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"Breaking up": Life is too heavy. What changes can we talk about?
A while ago, I wanted to find a book about room storage, Breaking Away, to save my messy desktop, but I accidentally got this book, Breaking Away-The Mind, which is an advanced version of the original. In this book, the author Eiko Yamashita points out that life needs to break free, and the mind needs to break free! The biggest feeling after reading it is that many unnecessary troubles and pressures in life come from your persistence and irrational judgment of your emotions. At the end of the book, it seems to be asking us with shocking words: "Life is too heavy, what changes are there to talk about?"

I felt a lot, so I wrote down my reading notes and some of my feelings.

1, what do you mean by breaking up?

? By cutting off the inflow of unnecessary items and giving up items that look like waste, we can get rid of the shackles of items.

Trim: cut off the unnecessary parts.

Give up: Give up superfluous things.

Separation: get rid of the obsession with things.

The state of "separation": people will naturally have deeper insight, higher viewpoints and broader horizons, and reach a higher realm, that is, the realm of overlooking.

The essence of breaking up and parting: first, diagnose how much energy things take away from you, and then improve yourself by reducing things. This is the essence of breaking and parting.

Overlooking: Examining the possible advantages and disadvantages in the future from a bystander's point of view will often help us make choices unconsciously.

2. Why do you want to "break away"?

? The media publicizes a lot of untrue and unfounded information every day. If we don't agree with the belief, we will be led by the nose like dogs. Prices, medical care, housing prices, jobs, etc. Life is full of invisible pressure, which makes us struggle on the way forward. To survive in this haze, we need to look for inner strength, rather than searching hard in the outside world.

3. How to "break away"?

By exercising the ability to sort things out, re-examine yourself, recognize the relationship between yourself and things, and replace "unwanted, inappropriate and uncomfortable" things with "needed, suitable and comfortable" things, so as to make the living space refreshing and comfortable, thus achieving the purpose of training your overlooking power.

The first chapter is the form of "invisible world"

The first section: from the beginning of cleaning, exercise the ability of life.

"Taking cleaning as an ability", when we don't clean our home or dormitory, we will have negative emotions and even blame ourselves. The book advocates that we can get rid of this view and look at this matter from a overlooking position. The so-called overlooking is to look at this matter that you need to clean up from the standpoint of a third party and make your own evaluation with a neutral and objective attitude.

The principle of total quantity limitation is July 5 1 day, in order to reduce the total quantity of articles in the space and make us live comfortably in it.

Degree.

Invisible storage space can only fill 70%. For example, the wardrobe can only hold 70%.

It can be seen that the storage space is only 50%. For example, the space for putting things on a drawer should not exceed half of the drawer.

The storage space for others is only 1%. For example, the maximum space for putting things on the desktop is 1%, so try to put things as little as possible.

Clear your position: the different effects of adding points and subtracting points

? We always set different goals for ourselves, and always set them unattainable. It seems that the better our imagination, the more motivation we can get. In fact, if the goal is set too high, we often fail to achieve the expected results, so it will be counterproductive and bring unnecessary remorse to ourselves-"How can I be so useless? Why can't you keep insisting? Why can others, I can't "... this is a deductive method. People who are obsessed with the best choice and can't make a decisive decision can easily focus on their conscience.

Corresponding to subtraction, parting is a method of adding points, which requires us to recognize our position clearly, abandon the illusion that we can't reach at present and focus on what we can do. When we achieve the preset goals, we will gain more happiness on the road of life.

The second part: Rethinking the word "pity"

"I can't throw it away" is a strange thing. Why can't I throw it away? All the initiative is on yourself. In fact, in the final analysis, it is just a kind of "pity" emotion in my heart. Intellectually I want to "break up", but emotionally I can't agree. At this time, my inner struggle is the confrontation between emotion and reason. At this time, throwing or not is actually an attitude towards life. In fact, we always focus on the self-imagined tragedy of "what bad consequences will be brought by throwing things away", but there is often no "anxiety" in real life.

Pay attention to things and you will never throw them away.

Our older generation came from the era of material scarcity. Most of their generation have good qualities of thrift, so it is difficult for them to throw things away. However, times are different now, and the rapid development of production technology has filled 2 1 century with things. If you still live in the past values, it will naturally conflict with the real society.

What we should pay attention to is our relationship with the object, not the object itself. The purpose of parting is not to throw away, but to clarify the relationship between things and yourself and cherish what is left behind, and throwing away many unnecessary things is only the only way at first.

Section III: Deeply insight into interpersonal relationships and self projected by objects.

Give up the ideas instilled by parents.

"Thank you" and "like" are two different things. I often see people feel very painful because they can't like their parents. As children, we must know how to be grateful to our parents, but their parents are not perfect people. Maybe we don't like some of their bad habits, or maybe their values are contrary to their own. At this time, people who confuse "gratitude" with "like" will feel uncomfortable, and those who think they are not filial will fall into deep remorse.

