China has always attached importance to dignity and honesty. "A scholar can be killed, but not humiliated." "People should live with breath and integrity" and "Life is worse than death". Many heroes and chivalrous men in history risked their lives to protect their faces.

However, it is popular to humiliate others on many occasions now. You are stubborn. You don't eat anyway. You are as powerful as the sky. What can you do in the face of humiliation?

Ten years ago, when I took the city bus, there was a black man sitting next to me. His rolled-up trousers are still covered with mud and grass leaves. At first glance, it is the farmers who enter the city from the countryside, which is in sharp contrast with the passengers who are neatly dressed in the whole car. The conductor went to him specially to check the tickets, but Heihan ignored him for a long time. The conductor urged again, "Take the ticket and have a look." Heihan suddenly raised his ticket and roared, "I'll show you, I'll show you, damn it, if you don't check, check the whole car, dog eye!" " Eyes staring at each other, as if lotus flower appeared. The whole car was startled. The conductor didn't dare to make a fuss, shrugged his shoulders and turned away.

The black man must have growled because he didn't want to be humiliated.

But now most of us, in the face of the ubiquitous humiliation in society, mostly show a kind of numbness.

One night a few years ago, I hired a taxi and took two TV reporters to Linquan, Fuyang for an interview. The car went out of town and passed by the driver's house. The driver said to go home, let's wait a moment. Soon, the driver went out with his wife and mother. Two women looked at us coldly, from head to toe, from screaming to head, as if the criminal investigators were examining the prisoners. The old woman muttered, "It would be better if there was a woman with a child, and all three were men." It seems that they are very uneasy about our identity, and I can't help laughing. "Do you think we are bad people?" The young woman said, "Good people and bad people don't write on their faces." The old lady went on to say, "It would be better to go to Chaohu Lake and the south, but you can't get to Fuyang until midnight, and you can't go by car!" " I said, "What's the difference between Fuyang and Chaohu?" The young woman said, "A taxi went a few days ago, and the car was robbed and people were killed." It seems that they really suspect that we are also prone to murder. We won't be angry at being insulted. Can you blame them? It's no use explaining too much, so we have to find another taxi.

There is no hidden humiliation scene that is often encountered, but it is nothing more than going to the vegetable market to buy food. When you take a little money with a large face value, the salesman always touches, shakes and looks at the lamp in front of you to identify whether you are a fake money given by a liar. To make matters worse, the old salesman will show your money to his peers for a long time when he is not sure whether it is true or not. It must be hard for you to see this situation at first, and you will feel ashamed. Now, you will stand there normally and calmly, waiting for the "expert" in front of you to complete the appraisal. At the same time, you will also check the money he gave you in front of him to prevent counterfeit money. When I bought food in the vegetable market, I met several times with fake money. Now, although I'm not an expert in distinguishing true and false money, I still pretend to take a look at it in my hand to warn each other.

One of the needs hierarchy theories put forward by American psychologist Maslow is the need for respect. Being respected by others is as important as other physiological needs of people. However, many of us are now facing the scene of "humiliation" and ignore the necessity of respect. Can we all reach the realm of "being humiliated, watching flowers bloom and fall before the court, staying or not, drifting with the clouds", detached from things, open-minded and peaceful?

Probably not! We are often humiliated by others, and we often humiliate others and enter an endless cycle. This is probably because there are too many liars today, and everyone's psychological reaction is numb. Humiliated or humiliated, I have already developed a set of leisurely and willing coping skills.