns and let the whole world help us.

Author | Xiao Sa

Picture | vision china