Not only in the parent-child relationship, but also in many interpersonal relationships, we will all fall into similar confusion. Therefore, we must be clear that there is no reason to like someone and hate someone. Like is like, and hate is hate. We must bravely admit that as long as we can assume our responsibilities and obligations in a relationship, for example, in parent-child relationship, we may not like our parents' habits and values, but we must be grateful to them and give them a lifelong guardian.

Don't count on your roommate.

Looking forward to and persuading, from another point of view, is actually a kind of blame, and it is completely an insistence on self-expectation, so it can only be counterproductive.

The second chapter transcends the deeper and more mysterious world of luck and misfortune

Part one: What is true positivity and optimism?

Barely showing positive optimism is tantamount to paralyzing yourself. If you can accept discomfort and guilt, then gratitude will naturally come to mind.

The goal of parting is to cultivate courage and consciousness and be a down-to-earth optimist. We should be brave enough to admit our shortcomings, stop running away from our discomfort and guilt, and make our own choices and decisions.

Section 2: Forget about luck and misfortune.

For example, when we buy special items, do we ever think that this is what we really need? Even if you can really snap up bargains, you often want to prove that you are a lucky person by feeling cost-effective. Is it lucky to get something with a high original price cheaply, but it is not practical? A commodity, no matter whether the price is expensive or cheap, no matter whether others' evaluation is good or bad, what really evaluates the commodity is its own feeling. As long as a commodity is what you really like, it is a valuable existence for yourself. No matter what kind of commodity it is, its value is up to us.

Educator Morishinzo talks about fate: people will meet the right person in their life, not one second earlier or one second later.

If you don't ask for it, you will have it. There is no yearning heart in my heart, even if this person is in front of me, fate cannot be born.

"If we can really look at luck and fate from a bird's eye view, we will be sincerely grateful." After reading this sentence and this page (P090), I am more and more sure that the so-called "bird's eye view" is to comment on my relationship with the surrounding things as an objective and neutral third party, so that it is easier to analyze the advantages and disadvantages of one thing and the difference between it and other things. We will face life with a gentler attitude, so we have greater tolerance and a more optimistic attitude towards life.

Just like I always like to use my name as a topic of conversation with others-"What's wrong with a bottle?" That's a bottle; Help a bottle of this or something "(a bottle is my nickname), which is a kind of love for life, an optimistic expression, and a subtle expression that I always face life with an objective attitude. Unfortunately, this attitude was lost unconsciously, either because of the pressure of life, the burden of responsibility, and the eagerness to miss my family ..... But whatever it is, I hope I can regain my optimism and be more active in my struggle in the face of the future sunshine.

? Objective neutrality is necessary, but man is always a perceptual creature. If they are too absolute, they will be ruthless. The scale of this is similar to that mentioned in the last article-like is like, hate is hate, there is no reason, but it must be admitted.

Section 3: master the tricks and pour out energy.

Shelf life, shelf life, aware of your inner enthusiasm.

? It is very useful to take the deadline as the standard of "giving up". Food is the shelf life and consumables are the shelf life. In addition, the answer lies in your own heart, based on whether your inner enthusiasm is cooling down.

There is no "temporary, accidental or approximate"

? If we are surrounded by things we like, the environment of our residence will make us feel comfortable. Ambiguous motives when buying things are the chief culprit leading to a large number of goods hoarding. Most of these things are not clear when, where and how to use them.

To build "your own house". Instead of "the residence of the goods"

? I am the position of "master" and the object is the position of "slave". Leisure and spacious space where things, home and oneself can breathe freely is the basic guarantee of human life.

Chapter 3: Reorganizing the Visible World

? For the classification of goods, everyone's "thinking habits" are different, so when facing the same goods, opinions will be different. The dichotomy of "unconscious, ambiguous and deliberate" is a golden skill to improve the consciousness of people, things and things.

Unconscious: forget the clothes you have; Toys purchased repeatedly; Abandoned receipt

Ambiguous: clothes that others are reluctant to throw away; I don't know if I will shoot an auction advertisement leaflet; I went to a shop where I used it once.

Consciousness: favorite clothes; Working papers in progress; Money, credit cards

The root of parting is the gratitude of "here and now, I am alive". Don't focus on what is missing, but on what you can do.

? When we are lovelorn, we can be sad, but at this time we should "break free" and look down on ourselves. Should we put aside persistence and face a new life as soon as possible?

? If you are sick, can you complain less and embark on a journey of exercise and fitness after recovery?

Even if you have gained something in life, you should ignore it, give up your pride and make further efforts while celebrating.

Life is too heavy, talk about what changes?